naudava

I moved to Switzerland to be with him under the impression that he was going to help me learn the language.I have asked him several times to help me, to take out 30 mins a day & practise with me but all he does is plays world of war craft most the time. He is a very nice and loving man and treats me better than any man I have ever met but all he wants to do is speak English with me. I am not allowed to work until we are married(It is Swiss law) and I dont have any real friends here. I made 2 penpals that are girls but I really wish he would help me more. I fell lonely and isolated and I have told him many times. HELP what should I do? We can not afford for me to go to a school and I have studied my brains out on my own but if I dont have anyone to practice with for real how can I remember all that I study. He will try for a couple mins or say one line in German but he is obssessed with hi WOW game. Should I go back to the states?

OUR HISTORY US:

We have been together off and on for 9years (Mostly on..just broke up for a week here and there.) I'm 30, he's 32. The first few years had some really bad times because of fights but the good times were So good & like perfect bliss. We both were so passionate about eachother & we always said that we made eachother "crazy"-meaning crazy in love. We always had a very awesume sex life together.

The bad: He was a very jealous person even though he was always the one talking to other girls lol go figure huh...wanted to have his cake &eat it too. But he is such a smooth talker & has always told me he loves me so much etc.. etc... I never was a jealous person untill I got with him. After I caught him talking to other girls I became very jealous and paranoid,almost obsessesed. I was always snooping &thinking he was lieing. So those are a lot of the reasons we used to fight so much back then. Oh also he used to drink way too much & go to bars all the time, but never wanted to take me because he would get so jealous of other men looking at me & that he would just be hanging with his guy friends & they don't bring their women.

I caught him red handed cheating on me a few years ago.We split up& I did'nt talk to him for 6months.He came to my place one day & begged me to come back.He said he bought a house just like I always said I wanted.,,no carpet because my chihuahua pees on it lol Huge walk in closets,jacuzzi tub. He said he got it for me and how sorry he was blah blah.

(All of that stuff happened before we were married though. ) So I did go back to him and we got married soon after.

Here's how he proposed: He's a firefighter & one day he called me &asked if I would come hang out with him at his work, which I used to do a lot back then. When I got there I shoulda knowen somethin was up, His whole crew was outside all dressed up in their special uniforms & they were standing around the big red fire-truck.

My man walked me over to the basket on top of the ladder on the truck & said "U ever been in one of these? wanna go for a ride?" I said "Never been in one! Ya lets go!" We both got in &it started movin up,then he jumped out! I was like what! what's going on..The sun was just setting..it was perfect & the most Romantic thing that has ever happened to me! Especially because he just is Not a romantic gesture type guy!

They lowered the basket down level to him.He was on his knee & proposed. So I know he really loves me (no I was not pregnant lol.) & I have always loved him.

So Here's what happened recently:

Thursday we were talkin about payin the bills from bill payer online through his bank. He agreed to do because he is going over seas next month in military & he wants to make sure I pay the bills. So he didn't have the service yet, & I said I would help him sign up for itI started to turn on the computer..(I was happy because Ive tried to get him 2use bill payer forvever!!! It saves time,gas,money ...we live sorta far out of the city..and he always complains about driving & never having enough time). Before I could get logged on computer I got interupted by a phone call from my school.As I was talking he got up, grabbed the bills & said "I'll be back Im just gonna go get money orders & pay these bills..we can set up bill pay another time"..I looked at him like WTF & I could'nt say anything because the lady from my school was talking! He said quickly as he walked out the door "Plus I already put stamps on all of the envelopes" I thought Oh well maybe another time.

Friday a.m. I heard his phone alarm go off early.I tried to turn it off & clicked into his messages instead..then I got snooopy & saw a text from a # I did not know, it said "Is this Lisa?". I snooped more &saw another text from the same # saying "Hey"(It was from Thursday at 2pm..same time that he was convienently not home & out paying bills) I went through his outgoing texts..there was one from him to her that was worded weird, it said " Who are U at?" It made me curious because of the time frame and also because the way he said who are u at? Like maybe he meant where are you at?

I decided to call the number to see if I could figure out who it was.I was having a bad feeling about it. I blocked my #. No one answered but it went to voicemail & it was a girl. I recognized her name & voice she was a girl he had told me about years ago when I saw her name &number in his phone.He had said they'd gone to school together but that he didn't talk to her & he said he would erase her # & he did.

The thing that bugs me is that when I asked him who it was he kept saying he didn't know who it was until I said "Look I know who it is, it's Candice" Then he says" I just didn't recognize the number & that's why I texted asking who it was. I don't know why she texted me." However....

on Saturday morning I decided I would try calling her again without blocking my number & ask her what was going on.

We spend alot of time together but he also gets to do whatever he wants.He went out the night before and got drunk too.He used to do this years ago but I thought our relationship had gotten better,He is goin over seas in military in a month.Do you think he is just scared. What should I do?