I am 25...unmarried, in a relationship for almost 3 years with a 21 year old. if i am not married by now...?

should i move on? we have a gorgeous little girl together. we have a few kinks in our relationship (my jealousy because i think i'm ugly)...i love him to pieces. i have never met someone like him before, i don't even look at other men sexually because i love him so much. well, if he hasn't asked me by now or 5 years, should i move on? everyone i know is either getting married or got married right out of highschool. so i kinda feel like an ugly loser...no matter what my friends like they are married, ugly , pretty, fat, thin, obese...and no matter what the act like. mean, nice, sweet, manipulative....all are engaged or married. could i not be asked yet because i am so ugly that he is embarrassed to wanna marry me? he said just go with the flow think of now instead of the future, and stop tripping on it. he said he is only 21 he wants to get married when he has a better job, etc. but for some reason i don't believe it?

my ex i dated before him said he didn't want to get married for a long while (i never pushed it or said i wanted to) and told me if i want to be with him i need to understand that, then we broke up and he dated a girl for 8 months and they got married.

should i move on? or should i just give up?

2010-06-02T00:59:01Z

peggy that was SELFISH of me? do you think it would have been better if i didn't accept i made a mistake and instead of have her and love her and do anything in the world for her, that i just ABORTED her?

2010-06-02T01:00:25Z

peggy whoooo said we live separately? stop acting like you read what i wrote and actually read it next time?

2010-06-02T01:10:01Z

TIM uh why don't you shut up and READ i said i love him to pieces i guess that means something different in your tiny little brain? look yeah i know lots of guys love ugly chicks but not ME i do not love MYSELF

2010-06-02T01:10:39Z

and TIM she was unplanned im just not a baby killer like you probably would be !

LoveTinsley2010-06-02T00:58:08Z

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Well first. You have to realise that he is 21. That still really young to get married or even have a child! Also where I come from the average age to get married is around 27, and thats considered young.You still have two years to go. Your still starting your life. Maybe he wants to be in the perfect situation to get married and finally settle down instead of worrying so much about not having anough money. If he loves you the same way you love him then he will look past your 'ugliness' I'm sure your not even ugly!! Also he would never have a child with you if he didnt love you. So just wait a while. He is still extremely young and so are you. I'm sure he will pop the question soon!! Trust me!!
xx

?2010-06-02T02:12:24Z

Haaaaaaa beauty is only skin deep but, ugly is to the bone. If this younger guy has hung out with you this long he SEES your beauty.

True beauty comes from within! Now, on his behalf he is still pretty young yet. However, I've got kids this age and don't understand them or this generation to be honest with you. I was married at 19 and had 5 kids by the time I was as old as my oldest son is now and he is still just living with a girl.

If you'll allow me to just be flat out blunt with you from what you said this could be your fault and you brought this on yourself. You set yourself up for a fall but, there is a way to make it end the way you want also, if you are willing to make a few changes.

Here's two big problems you need to over come. Number 1 you think of yourself as ugly and you can't afford to do that! Sure just maybe you're not a miss America but, you were still cute enough to attract him! Number 2 guys want to marry someone younger then they are.

The good news is you still have a very good chance to over come these minor issues if you are willing. All you have to do is make him feel like a man and make yourself irreplacable in the process.

If you are really serious and want to marry this guy I'll leave you a couple of links to check out but, if you'll spend some time on this site you will learn a lot reading other posts too.

?2010-06-02T01:15:32Z

i dont really see a problem here other than u..
there is no need for a marriage if both of you are already committed.
marriage is just a papaer taht will bind you 2 by law.. which can be broken at any time.
once a couple feels that they are one.. its more than enough.
i have known many couples live together and have kids.. for ova 20 years..
they have never been married nor plan to.. because they dont see a point in
being with someone if there is only a paper holding them together..
a bond is strong wether if u sign the paper or not.. so quit dreaming that
marriage is the only way to keep a man... even after marriage if u disrespect him..
he will still leave u.. so think about it..

Beth2010-06-02T01:47:46Z

Why do you even ask about moving on? So what if other people are getting married. A wedding ceremony isn't a true indicator of a successful relationship. Grow up. Pick your self esteem up off the floor and appreciate your man and child. Everything isn't about you anymore. Be happy. Good luck.

Bomfy2010-06-02T00:55:36Z

You sound like you are happy with him and things are going great, right?

You are not defined by the fact that you are married or not.

There is no marriage expiration date either.

Carry on and wait until the time is right for both of you. You will see a bunch of your firend ger divorces because they rushed into it and blah blah blah.

Lastly marriage is not the be all and end all, there are many other things to accomplish in life besides getting married.

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