VERY SERIOUS, PLEASE ONLY HONEST REPLIES(MEN PLEASE MAKE SUGGESTIONS, PLEASE)?
I AM A WOMAN IN MY EARLY 40'S & BEEN MARRIED FOR 9 YRS & FOR THE PAST FEW YEARS, I BELIEVE IT HAS BEEN A LITTLE OVER 3 YEARS, BUT HE WOULD SAY 1.5. MARRIAGE HAS GONE DOWN HILL. I FEEL LIKE HIS FRIEND, NOT WIFE. WE LIVE AS B/F'S.(BEST FRIENDS THAT ARGUE ALMOST EVERY NIGHT) SAME BED RM, WAKE UP 2GETHER, GO ABOUT OUR DAY,LIVE 2GETHER,LIKE FRIENDS SNUGGLE @ NIGHT, WE ARGUE, SERIOUSLY ABOUT 6 OUT OF 7 NIGHTS. HE SAYS I TWIST THINGS, BLAME HIM. HE SAYS HE IS TRYING, BUT HOW CAN A MAN TRY IF THEY DON'T EVEN HAVE SEX W/THEIR WIFE? AND NOW I AM AT THE POINT OF FRUSTRATION AND I AM A SAD, LONELY, FRUSTRATED, AND ALMOST TO THE POINT, I DON'T CARE IF I EVER HAVE SEX OR AN ORGASM AGAIN, (ORGASM AS IN BY MYSELF INDULGENCE, AND I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT. I KNOW PEOPLE SAY, "IF THEY R NOT GETTING IT @ HOME THEY R GETTING IT SOMEWHERE, BUT HONESTLY, I DON'T THINK HE IS. HE SWEARS HE HAS AND WILL BE ALWAYS FAITHFUL, I DON'T EVEN HAVE A DOUBT THAT HE ISN'T, I JUST CAN'T UNDERSTAND. I GOT VERY SICK 4 YRS AGO AND THINGS HAVE NEVER BEEN THE SAME, HE SAYS, NO WAY, THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO W/IT. BUT HE CAN BE LIKE A B/F YOU COULD EVER HAVE, HE STOOD BY MY SIDE THROUGH ALL SURGERIES/MAJOR FAMILY ISSUES (NOT US), MY FAMILY.
I TOLD HIM I HAVE GAVE ALL I CAN GIVE, I EVEN WENT AND BOUGHT ONE OF THOSE VERY SEXY RED NIGHTIES THAT WOMEN WHERE ON XMAS NIGHT AND HE THOUGHT IT WAS SO CUTE, BUT IT DIDN'T GO NO WHERE NOT EVEN ON OUR ANNIVERSARY OR NEW YEARS EVE., I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE. I AM TOTALLY LOST. THIS IS MY 2ND MARRIAGE AND THE LAST ONE I WALKED OUT, DUE TO ALCOHOLISM, (BAD). THIS IS DIFFERENT. I TRY, I FAIL, I EVERY NIGHT HE COMMENTS ON SOMETHING ABOUT ME, BUT THEN SAYS I NEVER EVER TELL YOU IT IS YOUR FAULT OR U R DOING SOMETHING WRONG, I AM AT WITS END. I JUST SIT AND CRY AND CRY. I TELL HIM HE IS THE KEY TO MY HAPPINESS AND HE SAYS, I AM HERE, U NEED TO TRY, OMG, I HAVE FOR SO LONG NOW. HE SAYS, WHY DO U CRY ALL THE TIME? I JUST NOW, LOOK AT HIM AND HE SAYS, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH., U R A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN AND I WANT OUR MARRIAGE TO WORK, BUT WE LIVE AS FRIENDS THAT FIGHT EVERY NIGHT THEN GO TO BED AND SNUGGLE AND WAKE UP AND DO IT AGAIN. NIGHT AFTER NIGHT AFTER NIGHT....
JUST NOW, I WAS TRYING TO EAT SOMETHING AND GOT KIND OF SICK AND HE COULD TELL I AM UPSET, WE WERE ARGUING EARLIER(WHATS NEW RIGHT) AND HE SAYS, WHAT IS WRONG, R U UPSET ABOUT SOMETHING, I SAID YEH, U. HE SAYS, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING I SAID YEH I KNOW, NOTHING, RIGHT AND I SAID I AM SO TIRED OF LIVING LIKE THIS, NOT A REAL MARRIAGE, HE SAYS, YES IT IS AND WE NEED TO TRY. WELL, OMG, WHAT DOES HE THINK I HAVE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST FEW YEARS. AND NOW HE SAYS WE SHOULD TRY???????I AM TOTALLY CONFUSED.
I DON'T THINK I CAN TRY AGAIN, I FEEL LIKE I SHOULD JUST SHUT MY MOUTH, TELL HIM YES, U R RIGHT AND I ACKNOWLEDGE WHAT U R SAYING AND I AM SORRY. (THAT IS WHAT I TELL HIM ALL THE TIME, SO HE WILL STOP THE ARGUMENT THAT WE R IN), BUT I FEEL DIFFERENT, LIKE MAYBE SEPARATE BEDROOMS?? HE DON'T WANT TO. SO, THIS IS IT. I HAVE TO LIVE LIKE THIS FOREVER, U SEE, I HURT MY EX, VERY BADLY WHEN I LEFT HIM AND WENT ON W/MY LIFE W/MY KIDS (THERE WERE SERIOUS PROBLEMS, NO ABUSE THOUGH), BUT I FEEL NOW THAT I AM PAYING FOR WHAT I DID TO ANOTHER PERSON. AND I DO NOT WANT TO HURT ANOTHER HUMAN LIKE THAT EVER AGAIN. SO MAYBE, WHAT DOES GO AROUND, DOES COME AROUND, I DON'T KNOW, WHAT WOULD U DO IF U WERE ME? PLEASE THINK FOR A MINUTE AND PLEASE BE HONEST.....
PS, SORRY, 4 THE GRAMMAR, I TYPED VERY FAST TO SEND THIS OUT!