Louise

I'm actually a humanist and feel a lot of empathy. Part of me has grown to be very passionate in that way.

On the other hand, as a child I had what I believe now to be sexual pleasure from hurting my toys. It wasn't quite sexual as we experience as adults, I just know it was the same tick in the mind I feel when I masterbate to sadistic thoughts now.

It's embarrassing so I won't pick out particular thoughts but anything bad and wrong excites me sexually. Even the really bad. I've watched snuff too. I've only acted on the tiny things, but I've not hurt anything or anyone. Luckily I'm a very rational and empathetic person.

I just wonder why I have this other side? I have suffered abuse for most of my life and it has affected me a lot, but it was even before then!

I'm 21 female. Sometimes I imagine when I'm 70 and I think how realistic is it to believe that I will live to that age never losing my rationality, that happens in life doesn't it at times? Will I always be in control of these thoughts? Sometimes I just feel something go through my bodyand tingle when I think of doing what I imagine.

Am I supposed to go for help? I live in UK, if councillors see you as a possible threat to society what happens? I know I'm not. I just don't know how this works.

Thanks!

I think on here I sound like I'm about to pop, I'm really not it's just hard to explain on here haha.

I applied for a trainee sales/lettint consultat position but they said it's a bit difficult because I don't drive. So they said there is a position opening soon as an admin apprentice working in accounts, operations etc.

I really want to be in sales and I do have experience which could support me when the time comes. This is with a really good estate agens and if I had opportunity to progress I'd absolutely love learning the position. Although, if it means I will spend the rest of my life on the same wage always inside, its just not me.

In the interview for sales they said they like to hire inside the business, so do you think admin can be promoted to sales? Thanks!

I applied for a job and a recruitment agency got back to me saying they have some clients in the property sector wanting to hire. They asked what time I was free and I'm going tomorrow for an interview. From what they said I might find a trainee estate agent position, but they never said exactly what roles were on offer, so do I have to revise each role in case they ask if I know what the job includes?

I have an English GCSE but not maths. I really hate the little maths test you have to do if you join a course, and my friend who found his apprenticeship went through a recruitment agency and he had to do one.

I'm hoping that because I won't be doing any course with my job I won't have to do one? I mean basic maths and percentages what more do I need in a world that has a calculator on ever phone?

I just get too much anxiety over it I don't know why. I'm so excited for my interview but if so scared of a test!!

Thanks!

My interview is next week and I m really excited. I finished my business course (at college not university) last year and I m still working my college job, so I m happy I ve finally found a road I want to go down and put all my time and effort into.

Anyone know what to expect? If anyone works in the property sector could you please explain how your day goes and what I need to show I understand in the interview?

Thanks!

Is it ok if I put the permanent silver on, then after I ve washed it I put the lavender on?

Wanting to go a light silver/lavender

In UK

The house is probably worth about 135k but my sister mentioned 110k so I don't know if mum said that's what they get after sorting the mortgage out?

But dad doesn't even know how to use his card or the Internet, and where he will live to be financially fine in retirement seems to be whats stressing him out. He only found out mums done two days ago, and I only found out this morning, but he's a bit physically ill from it and ai think even a little answer off here would help. Just so that next time he brings it up I can chuck a couple of options at him. He's like 53 or 56 or something so he doesn't want to work longer than he originally needed to.

What will happen next?

I think I appear rather normal to other people, I m often told I m crazy in a good way. And I m often the voice of reason, so I m not narcissistic or anything. I just wish people I don t get along with good luck in life.

I used to be very narcissistic though, so I have learnt not to make my problem anyone elses. So I seem like a normal person.

Here are some of the issues I have and things I need to face:

- I m a sexual sadist

- other paraphillias

- severe depression

- anxiety

- sexually assaulted by friend when younger

- mentally abused by that friend for 11 years

- lost virginity while asleep

So I know people fo through worse. But it s because they are ao spread out I don t even know what is the problem. Personally, now I ve learnt to deal more with the sexual assault/mental abuse, I think my mental problem with being excited by particular people in pain is to be checked out first? And my other paraphillias. Because that s what makes me feel ashamed.

Can I go to one person for all of these or am I meant to see different people for different things?

I've found a place called MEDİFACE Surgical Medical Center that looks really promising.

Does anyone have tips or things I should look out for? Will I be ok traveling home after? Cover? Risks?

Thanks x

I don't know why so many places don't just put estimates online.

I live in Leeds, UK.

I've tried working with a couple of charities that help the homeless but they didn't need anyone.

I'm wondering how I can get involved? I want to offer warm meals, but as cheaply as possible as I have free time but this is because I work part time, so I can only invest so much personal money into this.

I'm wondering my restrictions too? Can I just pop a stand up?

I'm wanting my own restaurant one day because I find that industry connects to communities very easily, then I want to work with charities. I won't be investing in a business until I've gained more experience on a management level, so I'm really wanting to gain an understanding of the charities now!

Thanks!

I m a 20 year old female and I went to the Doctors about my mental health, they recommend a help centre which is free on NHS.

I think there is a lot connected to my current mental health so I m not sure if I should just pay to really get what I need, but I don t know which or how it works.

I ve been severely depressed with anxiety and also suicidal for a year, depressed for the last 5. I m not suicidal now but it will come back so I just want to sort it. Most comes down to mental and physical abuse, but I m also a sexual sadist with other paraphillias that are just wrong (never even want to act them out!!) so I wasn t sure if that then meant I needed a psychiatrist instead?

I just need directing. If I m going to be open with someone about the embarrassing things in my mind I want to make sure they cover everything.

Thanks!x

I'm 20 and I've had sex literally twice..

What even is life.

I have just had pretty unfortunate experiences that made me really scared of sex, and other problems in life when younger have made confidence a huge problem for me. After years of hard work I've finally come to a place where I'm learning to love myself and I don't fear sex like I used to. I'm just not sure what the next step is or how to do it. I'm about to date a guy and if we hit it off he does seem quite a gentleman. How is best for me to approach dating? In the past I've been too embarrassed to say how little sex I've had but this has made me put off and ruin it because then I think the guy is expecting too much.

So how do you think it is best for me to explain later on to guys? Because in the past I've found some to be quite insensitive.

Or not that they believe, but that they choose to invest so much of their life into a particular religion that has really created huge obstacles for them just to live their life?

I often find a lack of logic in religious, so I'm guessing I'm going to be told they have their own relationship with God so they know he loves them, ignoring what is physically written and believing what they want to believe. As most do.

I know each individual has their own reasons, but I'd like to hear some to get an idea.

I don't have the money to donate at the moment and I get paid in cash so it's already a pain having other monthly donations taken out of my account.

I live in UK, what can I do?

I'm usually diplomatic and decent when debating because I'm confident any opinion of mine is supported by some good statistics. But there is one thing that distracts me and it's smirking! I've only come across three people like that and they are my dad, a Catholic preacher, and my old manager.

It pisses me off so much, because all three would be contracting and just generally stupid, but those are the people that smile thinking they are the wisest old timers on this earth.

It's very distracting because it's like they are mocking you, know what I mean? I just want to know how jest to approach people like this.

I think about it a lot. I always thought I'd have till about 30 but I'm 20 and I'm too tired now. I hate sounding cliche and over dramatic because I'm not, and it's probably me never allowing myself to acknowledge the depression all these years that's lead me to bloody severe depression. Yeey!

So yeh how can I avoid suicide? I can handle the depression but being suicidal has just really shocked me, never felt so paralysed before. I'm going on the basis that if suicide is to escape the pain then maybe I should just leave and go somewhere? I just want to go and not be who I am!

I'm 20 and I just did a business course but it focused more on running a business rather than getting out and doing it.

So what I need really is advice for starting a small business.

What is the easiest way to get an understanding of all the legislation you need to know for a restaurant? Best capital for a small business at my young age?

I don't want to commit suicide but I probably will whether it be 6 months or in 5 years, I can just tell I'm running out of juice.

I said in a post before that I'm 20 so I'll avoid it but I want to make like a suicide box but also have memory photos in and stuff. I'd just rather have everything I need now for me to have a choice and things to remind me to stay :)

Soooooooo I was going to go for nitrogen suffocation but it's like £200 so what is cheaper but also doesn't cause the body to panic?

Thanks!

I'm not planning to anytime soon, I'm only 20 so I'm definitely going to keep trying to get better. I could handle depression for years and although I don't love it I can now handle this severe depression and anxiety (didn't even realise till the doctor told me haha) but I can nooot handle these thoughts and this need to just black out, it's a completely different ball game.

So I think it would help me stop thinking about it if I actually knew more, then, going on the basis most that are suicidal don't actually want to die, maybe the reality of it will scare me off

Juuuuuuuuuust incase though :)

Thanks