Is it right to let your 18 yr. old daughters 25 yr. old boyfriend spend every night with her in the same bed?
I'm her soon to be step father and feel its wrong. When I expressed my opion to my fiance' she got irrate with me and wanted to break it off. She says she's ok with it and its her house ect. This guy doesn't have a car, smokes weed, and and has constant on again off again fights with the daughter. In my opinion he is not right for her but the daughter obviously is in love/infatuation with him and there are some other issues which contribute to me and my fiance's disagreements. I feel like I don't have any say in her life or unable to say how I feel because it'll rock the boat too much and one of us will have to bail ship! Am I wrong? what can/should I do?HELP!!!!
Anonymous2008-03-29T00:00:45Z
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Ok first off your entitled to your opinion, but she's not your daughter therefor you have very little say in what goes on. Secondly she's 18, she's an adult therefor she can sleep with whomever she chooses. You need to back off and stay out of this, otherwise your gonna make things worse. By the way I think your wife is overreacting just a bit about wanting to break things off though.
She is 18, she can do whatever the hell she wants---but not in your house. Your house, your rules. Not your house, tough. No, you do NOT have a say in her life. She is legally adult and not your child. But if you're stifling your opinion to prevent a break up you are setting yourself up for disaster.
It is obvious that you and your fiancee have extremely different moral beliefs. And apparently breaking the law and smokin a doob is cool with her too. People in love do not threaten to end the relationship due to a difference in opinion.
In short: the girl's life is not your business. The woman does not respect or love you. Run now. Right now. Stop reading this and run.
It does seem very wrong. Your Fiancee feels that your the one in the wrong, but it sounds as if she is. Are they using protection. This is a issue you need to take up with your wife. I can see you care dearly for you step daughter, and only want whats best, butshe must learn from her expierience. Just make sure they are using protection, otherwise it could all get a bit bad and he will probarley leave her. If he smokes weed in your house, this is a serious issue. Tell him to stop it or get out. If he gets violent, I hate to say this, but the police should be involved. Hope I helped
Eh, that's kind of tough. If she's 18 and the mom says yes, then i guess that's their call. And if you did say something, she might leave and then your fiance wouldn't be too terribly pleased... I would say just stick it out and wait for her to move out, which could be sooner than later as she's 18. But I agree with you- there's no way in heck I'd let either of my daughters have a live-in boyfriend at that age. The thought puts me on edge!
it is wrong of course, (well thats my opinion) well its only wrong if shes not using contraception... at least discuss this with your fiance. She should be worried about that part of it. He doesnt sound right, your opinion is right, but at that age, or any age., love is blind. I do think 18 is too young for her boyf to spend every night, im 26 and still not allowed share a bed in my parents house, and i respect their decision, its their house (altho i have a 7yr old, i still wont disobey them) maybe just mention the contraception thing, as that would be worse for a baby to be born into a situation where the father is unstable... hope this helps