Madison Courtney

i havent drank anything other than water in almost 2 years.

well, very very rarely i will drink a small glass of lemonade, or 100% grape juice, but never any kind of soda, coffee, or sugary drink.

and i used to drink 2 big bottles of evian a day, (i spend about 2 hours a day working out and i sweat a lot.)

but lately even taking a sip of bottled or tap water has been making me incredibly nauseous or has even made me throw up.

whether ive eaten or not yet, a small sip is making me incredibly sick.

i dont understand, i need the water to keep from getting sick, yet its making me sick.

id really rather not go to the doctors if i can just figure out what it is on here.

any suggestions?

i mean over the counter, any diet pills anyone knows of that i could get a drug store or at walmart, etc.

id really like something to help me lose weight since apparently changing my diet and exercise arent helping at all.

i eat 1200 calories a day, run 2 miles every day, and spend 1.5 hours at the gym doing a different routine every day yet i havent lost a single pound and i swear im just getting bigger.

so please, please tell me if you know of any diet pills out there that actually work!

i dont care about healthy.

i want to be 90 pounds again,

currently 119 pounds.

and i feel horrid being this size at 5'4!

ive tried eating healthy and working out for an hour every day but i actually gained weight and can no longer fit into my size 2 jeans!

so im trying to find any way possible to get to 90 pounds, a size 0 in jeans! (my hipbones are too wide to go in any size smaller than 0)

would eating nothing but rice and chicken broth and working out an hour every day do anything?

i have an eating disorder, and i do not want help.

i just want to be skinny again.

now before people start making fun of me, im very aware i cant become a REAL mermaid. im talking about like what Hannah Fraser does at the Atlantis theme park.

she puts on a big tail and swims around in a tank all day.

but how would one get training for that?

i already swim every day and i love the water and im very good at swimming without moving my legs apart. but most swim in salt water tanks with their eyes open, so youd have to get used to that. and youd have to have training around the sea creatures. living in north texas i have neither salt water, nor sea creatures:/

how do you think one gets in that profession?

like if someone anon messages you on tumblr

can you tell their IP addresses from on your phone?

i havent been feeling well all week, ive been having HORRIBLE headaches.

well today while i was sitting at my job at work i suddenly felt this huge pressure on my right eye and this horrible pounding sensation in my right temple that spread over the right side of my head.

now whenever i tilt my head to the right i start to feel super dizzy, and i start to black out.

also the pain in the top part of my head gets worse,

but my actual face like my mouth and stuff goes numb.

should i go to the doctor for this? i rarely ever go to doctors, i find them to overreact a bit.

im becoming a healthy person (eat healthy, work out daily), when i do get sick i never take meds, i just sleep it off but this pain is ridiculous.

however i have attempted suicide in the past by swallowing poisons, and im also a recovering anorexic.

could something i had done in my past triggered whatever these headaches are? or could it just be because of the shift in weather?

im 18 years old and ive always had weight issues.

currently im 5'4.5 and 115 pounds wearing a size 2.

is that healthy or should i lose more?

i really want to be 100 pounds.