Toddler showing autism symptoms?
I'm concerned about my two and a half year old son. I know all children develop at their own rate but I can't help but be concerned. He shows numerous "warning signs": limited vocabulary, anti-social around other kids, walks on tip toes, has weird tendencies (shakes when he's upset or just stares, pulls out arm/leg/face hair, etc.), uses my hands as tools to get what he wants instead of asking for it, gets very upset if things aren't done exactly as he wants them, seems deaf at times, VERY picky eater, etc. My 21 month old cousin and even my 11 month old daughter seem to be developing much quicker than he has (I don't mean they're ahead of him, but developed at a notably faster speed than he has so far). I've spoken with his pedi a number of times about my concerns but she chalks it up to him being very stubborn. She says that if he we still have concerns by his 3 yr check up, she'll do some diagnostic questionnaires. I really want to get a second opinion but my partner thinks we should give him until his 3 yr check-up to "bloom".
I'm looking for your opinions on whether or not you would get the second opinion. I don't see the harm in it but for some reason (denial, fear?) my SO is adamantly against it. Also, if you're the parent or know an autistic toddler, what his/her behavior around this age? Lastly, if you have a toddler at all or spent ample amount of time with one, what was their behavior around this age?
Thank you very much and I appreciate all responses!
I also forgot to mention he shows a lot of regressions, which I've read is a strong autism indicator. He learn new things and then a week, a few days or even hours later seems to totally forget it and never do it again.