I'm in a committed relationship and all of a sudden?

Question

the guy is getting custody of his children. I do not want anymore children. Mine are long grown and left home. I don't want to be the Mommy cause I'm not the mommy and I don't want to be the wife. I simply like being the mistress. He already has a wife. He did not ask for custody...CPS involved etc. I think this will be a deal breaker for me. I will give it a try but I want to continue my life as it is. I hike @ 25 miles a week. And I can't do that if I'm stuck babysitting his children. Would it be wrong of me to say...I'm getting my own place, we can continue to date..but I'm moving out. That way I'm not stuck into the Mommy/wife role? Your opinions please.

2013-11-22T14:15:50Z

When I met him, we lived 1500 miles away from his children...so I considered that safe.. His children never visited...not even once. Then we moved @ 250 miles away from his kids and he only got them 1x a month. Ok I could deal with that. But now to have them full time all the time. I just don't want that responsibility.

? · Answer

If you are so against it - then don't do it.  Wouldn't be fair to him, the children.  Or you.

You will just become more resentful and will, somehow, take it out on him and the children.

So move out.  Tell him you are willing to still see him.  But you don't want to take care of a family any more.

It's neither right nor wrong - how you feel.  It is what it is.

Bentley · Answer

You should never have moved in with a man with children with these strong feelings.  It is your life.  But try to make the transition easy for him due to the huge stress he will have being a single father all of a sudden.

Schuyler · Answer

This is a disaster waiting to happen. You need to move out ASAP and limit any visits that include his kids. You will now be second fiddle to the kids so you need to either accept that or move on and frankly, you'd be better off moving on to someone single.

Tiger by the Tail · Answer

Find someone else & be that guy's mistress then.  Kids will always come first and he will always have things going on with them and they WILL take priority over you.

? · Answer

you raised your kids and you are done, just be honest with him, you have the right to walk.  Better to be honest and go your separate ways than to stick it out and be miserable

I'm in a committed relationship and all of a sudden?

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