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How much about your past sexual relationships should you share with a new partner?

You know the questions about how many sex partners have you had, who was the best, in what places, etc.

I think that it's best not to disclose that info. People really don't need to know that, do they? All they need to know is if you are clean for diseases, right? Are should they get a complete run down on you? What do you think?

Update:

It should read "or" instead or "are" in the question. Sorry about the incorrect usage.

Update 2:

I'm messing up big time today. It should be "of" instead of "or" in the added details ahead of this one.

27 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I fail to see the point in revealing how many lovers you have had. We are all human, and partners tend to judge, be it themselves or you, when given that information. What is far more relevant is talking about your desires, turns ons, fantasies. Are you dominant? Do you dream of being blind folded or tied up? Always wanted to rent that nun costume for a religous experience all your own? THAT is the sexual history that should be discussed, not how many or how often.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Yeah, i think people try to build up a picture of the risk involved with having a new sexual partner, and so asking how many sexual partners you've had is a fair question.

    We all know that some diseases can be contracted without any ill effects appearing in the person that has contracted the disease for many years. While it is possible for that person's sexual partner to contract the disease, and the symptoms appear in a short time.

    If relationships are your thing, you could both have tests and start with a clean slate and a commitment to each other.

    I personally would prefer a test than knowing your past relationships.

  • 1 decade ago

    I suggest only telling them what they want to hear. I've asked that question in the past and this girl came out with everything.... I didn't feel so special after that and we didn't last much longer. Kind of made me a lil scared to be honest. In my current relationship I know she's been with people and she knows I've been with people but neither one of us asked how many. In general drunken conversations we've talked about places and positions but never, ever talked about how many. I know now that I cant handle knowing. There's just some things that is better left unsaid and that's one of them. Technically, it should matter because you two are together now and not then. There isn't anything you can do to change the past any ways. So why ask?

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Look at it from this perspective:

    Do you want to know about all of his past partners, what info do you want? Cus a guy is not going to really care all that much. Only if you are clean and that your not going to infect him. Us girls are the ones with issues usually. So be honest with you and figure out what you want to know about his past and then be willing to give him the same respect.

    Remember that the past is over and done with. No need to really go there and visit unless you want to.

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  • attila
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    I like to be open, i want to know what they've tried ect.. then i can try something new with them :):) I always ask how many people they've been with because it shows how seriously they take sex.

    Most of the time I think these things come out in natural conversation.. at least they have for me. I don't need details, i dont want to know who was the best - doesnt matter because they're not with them are they?

    I think the what and where can just be a fun conversation sometimes.

  • 1 decade ago

    It's called "history" for a reason. It's in the past, and unless it's germaine to your current relationship, it should remain in the past. Besides... it opens up a can of worms. What if your "number" is too high for your partner (if they're prudish)? What if it's too low (maybe they want someone with more experience)? What if your experiences are too "weird" for them? No, it's best to let that sleeping dog lie.

  • 5 years ago

    i think of its no longer a sturdy thought. a million) it would end-up in an ungainly 2nd. no person likes to get a psychological image of their companion having intercourse with somebody else. 2) whether its sexual or regardless of relationship, we are conversing approximately sexual relationship right here. Its an identical. 3) confident, it would make me insecure because of the fact i'll probable attempt my terrific to do better than what he/she defined

  • 1 decade ago

    2 points

  • 1 decade ago

    I think it's rude to ask. I think it's odd to spit it all out at someone who didn't ask. I think some people are very open in their relationships, and it can be okay for them. I think if you aren't comfortable with it, you definitely should not participate. And yeah, if you have a jealous or sensitive partner, it can create a lot of drama.

  • Robere
    Lv 5
    1 decade ago

    Absolutely none, nada, zip. It is none of his business. I would not trust any character that is asking those kind of questions in a new(even older) relationship. Flat out tell him its none of his business and pay close attention to his reactions. However way he reacts will give you a positive clue to what he is about. Whether he's insecure, immature, freaky in a negative way, or just plain out stupid.

    Watch out for this one. If it smell like crap, believe me it is.

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