why is having a lot of grit considered good? i find it destructive.?
Grit is overrated, especially in terms of its effect on your happyness, due to my extreme level of grit, I am always dissatisfied with myself unless i am the very very best at something.
If you are using "grit" to mean strength of character, that's a good thing for anyone to have. But it doesn't mean needing to be the best at everything. Being so competitive is self-destructive. It takes real strength of character to accept defeat, to accept that you may not be very good at something, that others may be a lot better than you at some skills and that you just may not be interested in a particular activity.
Having passion and perseverance for goals is good. But goals need to be realistic even if challenge goals as little higher. If missing a goal but tried your best is nor satisfactory, you may be right. You need to be smart enough when its time to let go.