Chris H

I've been in treatment for many years and I have a difficult decision. I do like my psychiatrist and I know that it will be difficult to stop treatment. However, I just can't afford the co-pays for my medications and office visits. I've talked this through with my doctor and she feels this isn't the right way to stop a long-term therapy. I've been hospitalized after couple failed attempts. My doctor wants me to continue with another doctor if I really want to quit. I'm just tired of being in therapy and I feel its time to try to live my life without doctors. My case is alittle more complicated because of ongoing physical issues (cancer has been resolved, but I'm dealing with hormone imbalances after getting injured and left me without testicles. I'm on testosterone and will be the rest of my life. Because of the highs and lows in hormones, my moods get extremely low and these are times that I become suicidal. Now that I can't afford my doctors, I feel this is a good time to try to deal with my issues on my own. Finding another doctor has not been easy. I quickly learned that doctors dont want to treat someone like me who is already labled suicidal. It's hard to deal with knowing that no one really wants to treat me. After being turned away three times in the past couple months, I just want to stop. This isn't worth the heart ache.

If your husband or bf had an injury years ago and had both testicles removed, would it matter to you. You can be honest. No points for being politically correct.

I had lost both testicles and my spouse don't seem to be interested as she had before. Life after the surgery has been good and bad. I have no more pain, but it hard to get over the physical lost, but I'm ok with the way I feel. I also has the extra skin removed (scrotum) because I could not have implants due to allergies. Because my relationship has suddenly changed and she had told me that it was an adjustment to having this surgery. Although she first told me that it didn't matter, she did admit that she had thought that my desire was going to go away and she didn't want me to feel frustrated. I'm on hormone replacements and things are not the same after other urologic surgeries. After the removal of the prostate, some of the nerves were damaged and I can't have orgasm. This has been more of an issue for my wife. She don't know if I feel pleasure and it frustrates her that nothing happens. I've accepted the lost of this function, but she hasn't been able to find the desire. She don't like the fact that I don't have orgasms. My question is to other women. Would it mattered to you if you had a partner that didn't have testicles and orgasmic abilities. Thanks for your honest answers.

I'm in a rather difficult situation. I can't continue my treatment because of finances. I've been under the care of a private psychiatrist for 11 years who is out of network and I have to pay for 50% and with twice a week therapy, it is very costly and I can only afford to do this for another couple weeks at most. I really like my psychiatrist and she has done both meds and therapy and it I had the money, I would continue my treatment. She has known that I can't do this for very long and has tried to help me secure a network provider, but for one reason or another (mainly about available appointment slots) I was told they could not help me. They all told me to stay with my psychiatrist. But now this puts me in a hard place. I tried everything to pay for my treatments, but this will likely come to an end. I've been hospitalized 4 times and ECT was recommended. I was prepped for ECT last year, but I decided not to do it. Now this treatment has been recommended again by my doctor (she has not suggested it in the past and didn't want to try it because of my past troubles with side effects). Because of my limited time and money, my doctors are leaning to ECT because of the fast effects. I don't really care anymore. I just wish I could be let alone, but this might be my way out of treatment. My doctor didn't want to release me without being assured that another doctor would take me. Because I could not find a doctor that agreed to take me, I think ECT is my only hope. If it was up to me, I want to be left alone.

I've had multiple health problems over the last 6 years. I had six surgeries for different issues including cancer in 2008. I've been under the care of a psychiatrist that helped me through the "seemly never ending" health problems. From the outside, people would not believe that I've gone through so many health issues. I don't smoke or drink and keep myself fit golfing and playing tennis. However the case, I had one problem after another. My doctor had told me that I have basically two things going on with me. Alittle bad luck and family genes. I have sleep apnea, hormone disorder, sleep disorder and nerve damage from a major face reconstruction that has caused major pain when eating and some movement of the jaw. I'm under the care of a pain specialist and I have the pain under control with the smallest dose of pain meds. I also have hormone disorders. For years, I've been treated with antidepressants for the bouts with depression that got to the point that I didn't want to live like this anymore. I was in pain and the side effects of the 16 plus antidepressants I was put on made me more sick. I was on multiple trials of different antidepressants over a period of 4 years. The nerve pain was a trigger sending me in a downward spiral into depression. I was asked to admit myself into the hospital after I failed a suicide attempt. I didn't want any help and I thought I had done my homework in finding the fail-proof way to die. I was secretly angry with myself that I had failed. I had enough of doctors that all the medications that was to help me feel better. I never felt better. The meds had numbed me for alittle while, but the urge to stop the suffering was at time very strong.

I had learned alot about myself through all this, but I wasn't convinced that I was in total control over my depression. My psychiatrist had told me that I had the power to stop the suicidal behavior. I was not sure about that. I later found out that my hormones was extremely low. Very low. In fact I had recently started hormone replacements and within a couple of weeks, the mood had started to shift for the better. The hormone replacement therapy was not perfect and my hormones was still dropping way below normal.

My question is about my suicidal urges. Do you think that some of my serious bouts with depression was controlable? In other words, is it possible that my moods was controlable with self-control or do you think it's possible that some of my physical problems had altered my thinking and had some affect on my moods. I disagree with my psychiatrist that I had control over my bouts with the suicidal urges. She felt that I could stop the suicidal behavior if I wanted to. I don't really know. I do know that women go through depression when their hormones are out of whack. For example, women would go through post-partum depression after giving birth and their hormone are imbalanced. I felt that I've been going through some of the same issues. by the way, I'm a male that had extremely low testosterone levels. So low that it was almost none.

What do you think? Is it possible that I'm going through some of the same issues as a woman with severe hormone imbalance? I don't like to disagree with my doctor, but I'm not sure that she is completely right on this one. Your thoughts please....

I'm done everything that was asked of me and after years of countless medication trials and weekly psychotherapy, I stopped trying. I'm a huge burden on my family (I'm married) and after years of physical problems, my mental state has never recovered. I wanted to hear from others that might share similar experiences. I'm faced with yet another hospitalization that my doctor will be placing me in the locked ward. I really don't like being there and now they want to try ECT. I've rejected it once before because my fear that I will get the worse side effects (I'm not lucky with anything, I would get the worst side effects just from the meds. The depression and suicidal behavior does run in my family. What would you do if you were in my shoes? Is ECT the only thing that is left for me? I've looked at the other treatments, but it is costly or is isn't covered by my insurance.

I had thought about asking this question in the past and felt that I would get bashed and not get treated with understanding. I had many surgeries over the past 8 years and as a result, I have not functioned normally. My doctors are not sure if it's nerve damage or psychological or both. I had my prostate removed (nearly all of it (TURP, which is coring out the prostate leaving only the outer part of the prostate). And I also had both testicles removed due to injury, but i'm on testosterone replacements. I should be about to function, but I have not had an orgasm since the prostate removal. I was told that I will lose the ejaculation and have retrograde ejaculation (nothing comes out, but it should still feel good and I was told that it actually goes bake into my bladder. It's been 3 years and it has not returned,no matter how much i want to. I'm married and I don't have sex anymore because it is too hard for her to not see me feel an orgasm. I wound not fake it. I don't and can't. My psychiatrist had told me to see a sex therapist, but that wasn't helpful. A year ago, I have been seeing a sex surrogate and yes, bit my wife and doctor approve. The surrogate has worked with me and slowly helped me unblock my sexual blocks and has worked on body work and yes, it includes hand masturbation on me. I have the option of having normal sex with her, but I have not done that yet. I have lots of problems feeling pleasure and not even come close to an orgasm. Regardless on how much we had tried in one year.

My question is, do you think it's wrong to do this. I do have permission for this and my therapy sessions with the surrogate is very open and honest and at the same time we have respected each other and it is very controlled and professional. I want to hear from both men and women on this. Please do not submit disrespectful answers. I do respect both sides of this issue. I just want to know what people feel.

I had both testicle removed after a couple years of failed surgeries. this happened six months ago and I was planning on replacing them with implants. I had two different views from my doctors. One told me don't put any foreign materials in my body because I have an history of adhesions. My other doctor looks at this as my emotional well being and if implants would make me feel better, than she would not object to this cosmetic surgery.

My question goes out to both men and women. For the men, if you had both testicles removed (because of cancer or in my case injury) would you leave it alone or have them replaced with implants. For the women, if you had a husband or boyfriend who had this situation, what would you say about it.

Yes, I know this is a cosmetic surgery, but I faced with this situation now. Before the surgery, I was certain that i would not like to have no testicles, even though it basically only for me to see. Now that I've been without them, i don't really mind not having them. Maybe it was a source of great pain over the years and now I can sit (drive, bike) without pain. The scrotum is still there, but shrunk alot. It is clear that something is missing. I have to make a decision and wnated to hear both sides of this. What and how whould you feel about this?

My doctor describes me as high functioning patient with severe depression and chronic suicidal behavior. It is extremely frustrating to be in treatment and to have been in every possible facility for the treatment of depression. I do have a fairly good health insurance and have been referred to many doctors, hospitals and outpatient facilities over the past two years. Even a residential treatment facilities which cost more than $30,000 for a 30 day stay. I'm currently with a private psychiatrist that I pay out of pocket because she is one of the best in my area and she will go the extra mile for my well being. I've already been placed into the hospital for failed attempts in which I'm very angry that it has failed. I admit that I've been stupid in thinking that I can do this without leaving a mess for someone to clean up. I'm not going to go into details on my attempt, but it is a miracle that I'm still here. My question is "what realistic options do I have in getting help or am I wasting my time and money?". Please I really would appreciate serious responses.

This was 5 months ago. What can I expect my life to be? Can the cancer come back?

What other problems can develop from Thyroid Cancer?

Anyone who has been through this?

I'm just lost and worried.

This was a question that was talked about while I was hospitalized. During my unforgettable week in the hospital (no, I wasn't able to leave), I had many group sessions and some of it I actually remembered. One of it was this very question that a patient had asked. Everyone, by this time was very comfortable with each other and even the therapist had offered her answer. She told us that she would only consider suicide if she was been kept as a hostage and beaten and it was clear that it would not end. She mentioned that it would be only to stop the physical harm. This stuck with me.

So, I pose this question to everyone that is willing to answer.

Under what circumstances would you consider suicide? Please no disrespectful answers.

I've owned a few BMWs, but have been disappointed with some of the changes that has happened over the past 8 years. Please don't get me wrong, I like most of the things that the new models have vs the older models. For example, BMW's engines are still one of the best. They have improved most of the interior materials and the handling is still at BMW standards.

My issues started with the 2002 7 series. I think BMW had gotten the message on what most people felt about this design. The 2004 5 series. It was better than the seven, but that wasn't good thing. I must admit that the current 5 series has grown on me and I like it more now. The 2006 3 series sedan still haunts me. The 3 series is the single most important model for BMW and they knew that they could not get this one wrong. The end result. It looks like there were too many people designing the car. The flow and lines was clearly a result of a compromise between the heads of BMW. The 3 series coupe was much better, but it was a reaction of the responses from the sedan. The coupe was very important because the new M3 would be coming from the basic design as the coupe. I like it better, but something about it (exterior) doesn't do it for me.

I might be too much of a tradionalist, but I wish the consumers could have more of a say in the new designs.

If you could design the next 3 series, what changes would you make?

I use to have a fulfilling sex life, but as the depression became severe and I was placed on multiple trials of antidepressants. Yes, I realize that the depression had much to do with my anorgasmia (an inability to have a orgasm, no matter what I do). My doctor told me that it is one of the side effects of the class of meds and we tried all sorts of combinations over a couple years, but it was really frustrating and the sexual frustration was overwelming.

I had to stop the medications because it has turned my life into sexless existence. My orgasms have not returned. I have nerve damage from a couple surgeries. Even sex therapy has not helped. The nerve damage had not improved, but that's another story.

If you had sexual dysfunction from the antidepressants. How did yo deal with it?

I had recently lost a close friend by suicide. He had been extremely depressed and everything appeared to be failing on him. I did not know about this because he hid all this from his friends and even his family. This horrible event has shaken me to the core. While I feel like I've let my friend down by not being about to help him, I also know that thiswould have happened regardless on what I could have done. This experience has made me look at my own life, as I have these feeliings myself. I was told my my doctor that most people during their lifetime will have thoughts of suicide. My friend did not leave a note. Would you leave a note behind? The hurt is already painful for those he left behind, why would you left a note? Wouldn't it be bettter to let go and more on? Please, serious responses only. Thanks.

I've been with my psychiatrist (she does both meds and therapy) for 8 years. I can't believe that I've been with her for that long. I have a laundry list of major health issues that has contributed to my bouts with depression. And at times, it was severe.

I just wanted to hear how people stopped their therapy. Good and bad.

I've been having symptoms of depression for years and there are times that it is beyond the threshold I can deal with. What has worked for you? At what level would you classify your depression. Mild, moderate, or severe?

What has helped?

Which medication(s)?

Have there been any other treatment(s) that you had tried?

I'm looking for some advice on dealing with my depression that hasn't responded to treatments. I've stopped a couple times because nothing seem to have worked. ECT had been offered, but I'm still thinking about it.

Thanks for your input.

This question is strictly based on exterior design only? Performance isn't part of this question? What year, series and which version (M, i, ci, xi, iL, Li, ...)? I don't believe there is such thing as a perfect car and there are some design elements that makes the car stand out. Which BMW do you feel is the best design and why?

Please. Serious question. I had lost both testicles (2 separate surgeries, two years apart) due to an injury. I had gotten hit very hard with my surf board years ago and I never got it checked by a doctor. It did hurt for awhile and it did get better. I must have really done some damage and it did heal. Bit it left scare tissue and slowly the testicle didn't work anymore. It was totally my fault for not seeing the doctor when it happened. The damage was irreversible and the pain was too much. I agreed to have one of them removed a couple years ago and the pathology report showed that the testicle was not working and the damage couldn't be fixed. I did agree to remove it because it was so painful for so many years. Than my testosterone levels were very low and I had to take hormone replacements. The testosterone slowly dropped more and more as time gone on. The urologist had told be that the remaining testicle was not working. Just like the first one that was removed. After being on hormone replacement therapy for the couple years, the other testicle did nothing for my body and it only caused lots of pain. It took me months to accept that I will need to remove the remaining testicle. It made sense. It was non-functioning and cause alot of pain. I agreed to remove it under the condition that I could place implants later. It has not been 6 months since the last one was removed and I was considering not puting implants because they could cause more problems down the road. Although, I would like to look normal again, I don't want to chance getting implants and my body rejects them. I'm ok with not having them. I would have not predicted that I ever would feel this way when the surgery was done. Right now, I have zero pain.

My question is for both men and women. Would you replace them with implants or does it matter at all. For the women, would you care of your husband or boyfriend didn't have testicles? Right now, I'm ok with having nothing there. It actually more comfortable. Anyway, I just wanted to hear your thoughts. Please, no disrepectful comments. This has been a very difficult situation to deal with. Thanks.

I followed all my doctor's advice, antidepressants, therapy and hospitalizations (one voluntary and the other involuntary). I had done everything that I was told to do and I'm still very depressed. I feel stupid for wasting my family's money. At what point should I just stop and let it go. I don't think suicide is a bad option in this situation. Where do you go from here? I've already heard all the lectures on why suicide is wrong. Please don't submit disrespectful suggestions. Thanks.

Please don't answer if you are not going to explain your reasoning. I've been on both sides of suicide. I had a friend who had recently committed suicide and I had been hospitalized for a couple failed attempts. I never asked for help, I just felt I didn't want this life anymore (failed treaments to stop nerve damage from past surgery).

I'm assuming that most people would say there's never a valid reason, but I wanted to hear what you have to say.

As for my opinion, it depends. I don't feel I could tell someone that they are wrong for wanting to commit suicide. Yes, I feel there are vaild reasons, but it has to be looked at from a person's mental state and physical issues they are experiencing (like severe unrelenting pain that can't be treated). Guilt has been the only thing that stops me from completing my wish to end the suffering. This is really a difficult one to say what is right and what is wrong. I believe there is a time that we need to let a person go and end the suffering. What are your thoughts?