How do I suggest a polyamorous relationship to a married woman?

Question

Okay so this is one a hell of a pickle, much easier said than done.  I have come to know this one girl, whom I think is absolutely adorable.  She dj's at a club I frequent.  Whenever we meet up we have this great chemistry and always have a great time chatting with each other.  The problem she has a husband and child.  The idea of having an affair would only result in the people closest to her getting hurt and could very well ruin her marriage, assuming she's even open to such a thing.  So what's left?  Suggesting a polyamorous relationship.  So how do I make such a suggestion to her without sounding like a dirt bag?  Also assuming she would even be open to such a thing.

? · Answer

Don't suggest anything, see if you can kiss her without saying anything.

Foofa · Answer

I don't think you can suggest that without sounding like a dirt bag. When couples want to open their relationships they have to make the first move.

seedy history · Answer

It's a dirt bag thing to suggest. She's not made sexual moves on you and she HAS made vows to her husband and implied promises to her child.

Anonymous · Answer

If you feel that having an affair might ruin her marriage, then how would a Polyamorous relationship help?  Wouldn't it cause the marriage to break down?  If you were married, would you want some strange man to approach your wife to suggest to her a polyamorous relationship?  Wouldn't you feel a bit jealous?  If you are fine with this, then you should find a woman who is into that lifestyle.  Why take the chance of ruining someone's marriage?  If you succeed in ruining her marriage, then most likely she won't want to see nor speak to you again.  Dare you chance this?

Anonymous · Answer

The person to ask is her husband.  Tell him what you've told us.

How do I suggest a polyamorous relationship to a married woman?

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