itsniffslikejess

there's this boy that goes to my school. everybody sys how we really need to go out already. but he keeps hinting at wanting to, then talking about this or that other girl with me. he's not a majr flirt. but all the girls i know have at one point had a thing for him. and he's never gone out with anybody. he started texting me, and he was so sweet. just like everyone thinks he is. and he keeps saying how alike we are and all this stuff. now he's on vacation, and he keeps talking about all the hot girls he's seeing. im not jealous, but its kinda getting annoying. well....i might be jealous, but im more annoyed than anything, really. so can you name some songs about this situation?

thanksss!. =DD

so, we've been friends since 4th grade. [im about to be in 10th.]

we were ridiculously close in 4th and 5th grade.

then we started going to the same camp and it got weir dbetween us. he wouldnt really talk to me at school in 6th and 7th grade. but i had a gigantic crush on him still.

he's had girlfriends since then, and hes more into punk and im more into i have no idea...uhh not punk? im anything really. whenever i ask ppl to classify me, they cant. :/

but anyways, he started texting me in 8th grade, flirting here and there. but he crushed me when he told me that he was in love with this complete hoe in our grade.[im not calling her a hoe for no reason, she had sex in seventh grade with her mom's bf consentually, and has been sleeping around with anyone ever since.]

she's more his type, but then again he still likes this preppy to the max chick from camp he dates awhile ago.

he told me he likes me, hes told me he had a crush on me when we were little, and over spring break, things got heated.

i randomly texted him a simple heyy.

he asked what brought about my txting him. [quote unquote]

and i told him i was texting ppl i hadnt in awhile and he replied sort of disappointedly. like he thought i wanted to tell him something. but i was so happy he texted me back, i was dizzy.

we texted until about 1:30 in the morning, which is very late for him, and during that time, i found out that he wanted to hook up with me.

really bad.

we were supposed to meet up that morning bc i had a plane to catch later on that morning but he woke up too late.

when i got to florida, we started texting day and night. every hour. i always had a txt from him. at night, things got weird. he asked to play truth, and he asked about how i like to hook up. luntly lmao. he'd be like top or botton? under the shirt or above? is it okay if i feel you up? down? i was so happy he wanted me lmfao. which is stupid, i know. but i mean hey. im a freshman. :p

hahaha.

this went on for two days. and nights.

then, one night, things got really interesting and he asked if i "wanted to try text sex?"

i was like. uhm... idk?

he started it, and i didnt rly know what to say, i like him A LOT. we're nothing alike anymore, and i thought he was completely over even being my friend. the fact that he just told me what he wanted to do with me so bluntly was actually in a way comforting and such a confidence booster.

but the sunday before he started school again [and i was still on vacation], he got weird and only replied in one-worded answers.

the only reason he'd do that would be that he's second-guessing this.

so when that week goes by and im at home and he texts me saying it won't work out, i responded likewise. because we are way too different. and he's too much of a *****.

like before in 8th grade, he broke my heart without my consent.

and we didn't even go out!.

and then about a month later, i had to get his adress, which i already had, but i wanted a reason to text him [he lives two blocks away.]

he coulda just dropped it after i got his address, but he didn't he wanted to talk to me. i know bc my friends told me so AND he kept starting the convo back up when it looked like it was dying. he told me he loved my jeans that day, like he used to over spring break, and kept saying all this crap and complimenting me.

that night, i put my foot down and asked him why we never actually do anything he always says were gonna. he always says hes gonna sneak outta his house and come to mine. but he never followed through before. so i called him out on it, and he said that the next night, at midnight, he'd meet me outside of my house. i was so excited. he asked to go to third, where neither of us have been before. i said no, and he said what if we get into it? i said that we'd see.

HE NEVER SHOWED UP.

wtf at myself. why can't i just get over him? i want to be his so badly, and i know i shouldnt want to. and i know hes just using me. but i know, well knew, a different guy than the one he is now. and i think i'm in love with that one. but he's not that guy. i guess i should get over him. how do i do that though?

any songs, suggestions, advice, etc. would be nice. sorry this is so long.

my sister is the skinny athletic one. the one with all the connections. the one every guy that has ever seen has always chosen.

im the big boobed average smart chick that everyone doesn't think twice of.

im not ugly, i thinkk.

http://i453.photobucket.com/albums/qq258/smartk00k...

http://i453.photobucket.com/albums/qq258/smartk00k...

http://i453.photobucket.com/albums/qq258/smartk00k...

http://i453.photobucket.com/albums/qq258/smartk00k...

but im not her, either.

my bestfirend fell for her, even though i liked him. she loyally rejected him. my other best friend wanted to date her to. she once again said no.

whenever i walk down the street, she gets the looks. well, depending on wher ewe are. but mostly, its her. she doesnt even care about the guy's feelings, shes had so many guys.

but this time was the last straw. theres this guy who said he loved me. he's never met me, although i do know hes not a rapist because my friend is cousins with him. all over the summertime, i spent talking at night with him. he wanted to meet up.

by this time, wed played truth so many times that he even knew what she'd put me through.

i gave him her myspace code, and he fell for her. why is it that i can't ever be good enough? why does everyone always have to chose her??? am i really that horrible? its not even on that level, either. she gets chosen for EVERYTHING first. teams, classes, groups, hell-my friends even call her more than me sometimes. SHE DOESNT EVEN CARE ABOUT THEMM!!! why do i get stuck with being the one nobody notices? its not like i just sulk all day, which it probably sounds like. i go out and chill. im not the quiet one anymore. i am supposedly funny. its just like wtf. why does he like me when he hears me and sees me, but as asoon as she comes into view, im nothing???

i mean, come on. her exes flirt with me to get closer to her because they're so head-over-heels. i just wish there was someone who didn't pick her over me for once.

please dont tell me to grow up, because im freaking sick and tired of sucking it up and letting it go. there's just so much i can takee.

so, in february, he (ty) started txting me like crazy. before tht, we weren't very talkative but we were very close friends still, ever since the fourth grade. i called someone cute, he called me cute. he walked me home, when he normally walked rose home, the girl he liked. he called me hot, gave me txts describing what he was wearing, well, not wearing, and i told him mi life story. he asked me to come over at nite, which i never did, even though we live two blocks away. he told me the day of graduation tht he still liked rose, a complete hoe, to be honest. i think i really liked him. he grew on me. i loved him. and he crushed me.

i just stopped it, even though i didnt get over him completely yet. and at camp, he stared at me for the longest time. idk if it was because i was flirting with other ppl, or what. but anyways, he got with a 12-yr-old, and hes 14. well, nearly 15 now.

by tht time, i was just over him, bc that's what was best.

this year, on mischief nite, i invited him over, and me and my best friend mel went out and he invited brian. mel and brian were flirting a bit, but when nick, a kid ive talked to since the summer, calls me, ty gets rly upset, and almost leaves. and then i tell meghan after throwing several eggs and holding cold bottles of whipped cream, that mi hands are cold. she was wraped up in brian, and ty takes his hands and puts them in my pockets with his.

what should i make of this? hes still going out with the girl, and he still doesn't txt me or talk to me tht much. were both in the same grade, but we have no classes. i just see him eyeing me sometimes in lunch. what should i do? am i overthinking him?

so, they ask for my help. i say that everyone asks but hates me in the ebnd even though its never my fault. they say its fine and theyd never do that to me.

and then they do.

i dont do anything they dont ask me to do. so what am i doing wrong here???