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My girlfriend is pregnant,but we aren't yet ready for this.what should we do?
I am 29 and she is 24 years old,we are together only 3 months,we both dont have stable jobs...but we love each other much.
She want to keep the bebe...im not sure...whats the best thing to do???
26 Answers
- Satin SheetsLv 41 decade agoFavorite Answer
To start with if you weren't ready did you ever hear of birth control?
The choice to keep or not to keep or abortion is both of your choices, but with so many social programs everything an expecting mom needs is available and even after the baby is born there are programs, like here it's called WIC and they furnish all the formula and food for your baby. Your local health department has all that information.
You will manage though and have a beautiful son or daugther. Time to find a steady job though cause children need a lot of things.
Source(s): Personal experience - 1 decade ago
Do not kill your baby by abortion, if you love her, then you love the baby that is part you and part her. Adoption is another way to go, my friend has 7 kids, the last 5 are adopted and they are much better off than the homes that they came from. She shouldn't worry about getting another/different job right now, but you should. Go to an adult school and get some training, many classes aren't very long, (6 weeks to 6 months) you could graduate and have a good job before the baby even comes. There is financial aid available, so don't let that stop you. I have 6 kids, and they are a blessing, each and every one. You'll know what I am talking about when you see your baby for the first time on the ultra sound machine, and when you hold your baby for the first time in your arms.
- 1 decade ago
You're 29 years old and she's 24. If you don't have a stable job that is something you need to work on regardless of if you have a child... more than linkely a child is going to motivate you to do so. When you have a baby you aren't the same person anymore. I have my first child when I was 17 and it gave me just that... motivation to do better for my child.
If she wants to keep the body ultimately you don't have any options, only she does. Forcing her to give up the child when she wants to keep it is going to be very detrimentle to her the rest of her life, where as it's not really going to make a difference for you.
All in all, I think you are both old enough to have and care for a child and it's probably going to be good for you. If I dind't have my daughter when I was 17 I wuoldn't have ever graduated high school or gone to college. She gave me a reason to.
- ?Lv 71 decade ago
Be responsible for the new life that you made. If you're going to play you are going to have to pay. If all of us waited until we had good paying jobs before we had children, the human race as we know it would probably be extinct. If you really don't feel that either of you can take care of the baby properly, there is always adoption. If you choose to keep the child, and you and the girlfriend break up, you still will be responsible for the childs care and well being. Don't have the sex if you don't want the results of it.
- 1 decade ago
Ok first off don't panic.... It will be ok.... I know you feel like you have just been hit by a mac truck but think this through.... She wants to keep it right? Well you have already begun the talking process. Don't jump into the marriage thing just because she is pregnant. Wrong move. You have just known each other 3 mths. And divorce is on the rise so why marry then divorce later, so sad....
Start looking at websites try: http://www.noah-health.org/en/pregnancy/ That will help. Also start looking for couselors around your area that will help you and her communicate and help you through this time.... you are going to be a dad.... be thankful...
- 1 decade ago
I think abortion or giving the baby up is a very personal choice BUT since you are asking the general public i will give my two cents worth.If you aren't ready then why are you pregnant? You are not 15 years old. I feel a baby is a gift from God and i think you should follow your instincts and not what others tell you to do But what you feel is the right adult thing to do,it sounds like the baby was created from love so i think you should follow your hearts
- Anonymous1 decade ago
I know its tough. I think that if you chose abortion it may haunt you forever.
I would suggest that you try real hard to get a stable job with health insurance like the lady suggested.
I hope you have a support system of a good family and friends to help you.
You could consider adoption, but if she wants to keep the baby, and you love one another very much, I think this story is going to have a happy ending ;-)
Good Luck!
- 1 decade ago
DONT GET AN ABORTION WHATEVER YOU DO! you will regret it. you have 9 months to get your lives straightened out. if a 8 months you still dont feel ready, adoption is always an option. Just remember, You have probably like 7-8 months before the child arrives. Thats plenty of time:) C'mon DADDY.
As for medical insurance she can get pregnancy medical through the state. Look into it because your child can stay on it after delivery
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Talk to a counselor. You are both "old" enough to have a child and raise it. I am pro-choice when it comes to abortion, but it's not the choice for me. Abortions are very hard on women, and it could cause a much bigger strain on your relationship than having the baby would. You could also check into adoption. There are several people who long for a child, but can't concieve one on their own. It's a very tough thing, but you and her need to make a decision that you can both live with. I wish you the best of luck.
- designeristaLv 41 decade ago
In the end it is up to you, but try to get a better job in the mean time, one that will give her health insurance at least if she doesnt have it already. Is marriage an option here? If so, I would go see a minister, or whatever is your discretion. They can probably help you. If you love her, you will support her decision to keep the baby.
Where there is a will, there is a way.