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Couples, Help me!! How do you keep attraction alive?

In almost all long term relationships, that "Spark" will waver....how did you or do you keep it burning? I am talking relationships that lasted at least a couple-few years, since for me that qualifies as "long-term".

I really hope some of you will share your ideas and experiences. And when I talk about those "sparks", I mean not just the bedroom kind, but the sentimental and romantic ones as well. And men, I would really love to hear from you, since I don't know if my man realizes this is rather a normal issue for couples... Thanks in advance.

4 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    FOCUS ON YOURSELF! :)

    The most common thing that causes relationships to fail is by submitting yourself almost entirely to routines and common outdated shared interests in the relationship.

    Try something new - something that enhances who you already found yourself to be, and rekindle his interest in your fires.

    Do things on your own and "report back" to the realtionship. This could be anything from getting a new hairstyle to going camping by yourself for a hiatus for several days. You'll bring new energy back with you and your partner will feel the difference, and may even get a bit curious.

    Don't stress if things feel monotonous - relationships all reach that point when the influx of variables becomes predictable.

    Try something exciting, something new you've always wanted to do, and even if the shared interest isn't there - DO IT ANYWAY.

    It's been my experience that men like women of mystery in their lives - and it's natural for most of us to "spill the proverbial beans" in those first passionate years.

    Return to the unknowable enigma you were before he "figured" you out - men love a challenge.

    Source(s): Personal Experience
  • 1 decade ago

    From a man: The short anwer = SEX. Do it often! change it up. be kinky, as far as i know all guys are into some form of kinkyness and if you find what yours is into he will follow you like a dog follows Bacon. And if you want something from him in bed make sure he knows, because knowing is half the battle.

    the long anwer: If you are having to really try that hard maybe there is a reason. Is there a problem with the relationship? or is it just getting old? Are you bored because you are not ready to comit your life with that one person? or are you bored with your life and it has nothing to do with your partner.

    If you really care. you might try asking a professional counselor either couples counseling or personal counseling.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I'm male and it took a long time for me to realize what a special woman I married.

    When she went into clinical depression, I thought that she was just shutting me out, not the whole world, and I lost 30 pounds thinking that I had lost her.

    She is back and wonderful, but it took that much to wake me up to what I had.

    So when dealing with a man: don't hint, don't leave clues, a sledge hammer is what is needed.

  • 1 decade ago

    DO THINGS TOGETHER EXPLORE THINGS AND EACH OTHER TRY NEW THINGS RELEASE ALL OF WHO YOU ARE FIND THINGS THAT YOU CAN ENJOY TOGETHER REMEMBER TO BE A CHILD SOMETIMES LEAN ON EACH OTHER AND NEVER EVER FORGET APPRECIATE EACH OTHER

    THAN PRAY

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