What do you do when...?

I went through this type of situation myself a few years back. I had a friend that smoked pot, slept around, neglected her family, blew money, got drunk all the time, that sort of thing. I couldnt see that she was not good for me and when I finally did and cut things out with her things got so good with my husband and me. A few years back she came back into my life and once again I started hanging out with her again. My husband and I started having problems around the same time. The only advice I can give you is to do what my husband did. He would caution me about her influence but allow me to make my own decisions. Eventually I got the big picture and left well enough alone. I began seeing the destructive behavior that she exhibitted and the behavior that tolerated out of her. People like that always do the same thing. They eventually screw up really bad that the other person has no choice but see what they are really all about. Be there for your girl, caution her but trust her to make the right choices. If you try to force your views and beliefs on her she will only reject you and become bitter with you. By giving her room and allowing her to discover the triths on her own it will be a lesson learned for her in the end. If she stops hanging out with this person then she will always blame you for losing a friend. If the situation is too much for you to handle then you need to decide if this relationship is worth saving. If so allow time to take its course. If not then you need to explain to her that you cannot stand by and watch her destructive behavior any longer. That you only want the best for her and if she cannot see that this friendship will only end up hurting her you cannot stanf by and watch. That you love her to much to watch her do that to herself.

You cannot force this on her she will only pull away from you and pull closer to the friend. Remember: The father you push the harder she holds on.

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