What do I do about my boyfriend's horrible temper?

Question

I love my boyfriend and we have a lot of amazing times together. He's no doubt my best friend in the whole world. The only problem is, he has a horrible temper that I honestly just can't stand sometimes. We used to be engaged, and we had ONE fight, and he freaked out, demanded I give him back my engagement ring, and he left for 3 days. He eventually came back around and apologized for what he did, but I don't think he realizes that his temper tantrums actually do hurt me, and kind of make me paranoid that he's going to lash out at any second.

Currently he is not talking to me because his Xbox headset wont work? Uh, yeah. Not even kidding. His headset won't work, and he blamed me for breaking it (even though I've never touched it), threw it across the room and it hit the wall hard. He let out a few F bombs, and just freaked out.

Hasn't talked to me for 5 hours. Now he's mad that his mom won't get him a loan for a car. So he's not talking to her OR me.

He can just be very immature sometimes, and it honestly just disgusts me. How do I address this? I do love him, and I do want our relationship to work, but this needs to change before I can make any sort of long term commitment to him. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!

Tom · Answer

He's a baby.  When he doesn't get what he wants and when people don't do what he wants, he throws a fit.  Simple as that.  His parents made some horrible mistakes in raising him because likely this type of behavior has worked for him over the years.  The fact that he'd even expect his mom to get him a car loan proves to me that he has been spoiled way too much.

If you marry this guy you can expect your life to be a living hell.  He will continue to have temper tantrums as long as the people around him allow him to be that way.  I would suggest that YOU stop talking to HIM instead of the other way around.  Applogizing is not good enough anymore.  He has to prove over time that he is working past his issues.  I'm guessing that if you even suggested that he has problems that he has to work on, that would spark another tantrum.  You need to figure out what it is about you that causes you to allow someone to treat you this way even once.

Anonymous · Answer

Honestly, you need to tell him to get professional help before he lashes out and possibly hurts you.  If he&#x27;s already blaming you for something you had absolutely nothing to do with there is definitely a problem.  Before you even think about making any type of commitment to him&#x2F; the relationship he needs to fix his temper.

Darla · Answer

My advice would be to move on. You do not want to spend the rest of your life with this type of temper. And he is not going to change! So ease out of this relationship, go it alone for a bit, and I bet you a real nice guy will come along!

Anonymous · Answer

Nothing you could do to change his temper as it's already a part of who he is. Maybe need to back off a little and make him feel that your presence is drifting away..that might change his anger management a bit.

What do I do about my boyfriend's horrible temper?

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