kayla

I have an eating disorder, for a long time I was restricting to 300 calories a day but a few months ago I started trying to recover.. Slowly increasing in calories even though it's so scary, it took me multiple months of struggling and sometimes purging from guilt to get myself to 800 calories.. But then yesterday I tried increasing to 900 and ended up getting so guilty that today I completely restricted back to 300 again.. I want to get better, I don't want to always have headaches and feel like collapsing, I want to be healthy, but I just.. It's hard. I'm struggling. The thought of hospitalization scares me so much, but right now I'm wondering if that's the only way.. I have the option, if I tell my mom I feel like I need to be hospitalized she will call crisis, or I can try and recover on my own again.. I want to recover on my own, it seems so much easier, hospital seems so unpleasant, but I've obviously failed at recovering on my own so far.. Constantly purging and relapsing.. I don't know what to do, should I try recovering myself again or go to the hospital? Which would be hell..

Hey, I'm a 5 foot 3 inch tall 13 year old girl struggling with anorexia (bulimic tendencies) and I'm trying to recover.. Currently I consume 700 calories a day, I know that's too low but I'm still in the process of increasing (I've gotten myself from 300 to 700 within the past 5 weeks) but I was wondering what weight I should strive for? I weigh about 85 pounds right now, how many more should I try to gain? I think 95 is an okay weight for my age, gender and height right? Or should I try to reach 100? Any advice would be appreciated

I have had an eating disorder for a while and am currently attempting recovery. The past few weeks I have gotten my calorie intake from 300 a day to just the other day increasing to 600! But I have these weird feelings I don't really know how to describe.. Like, after a meal I will be soooooo stuffed and bloated in my stomach but at the same time I have this hungry feeling in like my chest? It's like I'm starving but stuffed at the same time, I'm not sure what to do about it honestly, help?

So I just found out from my mom that I have a physical scheduled next week and I am now terrified! I know I have an eating disorder, like orthorexia and anorexia along with bingeing and purging sometimes (not enough to be bulimic) but anyways, I've lost 40 pounds since the last time I was there! The doctor will obviously notice and say something.. I'm 13 year old girl, 5 foot 3 inches tall and weigh 85 pounds. I constantly have headaches and am real weak, I know I need to recover and I've started attempting to do so, my goal right now is to reach at least 500 calories a day, soon I'll be raising that to 600 I'm gonna try and recover on my own I really don't want to go through getting diagnosed etc. and if I am diagnosed what happens then? Will I need to go through therapy? I went through therapy when I was diagnosed with depression and it was hell, I don't want to go back. As you can see I'm real worried. Help!?

I've been unsure about this for a while, people at school always come up to me and ask "are you emo?" Or "are you goth?" Some of my friends don't even ask, they just tell me "You're emo" but am I actually? Like, what makes someone count as emo? I have my hair dyed black and it's parted to the side covering my right eye, I wear all black a lot but not always (I want to always wear black but my parents force me to put on a blue hoodie or something for more color a lot, I still rock the tight black jeans though) and I am band obsessed, my favorite bands are Bring Me The Horizon, Pierce The Veil, Beartooth, Sleeping With Sirens, Halestorm and Falling In Reverse. Also I used to self harm a lot but I am currently in the process of stopping, I attempted suicide multiple times last year and still am depressed a lot finding myself forcing a smile and just wanting to sink into the ground, disappear, escape from the people in the world.. I also am currently trying to recover from Bulimia/Anorexia. Though my friends have no idea that I selfharm, attempted suicide, have Bulimia/Anorexia and am depressed, I don't talk about that stuff often, only my girlfriend and one other close friend know. (Btw I'm lesbian and really open about my sexuality)

So I'm a 7th grade girl and I really wanna join softball again (I say again because I played in 2nd grade) the season is starting soon but I'm not sure if I'm going to or not.. I really want to play but I feel like it would be so embarrassing to join the team with other girls who have been playing for years and are really good and be the only new one who sucks lol any suggestions? Should I join this upcoming season and deal with the embarrassment (I've sorta got some social anxiety problems) or maybe should I wait until next season so I have time to practice and try to get to the point where I at least don't suck? I'm not real sure what to do.. How should I practice anyways? What are ways I can become a good softball player?

I'm a young teen worrying about my career and what I wanna be, astronomy fascinates me and I've been strongly considering a phd in astrophysics, I've read somewhere that the phd in astrophysics would take 6-8 years, though I'm not sure if that is including getting an undergraduate or if that's how long after getting an undergraduate, hopefully that's including it because undergraduate taking like 2-4 years and then another 6-8? That's a long time! I'm real confused on how much school I'd really need to go through, I mean my family isn't exactly rich and I'd also rather not be in college 'till I'm 30

So... Around Novemver 2013 I started to feel kinda sad and just not into things, I didn't think much of it until in December when it got worse and I was depressed all the time, I started slightly self harming and also developed binge eating disorder. In February things got terrible, I was in full out depression, selfharm became severe and I attempted suicide twice.. Then around April things started to get better, and over the summer I thought I was free from depression and selfharm. Then when October rolled around this year I could feel myself starting to feel down and unhappy again, In November my Binge eating disorder turned into something more like a mild version of anorexia with binge eating episodes like twice a week, in December I began self harming again. In January this year I became completely depressed again and developed something like Bulimia/anorexia (consuming between 200-600 calories a day with about two episodes of uncontrollable bingeing often followed by purging a week) Anyways, now in February all this is still continuing plus the depression is insane.. I come home from school and lay in my bed in the dark wishing I didn't exist until dinner when my parents make me eat something most nights.. I think I have Seasonal effective disorder and I don't know what to do about it, I guess I'll be better in April again but I don't want to go through this every year

Age: 13

Gender: female

Height: 5'3

Weight: 92 (128 in summer 2014)

Least favorite season: winter

Currently I get Morningstar veggie dogs but they contain milk, I'd really like to go ovo vegetarian so do any of you have some suggestions where I can get some good ovo vegetarian/vegan hotdogs?

So I've heard that eating more than one egg a day is unhealthy, but is it still unhealthy if you take out the yolks? I love how high in protein and low in fat that egg yolks are! I eat three egg whites every morning, is that healthy?

My girlfriend and I are in a long distance relationship (2,344 miles) and have been together for 7 months, any good love songs I should send to her?

What's the difference between lifting lighter weights for a longer period of time and lifting heavier weights for a shorter period of time? Will you get different results?

I'm a 5'3 tall girl, young teen and weigh about 95 pounds

I know that beer in moderation for adults is healthy and can actually help you live longer etc. but what about a teenager? I know over drinking underage can be damaging but I was wondering if drinking in moderation is still healthy if you're underage? For example if a young teenager had like one bottle of beer a month would it still be healthy, or at least not damaging?

So I've been dieting for a good while now but I seem to only be losing fat in certain places, basically everywhere besides my stomach and thighs, mostly my stomach. Ya know, my collar bones are visible (which is great) my face is losing some chubbiness, you can even see my ribs but my stomach still ticks out like it used to. I just want a flat stomach more than anything, help? (I'd also like to lose thighs fat, but I'm more concerned about my chubby stomach)

I just noticed while looking in the mirror that on the back of my tongue, like near my throat there are these red bumps? I'm really confused.. Could it be from purging? I started purging a few weeks ago, have purged like 5 times the past few weeks.. I know purging is bad for me and I need to stop, I am trying to, but right now I'd just like to know if these could be from it?

So, which would you gain more fat from? Getting a burger, let's say it's like 400 calories, cutting it in half and eating half.. So basically eating 200 calories worth of fast food cheese burger, or 1,000 calories worth of fruits/vegetables. Which would you gain more weight from?

I have some sort of eating disorder, I consume between 400-600 calories a day but sometimes I break that and binge eat.. When that happens I sometimes purge, puke it up.. I know that this can cause a lot of damage to me, I knew from the start.. I never wanted to start purging, I used to sit in front of the toilet debating whether to puke or not but because I know the risks I was able to talk myself out of it, I know purhing too much can hurt me! But eventually I did, the first time I ever purged was New Year's Eve after I binged on pretzels, I told myself it was just gonna be that one time and that I'd stick to my diet after that.. But no, a few days later I binged again, and the guilt made me purge, then a few days later I binged and purged again, and now today I just did it again.. I binged on cherry cobbler, I can't help it, sometimes my mind takes control and I can't help but stuff my face even when I'm full! I binged today and the guilt made me purge for the fourth time.. I want to stop, I don't want to hurt my body! How much more purging will my body take before I start to harm myself? I want to be healthy, I don't want to be like this! It's just the voices in side of me are telling me something different, I feel at war with myself.. There is the part of me that understands I need 1,000+ calories to be healthy and that purging is harmful, but then there is the part of me dying to be thin and beautiful and will do anything to get that! Please help me stop purging

So.. I have some type of eating disorder, I'm not sure if it's bulimia or anorexia or EDNOS or whatever... My diet is about 500 calories a day (mostly made up of fruits and vegetables, one egg a day) sometimes I break and binge eat and because of that I'll purge. The thing is I don't want to purge, I know the risks it has etc. I just can't help the guilt.. I'm trying to stop purging but my family has planned to go to Burger King for lunch and I'm vegetarian so I'll end up getting the veggie burger which has 420 calories! It's so fattening! I was thinking maybe I could cut it in half, eat half for lunch and half for dinner (which would still be way too much fat) but my dad suspects my eating disorder and will force me to eat all of it! I'm scared that after eating the burger I'll be so guilty and purge.. I'm also scared that while we're sitting their eating I'll lose control and binge out on the fries! A small fry is like 300 calories or something, if I did that then I'd definitely purge! It's so hard cause I sometimes really just can't help but stuff my face even when I'm uncomfortably full. I'm a girl, 13 years old, 5'3 and have gotten my weight down to 96 pounds.. I'm scared that today I'll get even fatter cause we have to get fast food! I must make it clear I'm not asking for advice on how to not eat the burger, but how to not purge afterwards (I know purging is bad for me) I want to not feel guilty, I want to not binge on fries.. I want to beat my eating disorder, help?

So.. I have some type of eating disorder, I'm not sure if it's bulimia or anorexia or EDNOS or whatever... My diet is about 500 calories a day (mostly made up of fruits and vegetables, one egg a day) sometimes I break and binge eat and because of that I'll purge. The thing is I don't want to purge, I know the risks it has etc. I just can't help the guilt.. I'm trying to stop purging but my family has planned to go to Burger King for lunch and I'm vegetarian so I'll end up getting the veggie burger which has 420 calories! It's so fattening! I was thinking maybe I could cut it in half, eat half for lunch and half for dinner (which would still be way too much fat) but my dad suspects my eating disorder and will force me to eat all of it! I'm scared that after eating the burger I'll be so guilty and purge, but I don't want to puke.. I'm also scared that while we're sitting their eating I'll lose control and binge out on the fries! A small fry is like 300 calories or something, if I did that then I'd definitely purge! It's so hard cause I sometimes really just can't help but stuff my face even when I'm uncomfortably full. I'm a girl, 13 years old, 5'3 and have gotten my weight down to 96 pounds.. I'm scared that today I'll get even fatter cause we have to get fast food! I must make it clear I'm not asking for advice on how to not eat the burger, but how to not purge afterwards, I want to not feel guilty, I want to not binge on fries.. I want to beat my eating disorder, help?