Rabisca Julian

Hi people. I was wandering if anyone felt this will to be alone. Do not get me wrong, I'm a very sociable person, i'm pretty, funny and smart, I make friends everywhere and I get along with everyone. But I ******* despise this, the "normal life" and when I imagine myself in peace, i'm in a little house in the woods, dancing naked to cab calloway, with the nearest civilizition like 15 miles away. I don't want to pretend to know what life is really about and the world continues to disappoint me, so why not turn your back on it?

it's really annoying, I have never been able to get fat. I'm like this blond stick, with my bones for everyone to see. I've been accused of bulimia more times than i can remember, because I never eat a full plate (with the exception of some seafood, witch i love more than anything) and I'm never really hungry, because the minute it reaches the table the smell makes me nauseated, losing any appetite I have left. Solutions?

É uma doença compliacada e nada reconhecida em Portugal, Borderline personality disorder, ou limitrofe em português, daí o psiquiatra precisar de ser excelente e bastante estudioso.

I keep watching the same show. I love it and it has 7 seasons. The problem is I lost count the times I watched it, maybe more than 40 times. I watch other stuff but that series is in my daily life, when I'm eating for example and I have no idea what to watch i watch the show. It's been like this for at least 5 years. I just never found a show as good. But am I obsessed? Why won't I get tired of it?

my mother had Schizoid, my half brother, he didn't actually raped me, just experienced. My father was never around and only remembers me when I call him and then he always so sweet, saying i'll be ok, And then another year goes by without a word because I didn't remind him of me. He knew my mom was sick and did nothing for her or for me. Every symptom i have it and if you don't know them go look, it's pretty funny seeing my list of problems, the pretending,having no idea of who I am, i only know that i used to be happy, with 3 years. Just wanted to give a small picture of how many causes of bpd I hitted. And it's awful because i can't tell anyone, it's to horrible, i just want to tell my mother but she would blame herself so much it would kill her. No one has any idea of how seriously ill I am in body and mind

I really wished someone with bpd would answer me, tell me that's easy fix..

I'm a 20 year old girl with 1m60 and 44kg, never rised above 45 and if i don't force, really sacrifice myself to eat everyday i would be dead by now. I can go days on end without food and never never missing it. Since i was born i can only count 5 maybe 6 times that I wanted to eat. Have like a really messy family, mother's crazy, dad dislikes me with reason, i'm not a third of him. Maybe have my mother's disease, bipolar or esquizofrenic (symptoms of esquizofrenia but she insists she's bipolar, i don't know anything, it doesnt matter, she was sick, i forgave her). But I really hate never being hunger, I know my favorite food, and might eat a little bit more if i really really enjoy it, like shrimp or lemon ice cream (love acid food) but still, two bites and i don't to see it anymore. I can force myself to eat, but i get nauseas and i'm having a bad day it'll make so nauseas, just the smell, that I start throwing up! Tryied pills, didn't do anything, but never did a stomach search, you know with camara down our mouth.

My parents are doctors but they never took it seriously, they think it's me being stupid, wanting to diet or they got used to me fighting not to eat, i don't know what go's on their heads. All I know is that i hate food, I wish I never had to go near it.

I'm a 20 year old girl with 1m60 and 44kg, never rised above 45 and if i don't force, really sacrifice myself to eat little everyday, i would be dead by now. I can go days on end without food and never never missing it. Since i was born i only need to count 5 maybe 6 times when I was hunger. Have like a really messy family, mother's crazy, dad dislikes me with reason, i'm not a third of him. Maybe have my mother's disease, bipolar or esquizofrenic (symptoms of esquizofrenia but she insists she's bipolar, i don't know anything, it doesnt matter, she was sick, i forgave her). But I really hate never being hunger, I know my favorite food, and might eat a little bit more if i really really enjoy it, like shrimp or lemon ice cream (love acid food) but still, two bites and i don't to see it anymore. I can eat, if my parents are near by i make myself eat everything on the plate, but i get nauseas and have to go for a walk to pass the felling. Tryied pills, didn't do anything, but never did a stomach search, you know with camara down our mouth. my parents are doctors but they never took it seriously, they think it's me being stupid, wanting to diet or they got used to me fighting not to eat, i don't know what go's on their heads.

My mother kind of made my life a living hell, always pursuing me and telling everyone I was a drug addict with 9 years old and used a really big spoon to make me confess to something I obviously never did, mainly with 9 years. Now I forgave her, she doesn't even remember what she did, thanks to the pills. The problem is that now i'm getting all depressed. And i'm in a completely self destructive path. I lie to my father because I know he would hate me even more if he knew the whole truth. My head is so messed up, i never see whats right in front of me, when do something bad my mind erases it so I won't feel guilty about it, but it happens like a lot. Don't know if it matters but i also am hypertensive but since i'm in college and got rid of my parents I kind of ignore the energy I have and just live a non existing life. My mother, my father ignoring me and disliking me and my step mother really ****** me up. But Î only want help if it's not bipolar or anything like that, i will not turn out to be like the corpse that's my mother medicated and i will not have kids. And i'm pregnant so please help me.