Adult sibling rivalry. What would you do?

Question

My friend who does not have the internet, has a sister, RP, that she has had a problem with.  They had a disagreement about everything and yet, my friend still wants a relationship with her sister.  She even sent RP a Christmas card that RP promptly threw away without even opening it.  They live in different states so seeing each other is not an issue.  Their mother isnt in the best of health and my friend would really like to have some sort of relationship with her sister.

The 2 girls are very different from each other.  One is happily married but with a hard life (my friend) and her sister is 8 years older than her and acting very immature (multiple boyfriends, things that she was not raised to do, etc).  They are both in their 40's but RP says that she is in her younger 40's vs older.

So, what would you do this situation?  Should my friend just forget she has a sister or should she still try to make contact?

Serious replies only please.  This is important to my friend.  Thanks.

Just Me · Accepted Answer

I have an estranged brother who doesn't return my calls (or anyone else's for that matter) and never contacts us.  I still send cards and leave messages because I am convinced one day he will need his sister and I want him to know that even though he has chosen for whatever reason to back off from our family, that I am still here and he's still in my thoughts and I'd welcome him back into my life with open arms, no questions asked and with no animosity.

sam · Answer

I too have siblings who sometimes dont talk. I recently sent them all a letter which says very simply:
We are adults now, we have different likes and dislikes, We cannot pick whom our siblings choose to spend the rest of their lives with, nor can we tell each other how to raise our children. Yet we do have one major thing in common, we all the have the same blood running through our veins, we are a family. We are all in our 40's and life is not getting any longer, so I am writing this to let you know how much I love you all. 
I didnt take the time or energy to define on each person faults, I just explained why we should get along, and it seems to have worked. My best advise is  try it.

Anonymous · Answer

Keep on trying, you never give up on family it's a bond that always keeps you together. Try going up there for a vacation and visit her face to face. But even before and after that keep writing your letters and postcards.

Adult sibling rivalry. What would you do?

Trending Questions