How do you deal with sadness over things you can't change, like family issues?

BE PATIENCE, DO NOT POINT THEIR MISTAKES. ASK FORGIVENESS FOR THE ONE WHO IS MAKING THINGS HARD FOR OTHERS.

I once had an issue with a family member, and I don';t remember where I read this, but this trick helped me a lot:

Close your eyes and imagine that person standing in front of you. Imagine a beautiful white light coming from above and surrounding them. Tell them that you forgive them. That they hurt you, but you forgive them and that you will now continue with your life.

I don't usually do this kind of thing, but this really helped me see that I was hurt by someone who was childish and didn't mean harm, but did everything in the worst possible way.

So although this did not change them, it changed the way I looked at them, and that made things so much better.

I chose to accept the sadness. I had a lot of sadness over family issues for a long time. At last I realised I could fight against it and feel miserable, or I could look those sad feelings squarely in the face and recognise them.

When I decided to stop ignoring the sadness and recognised it, it became a part of life - a bitter part, but part of me, and part of who I am. Part of what made me the person who can deal with awful things and still come out thinking positively about myself.

I thought of the sadness as a small bird that lived in a cage in my chest, in my ribcage. It had a right to be there, and I decided to actively start protecting it. Feeling sad in response to the things that happened proved that I was human, and a good person, because it really is normal to be sad when sad things happen.

Your feelings have a right to exist. Think of it as something that is part of you, and something that is a valid response to whatever's happening. You can keep the sadness like a small bird in your chest. Take it out sometimes to look at it and hold it in your hand; give yourself permission to feel sad sometimes. But then, put the bird back in the cage; put it away, and get on with the business of trying to be a good, happy, able person.

Giving yourself permission to be sad sometimes makes it easier to strive for the peace and happiness you deserve at other times.

Trying to pretend it isn't there won't work. Take care of the small bird, it has a right to be there, but then put it away again.

knowing that you need to start healing is the first step. you have done all you can do. so its time to start thinking about "you" you are probally always have an ache in your heart over the situation/issues but as time goes on and you begin to heal the hurt pain will begin to heal. knowing that you have done all that you can its time to take that step minute by minute day by day. i hope this helps some. if you still feel hurt talking to someone you trust and respect also will help. take care!!!