O.D.

We met/started dating in Sept. and everything started off great. She's 31, I'm now 35. We knew that our biggest difference was that she had always wanted to have children at some point and, at that point I didn't. Most of her friends are married with children, so by hanging out with them and being with her, I gradually started warming up to the idea of being a father and seeing the good along with the bad parts. I was in love with her and life was great. I started seeing a long future together and liked the idea of starting a family.

Then, in January, she surprised me with the news that she was pregnant (oops!). She said she wanted to keep the baby, but would understand if I didn't want to stay because I wasn't ready yet. After a week of thinking about it, I decided that this is the fast track to where I wanted to go anyway, so picked out an engagement ring with her bff.

She became increasingly cold and irritable since January, but I thought it was because of pregnancy hormones. Before the ring could even arrive in the mail though, she said she didn't love me anymore and broke up with me. Again, she said the choice is mine to be some part of the baby's life, or to completely leave and she would do everything herself without asking for child support. She said not to feel guilty since she would have gone to the sperm bank anyway in a couple years if she hadn't met the right guy.

I am heartbroken and don't know what to do. Advice? Fix, father only, or freedom?

I'm sure this will sound like a crazy idea at first, but just hear me out before you poop all over me. What would it be like if we made a law that said certain violations would be punished by having your ability to reproduce taken away? I'm not saying to brutally chop off someone's balls with a hatchet, but rather a clean, routine surgical procedure.

For example, if criminal behavior is hereditary, what if part of any prison sentence over, say, 90 days would also include involuntary sterilization for life? It might take several generations, but I would expect a dramatic decrease in long family trees of criminals. The same goes for people who are on lifelong welfare. Many of these kids start having kids as soon as they're able to in high school because that is the only family model they have ever known. It's really getting out of control and it's completely irresponsible, IMHO. If someone cannot afford to feed and take care of a kid on their own, they should not be having kids. Making the taxpayers pay for it is completely suffocating society to the point where now there are not enough people paying taxes for all the mouths to feed.

I think as a modern, civil society, we can solve our problems the same way we control everything else that is dangerous; with licenses. You have to prove you are a safe driver in order to get a license to operate a car. Your car has to pass inspection in order to get a license plate and be driven on the highway. You have to have a gun license to prove you are safe with a gun (in some states, anyway). Hell, you have to have a fishing license so you don't mess up the fish population. So, why let people breed human beings without any control?

Kids should get classes right around the age of puberty to tell them about birth control and the dangers of unprotected sex. If they pass all the tests, they can apply for a birth license when they turn 18, if they violate the license by, say having a kid when they make less than $20K a year, or something, then their license is suspended and they get involuntarily sterilized.

If you still think that's immoral, it's much nicer than doing the Nazi thing and having death camps, or how the Chinese birth limit led to mass killing of little girls as couples kept trying to produce boys. If we do nothing, this society is going to continue the course we're on to everyone on welfare (watch the movie "Idiocracy"). Think about it. If you have any better ideas, please tell your elected officials and I.

Oh, and for those religious types out there, all that stuff about god wanting man to go forth and spread his seed throughout the world? I think that's pretty much a done deal at this point, so stop using that as an excuse to pop out a dozen kids. Unless you're one of the lucky few that get selected for Mars One. Go ahead and breed to your heart (and loin's) content on that planet. Thanks!

I'm considering a transfer from the Army National Guard to the Air National Guard as an O-3. Army officers are promoted from O-1 through O-3, by basically keeping their nose clean, waiting to build up enough time-in-grade and submitting a promotion packet. From there up though, it's different. From O-3 to O-4 requires all of the above, plus serving as a company commander, completion of the Captain's Career Course, an O-4 or higher job opening and approval of a board.

I hear that Air Guard rated (flying) officers primary job is to perform aircrew duty, with leadership only a secondary role. So, what are the requirements for rated Air Guard officers to get promoted? Is it just time-in-grade and staying out of trouble? If so, how many years are required for each promotion level? Please provide your source. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

I'm currently an officer in the Army National Guard (O-3, Aviator) and am trying to transfer to the Air National Guard as a CSO. I found requirements stating that you must be under age 30 to attend pilot training (UPT) without a waiver or Exception to Policy, but have not seen the same for CSO training. Is there an AFI that details all the CSO entry requirements? I just turned 34 but have no objection to contracting for whatever term would be required to serve beyond my retirement.

If it turns out that 30 is the same age limit for CSO, how difficult is it to get an Exception to Policy Letter? How does that process work? How uncommon is it to see any rank above O-1 at the CSO course? Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

So, I got out of a serious/long-term relationship about a year ago and was excited to start dating again. Right away I met a very sweet/friendly girl who is just crazy about me and now we've been dating for about 6 months. She's a bit on the clingy side though and it's getting a bit uncomfortably too serious for me. Especially since she said she loves me and I'm sticking to my gut feeling by not saying it back. I don't want to be bf/gf and have every night and weekend pre-planned with a bunch of couple activities to do. What I'd really like to do somehow is to get some more space from her, keeping it light and fun and start dating other girls -but not break up with her either. Not having any serious relationship with anyone. I've tried to tell her about the light and fun thing but I know it will devastate her if I tell her I want to see other girls. If I would have met her a year after I'd been dating other girls, I'd probably be ready for another serious relationship. Bad timing.

So, how do I not break her heart, but still get what I want? What do I say to her? Is it possible to keep dating her and see other girls too, or is that just too awkward or sadistic to torture her like that, when she wants something more serious and has to settle for a part-time man?

My wife wants to get a divorce. I have two jobs, she quit her only job 4 months ago, so I've been paying all the bills. She wants to keep the house too. The court is going to try to split everything equally, but when will they actually snap the line? When I move out or when the divorce is final? That determines when I want to move out. I'd like to leave now and cut her off from the checking account but after the 90 day waiting period is over, what is the court going to say when they see my (by then) healthy savings account and her spiraling out of control debt? Are they going to let me keep it and tell her to get a job, or are they going to say I bailed too early and I should give her half my pay? Or something else?

We've been married for 3 years (4 by the time this will be over with), no kids and we live in a 50/50 state (Connecticut). We both have 4 year degrees and equal earning potential. She says she's looking for a job, but I'm not seeing much effort or urgency on her part. We've done some extensive remodeling to the house over the past 3 years, but in this market that's just enough for it to be appraised at what we bought it for. So I walk away with nothing in my pocket and nothing owed. As long as she can maintain the payments, she has a home to retire in, or sell for big profit when the market recovers. Good for her, but I’m screwed and may even have to pay alimony!

My wife wants to get a divorce. I have two jobs, she quit her only job 4 months ago, so I've been paying all the bills. She wants to keep the house though. I'd like to leave now and cut her off from the checking account but after the 90 day waiting period is over, what is the court going to say when they see my (by then) healthy savings account and her spiraling out of control debt? Are they going to let me keep it and tell her to get a job, or are they going to say I bailed too early and I should give her half my pay? Or something else? We don't have kids, so this our biggest issue at this point.

I have a Dell Inspiron 6000 that I've had since 2005 with a X7571 40G, 9.5MM, 5.4K Western Digital, Scorpio, Lead Free HDD. I'd like to upgrade it to a SDD to increase the speed and capacity and reduce the heat signature since I have to spend a considerable amount of time with it in the desert. Any suggestions on where I might find a compatible SDD at a good price?

IE, Google Chrome, Firefox, something else? I'm getting pretty annoyed with Google Chrome. Does something else perform better on a laptop?

As in, makes you angry. Not "What makes you drunk" for folks in the UK.

I'm currently an O-3 in the Army National Guard with 13 years of service, looking to try something new. The USCGR appeals to me since it's a closer commute to my house, I would still get to retire as an O-3, I like your PT test standards better then the army's and best of all, no year-long deployments to the Middle East. I've already been in contact with the recruiter, but do you have any inside advice, tips, warnings, etc. from someone who's been in the USCGR already? Officer on Enlisted.

While my unit was at the shooting range last week, I had to take my wedding ring off because the gloves fit so tightly. I put the ring in my shoulder pocket and zipped it up, but at the end of the day when I went to put it back on, the zipper was down and the ring was gone. I went through all my gear several times, but I'm pretty sure the ring is lost in the sand forever. What is the right thing to do now? We're deployed, so it will be awhile before my wife notices that it's not on my finger.

...and don't say "very carefully."

I know about the discount for MS Office already, but do they also have a military discount for Windows 7? Maybe like the student rate?

I'm trying to do some compatibility research on upgrading to a SSD, so maybe you guys have had some luck. Which SSD can I upgrade my Dell Inspiron 6000 with, replacing a WD X7571 40G hard drive? How do I know it's compatible? Any advice is appreciated.