Joachim

You sit down to fill out a form, and the two people across from you is a hot lady, and a guy. You feel a foot rubbing on your leg, and you look to the girl and smile. She smiles back and keeps rubbing your leg with her foot. The phone suddenly rings and she gets up and walks away from you; the foot is still rubbing you. There is only one conclusion.

You look over to the guy and he's giving you the look, and he adds a wink. What do you do?

Amongst other things, my friends and I like to drive around with water guns and do drive-bys.

Today is Harry Truman's birthday. It's also the day that the American Red Cross was organized.

Not like a girl ponytail, a ponytail at the neck (not the top of the head)

It will crank, but not start. If the teeth on the harmonic balancer are bent, will it start?

Amongst other things, I know how to make moonshine.

I work at my uncle's circus as a clown

< thus, the name. I don't enjoy being a clown, I just do it to save up money for college. The name fits me, though; i'm the mean clown that the other clowns "punish for not being silly" (like i'll steal a kid's cap, but then another clown will spray me with water).

Mine is Breaking The Law by Judas Priest

I'd change it to something more masculine like Josh or Michael. Nikita sounds like a girl's name...

I've tried Google, but all I run into is a song by Iron Maiden and a really old and crappy 80s techno song.

Anyway, the song is called something like "the final frontier" or at least I remember it being in the song. It starts as like, the mom talking to the doctor, her son is insane, it goes on with a bunch of random sound clips, etc. I forgot the name of the song and it's been bugging me. Words I remember are:

"the final frontier"

"doctor"

"i'm afraid not"

Any help? Also, I know this is the wrong category... But I want answers, you know.

I'm black and I like metal. I had some guy walk up to me today, and he's like, "yo dawg, check out this swag -starts playing eminem on his phone-"

Me: "...-unplugs his headphones and lets The Somatic Defilement by Whitechapel play loudly, headbanging-"

He gave me a weird look and walked away, lol.

For me, it would probably be Challis by Dio.

My friend Shane used to be really into Yugioh. He always pestered me to play it, and getting tired of him asking one day, I said sure. We got out a small fold-out table stood over it.

Shane: "I summon dark magician in defense mode!"

Me: "... I summon fist in attack mode -punches shane in the stomach"

He didn't want to play anymore after that.

As for me, my favorite prank is when I introduced Methylene Blue into the mix. If you don't know what that is, it's a harmless chemical that turns your urine blue (and can also turn the whites of your eyeballs blue depending on the dosage).

My dad was drinking beer one night, just chugging them down. He doesn't normally get drunk, but he likes to save the urge until it comes out in a giant consuming rage. So, I got the idea and sneaked it into his drink while he was watching football.

The next morning, he wakes up to take his morning tinkle... and freaks out. He was getting all concerned that something might be wrong with him, I was laughing so hard.

I'm a Wiccan

I've always imagined an Egyptian girl dressed up as Anubis... Don't ask me why, i'm weird.

I know English (obviously), I know how to speak Egyptian (can't write), and I know a few written words in Tibetan.

I'd choose a goat. I love goats.

-pulls up in a beat up pickup truck and puts on his sunglasses-

Also, if you're going to leave a comment like, "the one with 4 legs"... I will beat you with a rotten fish.

I like Applejack. Redneck girls = always #1 in my book.