This one's good!?

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules:

Please note... these are all numbered '1' ON PURPOSE.

1. Breasts are for looking at, that is why we do it. Dont try to change that.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. Youre a big girl. If its up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You dont hear us complaining when you leave it down.

1. Saturday = sports. Its like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one.

- subtle hints do not work

! ; & nbsp; - strong hints do not work

- OBVIOUS hints do not work

- JUST SAY IT!

1. 'Yes' and 'no' are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. Thats what we do. Sympathy is what your friends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissable in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If you think youre fat, you probably are. Dont ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted in two ways, and one of them makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either tell us to do something, or how you want it done.

Not both.

If you already know best how to do it, do it yourself.

1. Christopher Collumbus did not need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit.

We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing", we will act like nothings wrong. We know you are lying but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you dont want an answer to, expect an answer you dont want to hear.

1. If we have to go out, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. You have enough clothes... you have too many shoes.

1. Dont try to have a conversation with us unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as:

- sex

- cars

- or, sport

1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

Thanks for reading this; Yes I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight. But did you know, men really dont mind that. Its like camping.

Pass this on to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.

Pass this on to as many women as you can - to give them an education.