Do AP's really want amended birth certificates for their kids?
I was told once a nature mum commented at an adoption conference that "all adoptive parents want it thats why it is." Not true, no one asked this generation what we think about it and no one asked me! All those decisions were made before I was born.
The only thing I can see that it began happening was because of name changes and legal aspects. Surely there has to be another way to recognise this.
And to add to the question. IF a person choses to change their name legally, do they have their birth certificate amended to accomodate the new first name? (If not why do adoptee's have to have all their information changed?)
2009-01-08T04:58:20Z
Our kids kept their first names, by law we can't keep the surname even if we wanted to.
2009-01-08T04:59:10Z
Our adoption was done under current Autralian local state laws.
2009-01-08T13:41:43Z
Cathrl69- I have had that pointed out on several occasions. Thats why its so hard to find an altenative because its up our kids to tell people they are adopted, not to be displayed for nosy people. Or private information being sighted by someone and then them saying..."I know that person I didn't know she gave up a baby all those years ago."
2009-01-08T13:43:55Z
Gypsy- In nsw Aust you soon will, (OBC)it will be made availble to birth parents from time they are born. Just changed in legislation, but it takes a few months for it to become active.
2009-01-08T13:49:52Z
I actually have all the information that would be printed on the original BC. The relationship between us and my kids Nparents has become more comfortable in the past few months. Once I have clarity on the availabilty of the OBC I might see if she wants to apply for it...(Hopefuly she photo copy it for the kids too, since we still won't be able to access it.)
2009-01-09T14:15:18Z
Maybe- that also bring another aspect into the debate- Men still need women when it comes to babies being produced. Some facts you can't hide from no matter how much you want equal rights to a kid. (And no I'm not against gay couples...)
gypsywinter2009-01-08T05:27:17Z
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""But I'd want the original one too, for her.""
So would I...as the natural mother of my child. I am not allowed by law to have my daughter's OBC, when at that time I was my daughter's one and only legal mother.
I think one of the most ludicrous things about an Amended Birth Certificate..is that the adoptive mother's name is inserted as the name of the woman who gave birth to this child. How on earth did law makers feel this was proper and even legal to do? Listing the name of a woman as giving birth, when in medical fact she did not! And if adoption is the best of all possible worlds...why would any adoptive mother/parent who willingly chose adoption, be ashamed of that verifable, legal fact and want to intentionally hide it?
I'm still mulling this one over. I haven't thought much about it before, to be honest. My first reaction, is No. Not when the adoptee is still a minor. The records belong to the adoptee, with access by the legal parents (which would be the adoptive parents). I don't think it's any different than any other kind of privacy. I don't think that the natural family should automatically have access to the minor adoptee's medical records, school records, etc. I do think the threat of identity theft is valid, but that's not the most compelling reason. When the adoptee becomes an adult, then he/she can allow whomever he/she wants to have access to those records. If there is a question of coersion, however, I think the natural parents should have a legal route available, in order to access the records. Such as, being able to file a petition in a court of law. ETA: Mamakate, read up on identity theft. You'd be surprised what someone can do with a birth certificate.
I did not expect or want an amended BC. As others have stated, I do not need it to feel "more like a mommy" and it is really silly. Everyone knows that I did not give birth, no matter what it says on the certificate.
What I *would* like, is proof of the child's identity/proof of my ability to make decisions on my child's behalf that is commonly acceptable. Right now, that appears to be a BC. (I've tried to use our adoption certificate to sign my son up for things and it is *not* accepted as proof of age even though his birthdate is on it. I have to show a BC anyway.) And, when I do show the adoption certificate, everyone gets in a flurry about how to handle it. It's just easier to show the BC and be done with it -- and my son prefers it too. (He doesn't want the extra attention. Our adoption is by no means a secret, but it doesn't necessarily need to be shared with the guy who's confirming eligibility for youth hockey either.)
Perhaps in this day and age -- with so many "non traditional" family types -- we need a new form, separate from the BC, which can serve as proof of name/age for children and proof of which adult(s) are legally able to make decisions on the child's behalf. Then everyone would have the same thing...regardless of their family situation.
We should make the BC *only* what it says it is -- documentation of the birth. Right now, at least in the USA, it's much more than that.
Name changes can be handled without amending a BC. The name of the parents is what is changed...after all in most cases a BC is the only document showing who is the legal parent of any child. You have to show it to enroll kids in school, sometimes in sports, to travel, and it is needed to get other forms of ID when one is older such a driver's license or passport. If they used their OBC, they would then have to show an adoption or guardianship cert to prove legal parent/guardianship.
I can understand that not everyone would want a different document than everyone else, detailing their adoptee status, when they are using it for these purposes (I mean why should the guy at the DMV need to you you were adopted? Would that open one up to awkward questions or conversations?)...but currently that is the document used.
I would much prefer ALL children/parents be issued a different document. Like a child's state issued ID showing the names of their legal parents/guardians (for school enrollment and travel purposes) and their birthdate to prove age. Those are the only purposes served.
BC's should be filed to record the birth only and not used as ID and never touched or needed again. Luckily DS's first mom did get a copy of his OBC sent to her, and is keeping it for him.
In short, no I didn't want an amended BC, but I also don't want my son to have to unwillingly reveal his adopted status to random strangers. I would prefer some other form of ID.
No, I have no desire for an amended birth certificate for my child as an adoptive parent. That whole concept seems really screwed up to me. I think that birth records should not be changed, and should reflect how things truly were at the time of birth, not custody changes that came later. A separate certificate of adoption would be sufficient to cover the legalities of proving custody-- there's no need to change or seal the birth records.
I think whether the child's surname is changed is an individual family decision (my preference would be to add the adoptive surname to the end of the existing name,) but there's no reason to change the record of the birth to accommodate a name change that came later, regardless.