It just seems like I see more huge families through adoption. I'm truly just perplexed why, if this is true.
2009-01-17T12:41:23Z
Everyone's answers ALL make sense and I appreciate them all -
except Janep556 - huh??? not relevent. we're not talking about who loves more here...that would be stupid and I would never insinuate one way or the other.
I can also appreciate the bottomless heart, but I also kind of feel yucky about huge families like Erin does and think there comes a point where quality and safety diminish, or older siblings have to becomes parents...
I also wonder, like was it Kateiskate (? - you can't see the answers in this add details form) if it is more of a christian/not christian thing more than an adopted thing?
Ok - keep up any enlightening answers - I really am just curious.
StayAtHomeMomOnTheGo2009-01-17T04:15:01Z
Favorite Answer
SOME adoptive families are "way larger" than 'normal', and some biological families are "way larger" than 'normal'. I also know some families that only have one biological chlid, and families that only have one adopted child. It is an individual thing, not a blanket that covers all adoptive families.
I think a lot of families that adopt to have large families. I have 8 brothers and sisters that are adopted, and 2 biological. I am the youngest birth, and my parents decided to adopt 1 or 2. If other people are anything like they are then once you start adopting you cant stop. We adopted my brother who is now 16 when he was 3, and then my other little brother who is 11 when he was 1 1/2. then we adopted a sibling group of 4 who were 9, 7, 4 and 2. My parents said they were done after that. Then the sibling groups birth mom had a baby and we took her at 8 days. Then one of my other brothers birth mom had a baby and we took her at 2 months. It is definitely an addicting thing, and I say as long as the adoptive parents can deal with all the issues that come along with it, and are willing to spend time with them, adopt as many kids as you can care for! Everyone deserves a chance to have a loving family!! Oh and we are Christians! if that helps at all...
I have seen some very large adoptive families, or more accurately the children in the large families I know are some adopted and some biological, which I guess is the reason the families are large. The parents of these large families I know had a biological family, decided later in life they wanted more children, so they did a second round of raising kids by adopting. I worry about large families, especially ones with older parents. I feel yucky when I see really large biological families, too. I think it's not good enough for children to be raised by older siblings instead of parents, since parents can't possibly give each child in a family that large the attention they need.
There are some families that are large because of adoption. We have six. Three bio and Three adopted.
The thing you will often see in larger adoptive families is that they will adopt "less desirable" children. They often adopt special needs, siblings, or from foster care.
The main reason why most of the people I know who have large families that were built through adoption is because they allowed themselves to be confronted with reality the lost and hurt child faced.
They didn't hide in some college office writing op-eds for the Washington Post. They didn't attend UN conferences in 5-star hotels while the locals were starving.
Most of the larger adoptive families I know had no intention of being a "huge" family. They saw the need and attempted to fill it. Then they saw the need again and again. I can assure you when our family has healed enough to give more children a family we will grow.
I guess it's probably just people who want larger families, perhaps came from larger families, and they happen to have adopted children. I have 4 kids, which I guess alot of people would consider a larger family. Three of my kids are bio, and our youngest daughter was adopted from China a year and a half ago. I know I want to adopt again, because of the huge blessing this little girl has been to our family. So it may be that families have wonderful experiences with adoption and want to adopt again. I also think it would help my daughter from China to perhaps have a sibling from China, or a sibling who is adopted. I guess I have no idea if that is true (she's only 3 so she can't really tell me) so maybe I should ask the adoptees out there.....I'll have to post the question!