I have a first date scheduled with somebody i met online. They were very straightforward with me from the beginning and told me that they were a recovering alcoholic, going to aa meetings, etc. I like to drink socially. Is it inappropriate to order, say a glass of wine, with dinner?
That being said...if there is chemistry, does that mean i'm doomed to a life of no drinking?
WOMBAT, Manliness Expert
Favorite Answer
Yes, that would be pretty rude and inconsiderate of you, don't you think?
Helen W.
As a recovered alcoholic who has experience with dating non-alcoholics, I've got to tell you, this question blows my mind.
This is a human being you are talking about here. Recovered people are just like you. What would you want in the same situation? You would want to be ASKED. "Hey, does it bother you if I have a glass of wine.?"
The person will probably say "NO"...because he or she is probably used to the fact that most people do drink...and truly, most recovered people are not "tempted" by this. Heck, what kind of recovery would it be if we had to walk around our whole lives avoiding situations where someone might drink?
Anonymous
It's not a good idea. As other people have pointed out it's rather rude to do that, particularly on a first date.
Wait until you actually get to know this person and have gone an a few dates with them and then ask them if it would bother them if you order a glass of wine. Maybe they will be okay with it, maybe not. But the only way you will know is to actually talk with them about it at some point.
Maria M
I think that you should show that you support them, even if its your first date. Dont order a glass of wine, instead order something that has no alcohol, that way they dont feel weird not being able to drink. It will help them have a beter first impression of you and more likely to want to go out again. After the first few dates thenI would ask them if they thought ti was something they would be ok with, if they say yes then I would limit the amount of alcohol to a very small amount. Keep them in mind, they may be out in the open about their problem but try to make them feel like you understnad even though you may not
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