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Are people that help you out a lot controling or just nice?

Some one who always offers to buy things for you or always just pops in with things for you. Also someone who is very nice is that in fact controling or just kind?

11 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    It depends how they approach you with these gifts. If they are sincere and really polite about it, they really like you and thats the only way they know how to express it. But if they are just sucking up or trying to barge in your life, then thats the person being stubborn about you, not so much as to be controlling( thats a pretty strong word for it).

  • 1 decade ago

    Depends on the person and the situation. There's definite motive behind those gestures. Maybe it is a thoughtful motive from the person. I do thoughtful things for my dear friends all the time, like bring them lunch or pop in to say hi and to ask how they are doing. I also know ofexperiences where someone who is interested in someone romantically will do nice things for the person they have interest in, like buy them gifts or pop in to say hi express their interest.

    Whatever the situation maybe, you have to ask yourself whether you want to entertain it or not. Kind gestures aren't always a form of controlling someone or trying to get their way with someone unless it's making someone uncomfortable, and this person has communicated it to the person doing the gestures, and it doesn't stop.

    I hope this is more of a pleasant surprise rather than a situation that you don't feel comfortable in. Good luck and best wishes.

    Source(s): myself
  • 1 decade ago

    If the person wants a romantic relationship with you then they are probably trying to get you to like them too. If not, it sounds like the person may have low self-esteem and feels they need to "buy" a friend. A very nice person may have no alternative motive however if they act that way with everyone, then it is probably their personality and accept it at face value. You would find out fast if they were trying to control you if you politely refuse a gift or gesture. If they react with anger then they were probably trying to control you. Alot depends on the situation. Good Luck...

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Hmmm never thought about it like that. I always assumed they were just nice, but on second though some are probably using it as a control lever.

    Give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they are just being nice.

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  • It goes either way. Sometimes i help someone to be in control of a situation so something doesn't go wrong or so that everything goes smoothly and how it's supposd to .

    Sometimes i help someone because it's the right thing to do, and i know that they would appreciate the help and i will love myself for it later.

  • 1 decade ago

    It depends on the person's motive. Now some people are just overly nice and like to help in any way possible, and then some people are just noisy and mischievous. You just have to pay close attention and decide which one is which

  • 1 decade ago

    Some times I help people because I am nice, other times because I have an altruistic motive. It is around 70%-30%.

  • 1 decade ago

    It depends on you and the person. If it's making you feel uncomfortable, you should talk to the person and say they are too nice. What's the situation? How long has this been happening? What's your relationship with this person like?

  • 1 decade ago

    lol. if they're like my older sister, then i would say controlling. she likes to do things for others but in return you have to do something back for her. she likes to help siblings even if we dont need the help because it makes her feel important and needed. but on the other hand, some people are genuinely kind.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    why would you make that mean they are controlling? are you controlling? are they asking for something in return when they give you something? If so....you dont have to give back..when people give something they shouldnt do it..because they want something back..if that is the case...then you have the choice to refuse or accept.

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