Direct Saturn Transits Versus Saturn Retrograde Transits?

For some reason I've actually felt more affected by Saturn Retrograde transits, than direct. This is how I was affected by Saturn in Scorpio moving Rx, before it even became exact with my Scorpio MC of 11.47 and flew backwards. I didn't notice much of Saturn's warnings that you're running out of time, until it reached Rx. I finally, sort of anyway, taken several steps away from the "haze". I'm actually taking notice of bad habits and correcting them, however it's sort of like the "10 steps backwards and 1 step forward" thing...like four or five-six months before.
Now I'm up all night, and pretty upset with myself on what I believe in and don't know where to go. I actually wonder about Church, but I'm uneasy about really communicating with somebody...that i'll just end up just going along with it or getting along with others for the sake of it not much else--like going there is more likely a waste, maybe even a cover-up that things are getting better.

I'm actually a Saturn dominant and Cap rising you'll see with my chart. Why do you think I was more susceptible to Rx than direct anyway?

http://i1292.photobucket.com/albums/b568/EllenMAK/astro_2gw_02_bobbius_corwen_hp4261616265_zps0383af7a.gif

2013-06-04T05:32:19Z

I also don't know how to relate to people and where I stand with them, I have this neurosis over the majority versus minority sort of thing. It crops up every now and then, but then I feel great allofasudden that I can do anything and life has too much to offer...and then the bullshit comes back. I'm just glad my family still loves me, and my dad and I are actually coming along a little. In his own way and mine, but he's still confusing sometimes.

Jana2013-06-04T19:56:43Z

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My sister (the certified astrologer) was born Oct 29th :) many years earlier though. I'm not a Professional astrologer, but have learned to locate certain things-or notice areas that stand out Your Saturn square Sun and Saturn opposite your Moon don't make it "easy" for you-but you have some dynamic aspects that will shine through, no matter what you decide to do. One of the reasons our first years are so difficult (in my opinion) is because we are controlled and regulated by our environment...and know very little (consciously) of what is "out there" waiting for us.

With Saturn said to represent our karma;ie restrictions, responsibility....along with other things-You have it going at your feelings AND your ego. I see this as challenging, more than hopeless or impossible-but it does explain why you would have those ups and downs.

"that i'll just end up just going along with it or getting along with others for the sake of it not much else-" You have a lot of aspects that would make it unlikely that you will "go along" when it really matters..such as: Mars/Jupiter sextile and Mars/Uranus sextile. Jupiter in Virgo would explain..or contribute to your moments of feeling conformity.

Your Sun in the ninth H indicates the need for some relationship with church/religion/spiritual "studies." Going to many different churches would be a good way to start-Find one where you feel comfortable-or something happens where you feel they have responded to your presence, and reached out to you. You'll know when you have found a place you'll grow with, as well as find people with whom you can relate.

I used to like the "Church of Religious Sciences" in Chicago. The minister was so good at what I feel a minster "should" be. Not "Christian Science" (quite different), but "Religious Science." It incorporates the power of prayer, reincarnation and positive affirmations, etc...not just dogma...if you are comfortable with dogma-fine-just look around. The Church I went to was filled with previously discouraged Catholics, looking for something more.

South Node in the sixth, in Cancer make it too comfortable for you to rely on security of home. You will be happiest when you allow yourself the freedom of taking on the challenges of life, and feeling the courage and tenacity that is with-in you. Sun square Saturn also bring on feelings of melancholy..
and the Opposite Moon/Saturn.

Jupiter trine Uranus are a real asset, and again, not found in one who sits back and stays quiet. You have a lot of indications of creativity-and must be artistic? Pluto/Mercury in Scorpio in the ninth, again show an interest with spirituality-and this would be good to start focusing. sharing and channeling in the most beneficial or spiritual way.

@as you get older-have more experience, I hope you will learn how to be yourself. and not be concerned at where "You stand" with others. They really don't matter-such concerns will only keep you where you are and can be so stifling. Loved ones and family only want what's best, for us to be our best-if they love us...You have so much going for you, get the best out of yourself and you'll find yourself in the presence of those who appreciate that person.

shinaberry2016-08-10T06:43:28Z

There may be so much happening isn't there. The grand trine is a part of the kite formation all specializing in Uranus in aries in his sixth house. That is first-rate for brand new revolutionary ideas and perhaps new ways of watching at things however he could also be slightly accident prone. The Uranus/Pluto rectangular is a bit of a fear however unluckily this side has been round for most of the 12 months so plenty of youngsters are going to grow up with this. With the t-square involving the sun it is going to supply a quality wish for independence and the want to gain this at any cost. Fortunately he has Saturn practically his Ascendant in order that should convey some calming influences and with Venus, (the chart ruler) in Libra and within the 1st house should support as good; he should be a bit of a charmer and will ordinarily be really just right watching bit probably a little critical. The yod you observed suggests he has abundant vigour to grow and prosper but he'll ordinarily to find it elaborate to genuinely plot a direction to move on. He could consider that the higher the difficulty the more cash you need to throw at it; he must most likely be positive but perhaps a bit too materialistic. His Jupiter/Pluto trine is exceptional because it offers a strong religion that may outcome in his desires for independence and alter being prompted in significant ways. The father is on the whole slightly on the robust part and the baby must inherit this trait as good. The mummy, father and child must all get along good although, (astrologically). As for grants; some thing to do with journey and study can be great for the mum and anything in green or blue for the youngster; Librans love antiques and historic things frequently so might be a variety of installed newspaper of the day of birth to be saved for future instances for him.

Chris Q.T.2013-06-04T05:49:20Z

i'm no astrologer, so i'm clueless about transits and retro's

but look at your Cancer Moon & it's aspects
& look at your Virgo Venus & it's aspects
also check out your Lilith (these three placements are important & tell a lot about your past lives & how It affects you & how it can benefit your present)
you can talk to your future selfs/lives, and past lives, Simply ask & your heart will tell you what you need to know, p.s. since you are co-creator like God Your Future SELF IS WHOEVER you believe it to be, imagine yourself! & it is created, all you have to do is follow that great vision like Alexander the Great lol

follow your highest joy, follow the obvious of your highest joy
smile through all the bullshit -tupac (that's a short part of his quote LOL but it helps)

i'm also supposing you're religious for going to church

did you know prayer is just appreciating what you have in the present & it is the present that's all that matters

everything in the present in perfectly aligned/signed/in agreement/ planned, it's perfectly in line/alined to HAPPEN TO YOU for your SOUL's experience as a CREATOR in the physical plane just as powerful as God (For you are Him, apart of God)

YOU ARE ALL THAT matters not what anyone's beliefs are YOU & YOUR GREATEST VISIONS AND your Soul's journey is all that matters
your Soul is put on Earth for the most SIMPLEST & MOST BEAUTIFULLEST REASON
& You yourself choose what reason that is, you can find out that reason by looking within your heart
& you yourself can change it during your physical lifetime

Life is truly SIMPLE, don't give up haha, i'm a light-worker, no greater & no less than any Soul, i'm just more awaken lol (doesn't make a difference) because everyone on this Earth has the same duty of

transforming the new Karma Of Energy God sends out to expand His Grand & ever-growing Universe
to show it's infinity, for That's His way showing His Love to His children, God's gift is THIS EVER-EXPANDING UNIVERSE

Edit: to share my own God's message He has told my Heart's core (His message is personal & only the individual can discover God's unique message for their own Soul, for He is You, He is with you, He is guiding you as a FATHER that HE ISSS!)
well HE, God tells me I am the greatest lover alive in the Universe (I lost my train of thought but anyway) haha..wait I'm back on track lol as God's greatest lover alive..I've learned from the 1st day He told me this or experienced being, awakening to my Soul finally being who it it=the greatest lover alive, that LIFE IS FLEETING
Greatness is also Lonely for GREATNESS comes with SACRIFICE
PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT YOU SACRIFICE VERY WELL!!

and my message for you is that there is no OUTSIDE world, it is not real, it is your consciousness showing you what's inside of your consciousness lol & what your Soul wants to experience about your consciousness, to correct things on your path or ANYTHING YOU ARE A CO-CREATOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you can Create ANYTHING YOU WANT!!!!!

your individual path matters, not me, not EVEN GOD, YOU, God wants you to feel special because you are & not many people understand God truly, Life is God's gift for your Soul, your Soul agreed / God to be here in the physical plane
your Soul will remember this Life Experience on Earth MAKE every PRESENT MOMENT WORTH LIVING

I myself am just in your conscious telling you TO WAKE UP!!! hahaha & you will split into your own parallel reality & I will split into my own in this INFINITE UNIVERSE OF GOD's
EVERY SOUL HAS THEIR UNIVERSE OF THEIR OWN