What to do about this girl?

I met this girl a few months ago in school and we really like each other. She is 21 and I am 27. The problem is that she says she still loves her ex even though she doesn't really want to be with him, and so she won't date me. He has been in the military for five years and she says he treats her like crap. He ignores her and just wants to sleep with her when he's in town. So why doesn't she forget him? I'm a great guy and have been holding out for the right girl for 3 years, and I think she's the one. We went out tonight and got slightly drunk. Had a great convo as always. She let me try braiding her hair and we smoked menthols because she likes cigarettes when she's drunk. We just seem to be really happy together, so I don't understand why she isn't getting over him. I'll give her more time, but I don't want to wait years. She is very special to me. Will she ever come around, or is this a lost cause?

Starrgirl2012-06-13T03:18:50Z

Favorite Answer

If that's her only reason, you need to shake it up! It sounds like you have fallen into a pattern of behavior that you're not happy with, and you shouldn't have to wait years to be happy. Make a grand gesture that changes your relationship and lets her know how you feel. Be passionate but not volatile. Every woman secretly wants to be romanced, especially if they've been with (what seems like) a jerk.

Before you do this, make sure she is the one, because once you do it's VERY hard, if not impossible, to go back. Or depending on your personality just dive in, you only live once. Either way you deserve to be happy for as much of that as you can!

Sam2012-06-13T10:13:56Z

That's just how it is sometimes - because she keeps him in her life she can't get him out of her heart, no matter how badly he treats her. She's likely clinging to the love that they once had. If you can convince her to stay away from him then you may have a chance, but you're going to have to step up.

Chanel2012-06-13T10:12:04Z

You might be a good guy but potentially she isn't attracted to you in a physical way because you aren't her physical type...
You need to do an HONEST assessment of how you look compared to the guy she's lusting after. Guys tend to see themselves as gorgeous when they're not- so minus a few points from the original score you gave yourself haha.

Anonymous2012-06-13T10:48:09Z

people remember what they have already loose they can't see what is near to them. If you also go far from her , she will miss u too then him.