gambling!! losing everything?

I was going to make suggestions. Then I realised that I, really, don't know diddly squat.

Gambler's Anonymous do and they are not just their for the gambler but also for those who want to help him.

They've been in the same situation as you and your husband so should have the best idea what to do.

Good luck

Hi - there is a gamblers annomious 800 number, but I do not know it. Maybe try a yahoo search for it. You call it, and they put his name on a list, so he can not get on any river boats, etc...that is about all I know of it.

As far as going bankrupt, here is some information on that - Good luck to you. Also, if you currently are working and can afford the home, why not refinance, put the loan in your name only, that way you are assured of always having your home. Just a thought. Better than going thru a BK.

Claiming Chapter 13 bankruptcy takes longer than a Chapter 7, but your credit will end up in a little better standing. Chapter 13 bankruptcy gives you up to 5 years to pay off your debts. The disadvantage is that you're in bankruptcy for up to 5 years plus your credit report shows your bankruptcy for 7 more years after you have finished paying off your debts.

A Chapter 7 bankruptcy is the least desirable from a credit standpoint, but you are typically out of bankruptcy in 6 months and you don't have to repay any debt. The disadvantage is that this shows on your credit report for 10 years from the date of filing your bankruptcy. Creditors are starting to tighten their credit requirements, and you may have a tough time getting future financing. Laws have changed, and it may be harder to go chapter 7. Check with BK attorney, and do a extensive word search online so you are very informed of that is taken away as secured interest from the BK trustee.

If you do decide to refinance as a rate and term, or as a cash out refinance and pay off your debit only (let hubby pay for is, if you so choose) than use a Broker. A broker underwrites for many company's (I underwrite for 150 companies) so I only have to pull credit 1 time, and they look at my credit. A single lender (not a broker) has programs available, but they may not be able to help you and your situation, so you go elsewhere, and than that person pulls your credit (see what I mean.) If you shop, your credit is pulled and that is considered a soft pull, for a 30 day period. Just like shopping for a auto, it is good for 30 days. If you apply for a credit card, that is considered a "hard" pull and it drags down your credit score. When looking for a home, please do not apply for a credit card, Department Charge Card, Gasoline Card or make any major purchases, like a auto, etc. This will pull your credit down.

Madam, I am a statistician and my job is to compute risks and probabilities. The bookies and casinos have all the odds stacked against us. You must know and understand that, e.g., the odds of winning the Lotto jackpot are 14 million to one against you.

One of the problems with gamblers is the thrill of the risk. I know you are deeply in debt, but if you can divert that thrill-seeking into starting a business, there are plenty of risks involved, plenty of challenges and the potential for high returns on your investment. Meanwhile, take the advice others have given you and get professional counselling.

As for the debt, whatever you do, do not consider suicide as many people do in your circumstances. Life is wonderful despite the problems we face. Sometimes, religion can help people overcome the desire to get rich quick. Have faith and hold onto it.

Good luck and may God bless you.

I am assuming you are in the UK as all your figures were in £s.

i see a lot of answers sympathising with his addiction and your problems but little practical help re your house. so here is a practical answer.

if your husband goes bankrupt his share of the house equity will be used to pay off some (or all of his debts). This means that they will take the current value of the house, less outstanding mortgage, divide it by 2 and thats how much he effectively owns. You will then be given the choice to either -

a - buy out his share. basically you give them his share plus an admin fee of about £250 and then the house gets put into your name.

b - the house will be sold and you will get your share from the proceeds. there is some legislation that says if you have children they have to give you enough time to sort out somewhere else to live first, but there is a time limit after which they can sell it out from under you.

so its ok you saying you can meet the repayments on the house, but you are going to have to re-mortgage it to buy out his share, if you have enough equity on the house to pay off his debts he will be discharged and effectively have this "mark" on his credit record for no other reason than thats the way you did it, in which case you might as well re-mortgage the house, pay off his debts yourselves, seek addiction help and not have the blight of a poor credit history.

Gambling when it is out of control is a self-destructive behaviour - you need to contact GANON (for people who live with gamblers). You cannot help your husband, only he can, but you have a duty to yourself and children to save the roof over your head, get that property solely in your own name before the inevitable happens. Sorry hun. Good Luck

He needs professional help. There are gambling hotlines. There are also psychiatrists that work specifically with addictions such as gambling. Check your local yellow pages, and see about contacting a hotline for other resources you can look into. I'm sorry to hear about your problem. Good luck on finding a solution.

He needs help. Find out if there is a Gamblers Anonymous near you and make him go. Also, get debt couselling. It may work out in your best interests to declare yourselves bankrupt.

P.S. Your husband is a sad git and you are very brave and strong to be standing by him BUT DO NOT GET OR GIVE HIM ANY MORE MONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He needs therapy. If he absolutely wont do anything after you've talked with him and tried your hardest then you have to leave him. If he really cares for you he would be thinking of his family first. If you don't act fast he will take you all the way down with him. You're 10,000 dollars in debt, he's already started taking you down with him. Good luck in talking with him and getting him to a therapist.

WOWW its unfortunate u have that kind of dad but u've got to forgive him cos he is still ur dad, remember if he hadn't gave birth to u, U may not be anybody, so i think u should seat him down and talk to him man to man and u should pray over his gambline llife cos nothing GOD can not do. i think that should not make U stop giving him money cos that will worst every thing, but always talk sense into his mind.

does he know he has a problem? I think he needs therapy. if you left him now his gambeling would get worse and he would probally end up bankrupt and depressed at the best. Try to gat him to seek medical help, and keep your finances seperate as much as possible!