?

I connected majorly with this girl over the past two months. We talked about everything and for the first time i could fully express myself. Ive been closed off since childhood from emotional abuse that i work through. 

Last night we got in an argument and ended it. she asked why i was sad. I explained that i pulled another 60 hour work week and that my boss keeps abusing us. My boss gaslights us, we skip lunch and breaks because she uses it against us if work isnt done. We come in early stay late, fear of even using the restroom. My ex told me that she doesnt believe me. I did a double take. She kept cutting me off and saying im telling her a lie. She said i could go to lunch and she doesnt believe i work that hard. I bursted into tears, i finally opened up and she didn't believe me. I go home from work everynight and pass out from fatigue. She then says anyone who deals with that would speak up. I have called my boss out, i continually look for jobs in my field, i have been to Hr and they dismiss it(we will look into it). The bosses and hr will say take your lunch but when we do we're scolded by passive agressive behavior. My ex continued calling me a liar. At one point i did lie, she was like why cant you find a new job. The truth is i was tired of rejection but i panicked said i have two interviews. I felt scared to be honest and retreated with a lie. She broke things off and  now im labeled as a liar. I loved her but my biggest obstacle was ignored and labeled. 

To cut a long story short, took my mom out to eat. Our waitress kept talking to me and tripping over some of her words. She kept refilling my drink when I only had one sip out of it. This happened throughout the whole night.

My mom eventually told me I think she is into you. I had my suspicions since she kept coming over to my area to talk and refill when I hardly drank my beverage. The last sign was as we were getting our bill she drew a really elaborate picture which is crazy considering how busy the restaurant was. Afterwards my mom told me that I should have asked for her number or to come back later to ask. My mom is always noticing when girls are eyeballing me so maybe the waitress was just being nice, which is why i never pursue any (since its there job).

Later on I told one of my best friends who was friends with her in college and she ended up looking at her account. She told me that she saw alot of pics with her and a guy that were clearly relationship pictures from the past three years. She even noted that the last post was from last month with the two together with heart emojis. She did find it odd that she didn't have their relationship in the about page and that she hasn't posted many pics with him from the past year.

The only thing that I could conclude from what my friend was telling me was that she could be in an on again off again relationship. All i can do is speculate. Any thoughts and opinions?

I just got out of a terrible job and as a result I lost my creativity. I went through terrible blocks at this job for years since it was a very critical and demanding workplace. I've tried to ease myself back into designing but I've lost my touch. I don't even know how to be creative, i've tried everything under the sun from moodboards to new music to looking at good and bad work. Something as simple as making a resume i'm struggling to even start I just have a bunch of random nodes on the page. I've never felt so blank and void of ideas in my life and its been stretching for months. I'm worried because i need a new job but I can't produce anything decent. I've tried to be less critical but it results in me staring at a chaotic and messy canvas for four hours.

HELP!!!

Recently I quit my design job and in this job I constantly had daily ruts. Prior to the job creativity flowed through me and when I was in a block I usually had a rational way out. I believe the constant last minute deadlines and the endless nitpicking got to me and my brain froze up. I've tried to do different things to help over the course of the year such as exercise, diet, traveling, new hobbies, breaks,etc. but my creativity is gone. I feel paralyzed. Even right now I'm struggling to think of how to design a resume. In years past I would have a bazillion different ideas that i'd tinker with but now i'm just cloudy. I have a journal that is just full of rectangles but not a single design on them. I'm paralyzed. My job created such an amount of fear and pressure and psychologically I told myself nothing has to be perfect but i'm still blank.

This isn't the usual creative block and i'm scared to design basic things. :(

I booked through Vayama which i check the reviews like I have always done before purchasing and they were 50/50. I quadruple checked that all of the information was correct and after booking I noticed I put in the wrong date by a day which would conflict with my tour (my tour is super short so I want to maximize it). I immediately called vayama to see if they can change it to that date.

I immediately realized that 9/10 companies won't change or adapt your flight because its your fault ( i admittedly know it was but i hate feeling stupid when i took the precautions of preventing this). I talked to representatives and instead of offering to change it they said they will cancel it and i can rebook it. Only problem is they said i'd be refunded in 5 days. I checked forums online and so many horror stories popped up with people not getting a refund period!

This scares me because I have to buy my tickets for my tour which is soon! Do i book new tickets through the airline which will be pricier around 2,500 or do i wait 5 days for the refund?

My fear in waiting 5 days is that I won't get the refund. I also fear that if I buy the tickets now and don't get the refun than i'm going to be 8 grand in the whole from the trip.

The whole point of doing the trip was to save money and take my first vacation. It was only going to cost me originally 3 grand but now this headache could cost me my entire savings! HELP!

Last week my coworker was informing me about a local convention that i should go to and she said her friend from lincoln is coming. Then she non chalantly said shes super cute and proceeded forward with the conversation. I was super stressed that day so i didnt focus on that line.

Fastforward to that day i met the girl and loved her personality. We talked a few times but mostly in group conversations . we didnt have but a few rare instances of one on one time. I had to leave early and i didnt see her again that day so i missed the boat. Idk what i should do.

All i did at work today was mentioned to my coworker that it was great meeting her friend and having a great time at the con.

Idk if i should ask what her friend thought of me.

I also know having gratitude helps, as well as prayer, but these are just bandaids.

So why is it that we work all day to come home and have to clean, cook, pay bills, job search. I just feel like life wasn't supposed to be this way, yes people hunted for food in caveman times, but at the same time they hunted for four hours a day and then came home to relax. I am aware that we have so many luxuries that they would kill for. Even though I realize all these things that others always have it worse, I still feel like crap. I even volunteer and feel bad for feeling this way, but can't escape this feeling.

Its just odd that we go to work, to come home to work. Then you throw in exercising which i dread, despite trying to make it fun. Even my own personal career that i went to school for isn't fun. Like it can be at times, but when i come home and job search all the time and can't find anything its depressing. When i work towards my portfolio forgetting all that i learned in college, its depressing (the whole go to school to get a job thing was depressing even.)Not to mention it just feels like i'm just stuck in one endless competition for resources. Its hard not to see everything as a competition when life sucks.

Even outside of job searching, dating is even competition. I don't even want it to be like that but it is. Even dating sites are arranged like they job sites. Looking for this with exactly this, pretty much looking for someone who has every perfect quality.

So i just finished a project and they want an itemized bill. I've made plenty in the past but they was a tax id. I don't have a tax id since they are my first client. I was told by my mother's friend to just use my social, but I'm not sure thats safe considering that were exchanging the bill via email. Suggestions?

Before anyone jumps in and says you have it good you have it better then people living in a third world country, i am aware of that. I'm aware that i have a body that isn't disabled and that I have my somewhat of my health. People always say it gets better (don't leave a comment about religion), but it hasn't. Graduated college something i should be very thankful for, but I'm not. I'm doomed and can't even find a minimum wage job, i've considered taking college off of my application to see if i get bites. I wasn't even happy when i graduated, i don't even get happy at all, i just pretend. I've seen counselors, i've talked to people but nothing changes. I exercise daily but the more i run outside the less i can do because of the pain in my body (i still try everyday). Despite that i'm in decent shape, not fat by any means.

Things just confuse me. I thought life was going to get better but it never has, so i've tried carving my own path. I try making friends by going to conventions, creating clubs, attending groups but it just ends up being aquiantances that i only talk about similar interests with. I'm still single, every girl i've talked to flakes on me before our dates. Bills are piling up and i'm blowing through my savings I've had since i was six. I knew life was going to be hard, but i didn't know it was going to be unable to hardly eat, have zero friends, zero relationships, and suck at everything i practice.

So i need to move out of my parents.I just graduated college and didn't work during my senior year of college since my classes were studio classes (4 hours long, plus outside work) so i pretty much blew through savings so i wouldn't have to go to college for five years. To cut a long story short, my sister who is 26 is still living at home, parents are fed up with her and fought with her about moving so i overheard my dad saying i'm a failure. I don't know where i went wrong with my life.

So now that i'm done with school i finally found a job for my field. I got hired but i don't get paid but every 2 months. I also found a second job, only problem is that i'd have to work it on the weekends since my main job doesn't have set hours at the moment. Hence why i needed this second one to bring some sort of income in. My main concern is that the main job mentioned that closer to busier times i'd have to come in on weekends but its not definite, its scares me because idk when i'll be able to work the second. The second is a retail job which from my experience are demanding.

^in terms of this paragraph how would you manage this situation or am i screwed?

Secondly i found a few apartments throughout town costing 600 a month. Since my main job doesn't pay me until every two months(which i haven't even received my first pay check), what should i do. I have a small amount in savings but this seems so risky especially since i'm paying 600 a month in loans and gas as it is.

So as required i'm visiting the dogs at the owners house three times a day. Once at 8 in the morning, once at 1 and once at 6. Six oclock is their bed times and i'm to put them into their kennel. They are very small dogs of old age and the owner didn't tell me how often to feed them (a detail i forgot to ask about). My fear is feeding them at 6 and then returning to find a messy kennel at 8 the next day especially since it has pillows and other materials that would be washed (which i don't have a machine for). Should i just feed them at breakfast and lunch? I've read before that most owners just feed their dogs twice a day. Thanks for your time

I'm beyond mad, i've been looking forward to my college graduation for ever and my parents have been asking me about dinner options for the past couple of weeks, i threw out suggestions. Out of nowhere my mom told me that after i get out of graduation were going to my old neighbors highschool graduation party and won't have dinner until all the family can go have a meal (my sister). She works everyday so that won't be until next week or the following week. At that point its not even graduation dinner......this kinda stuff always happens and i'm not bothered by them. Its just this is the one time....they said i could have friends over for pizza but i don't have friends......

The icing on the cake is that my dad has been telling my old neighbor he'd go for the past week. I kinda feel unimportant

Its more complicated than it should be, all our problems are created by people. I'm tired of being just a number seeing numbers.

I just finished college and regretting it(i didn't even want to go but parents forced me to). I just feel like i'm going to explode from stress as it is and now i'm going to have bills out the ear. I had trouble as it was feeding myself, but now moving out will never happen. All the stuff thats expected to know on the loans site is pins, numbers, percentages, etc. I'm about to die.

(i get it others have it worse i just don't see how people deal with it or keep their sanity).

Whats worse is that i have zero friends, never had a relationship and extremely depressed and lonely. I reach out to people all the time but nothing goes anywhere. I don't go to bars and clubs, i try meetup groups to hang out but its the same groups hanging out and not being too friendly. So my personal life has been nonexistant. I just feel like a slave to going to school, work and home.

The hobbies i used to love depresses me because no matter how much time i put into it i don't get better and whats worse is that there are kids whoa re just starting who are better than me (there always will be that but it drives me nuts). I just can't do it for the love of it anymore because those thoughts loom overme like i have to get good before i die, otherwise i'm just another number and my life is meaningless.

Lastly work is work and consumes my life, i fear all i willdoiswork.

I'm living a life that i should be happy to live, graduating college in two days. I have so much to be thankful for but it means nothing to me. I've always felt depressed but didn't have the money or parenting to allow me to see a therapist. I'm always reading self help books, writing things to be thankful for, exercising, trying to talk to others, but it still doesn't help.

With graduation around the corner i can't help but feel that i haven't made any solid relationships, just aquiantances to add to facebook. I've never had a girlfriend or dated so leaving college the chances go down since i don't see many girls in my community. Plus i don't go to bars and dance clubs. I"ve tried joining clubs for interests, all male dominated, but feel so left out or alone. I talk to people on campus but usually have little to say, i just don't feel much of anything anymore.

Nothing is really fun anymore and nothing excites me. I just feel so dead inside, i know having a relationship wouldn't fix it, but i've always wanted to experience one. Don't tell me go to church i stopped going after 21 years of attending.

My favorite hobby doesn't make me happy anymore because i practice 8 hours a day trying to improve but failing. I see beginners learning faster than me and feel like i'm not getting anywhere at all. I just can't break this mindset despite telling myself its not about improving. I just feel so dead. I just don't want to live a life of going to work, home, drawing by myself.

For many years of my life i wouldn't say much, i just didn't have anything to say at all. Most girls would say that i was nice or boring. I became more observant in time and made nice comments and talked about school or whatevers happening currently. I didn't have much to say. It was always like that for many years until this year when i said screw it and said things opposite of what people would say but jokingly. Its nice because i get a reaction out of people and laughs now, but today the girl i liked blocked me on facebook for it. I called her a nerd but jokingly. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't have much to say when i'm talking to women other than asking them about their day, interests, making comments or saying something out of the ordinary. I just don't have anything to say. Girls wonder why i'm single but i just don't have anything to talk with girls about, even with friends i run out of things to say. It sucks because i'm graduating this year and the only place ill see girls is at the store or work, but i can't flirt at work and i find asking strangers for numbers to be gross. I can start conversations but thats it. Girls also don't contribute much in conversations.

I was talking to a girl in my painting class about our paintingts and i said say tuesday after class would you want to get lunch? She responded to my painting remark and then said hmm this week is kinda rough.

I agreed with her and said i feel you, its almost finals time. I continued the conversation just by saying i don t know what painting to still bring to crtique. she didn t respond. At that moment i took it as whelp shes definately not interested.

This morning i woke up on my messager and she said hahah don t bring in unfinished work and said sorry i was bartending. UGH

This was at 3 am she sent this. So i don t know if its one of those things where she s testing me or she generally is busy. What step would you take from here?

Forgive me for being so stupid. I haven't been in math classes in ten years. I know it can mean multiple things depending on the shape but i'm so hazy.

So she is having a get together for friends, its not actually her birthday since it was earlier in the week, but for whatever reason i feel obligated to go. Its super far from me and in a part of town i'm unfamiliar with (driving also gives me the worst anxiety especially in that part of town since its uber busy). I already gave her present this week, but like a fool i accepted the invite on facebook earlier in the week. To make matters worse when she brought it up in school i said that i'd probably go with them just to dinner and not go to see hunger games, because i hate those movies.

I have to leave in a few hours and i just feel anxious. I really don't want to drive super far just to have a hamburger and leave. Not to mention i'm flat broke this semester. I have christmas presents to buy next week and gas and other things to get to and i feel like i'll be barely to afford that as it is.

What makes me feel even worse is that i texted a bit ago saying that i wouldn't make it since i have a flat in my front tire. I told her a few weeks ago that i had a flat in school that needed repaired. I just hope it sounds reasonable. It is true that my tire is low and the place i fill it at everyday, has a broken gauge now. So if i were to go, i would have to drive completely out of the way to get air, then come back to my part of town and then clear across to her part of town. Which would take away from the gas money i use for next school week. I don't have a job atm.