What is the psychology behind fanfic writing?

It sounds to me like a bit of living vicariously. As in, you can't *be* Buffy or Spider-Man, but it would be cool if you were because you really relate to and identifiy with the characters. And writing fan-fiction about them allows you control over them in an intimate way that lets *you* try to be like them, by seeing if you can literally put words in their mouths, thoughts in their heads and deeds on an unofficial track record....and still keep it *them* and not you. ^_^

The idea is that if you can do that, then you've found a way, at least on paper, to be as cool and nifty as you believe the characters are.

I'm not going to argue that this is a bad thing. ^_^ Yeah, I know, other people own the intellectual property rights to the characters so you can't make *money* from this sort of thing, but it isn't about the money. It's about the writing, and finding a way to *be as good* as you think the character is.

And....everyone who has ever read a comic book or a work of fiction and tried to run their own stories--even daydreams in their heads--does this. Everyone. If I knew how to draw worth a hoot, I'd be writing some of *my* fan-fiction comics that I've had going on upstairs, some of them since I was a kid....

But there is a catch. You said it yourself: "This consumes my life. I read the stories obsessively...."

You put a lot of time and work into something that most people only daydream about and/or only tell a few stories about (or run a few roleplaying game characters about...I've done that too). And while I am not going to say fan-fiction isn't a legitimate hobby....the problem is, if you put too much work and effort into things, it does become an obsession, and then when someone else who has done the same thing has a different take....well, it gets ugly as you said.

Just consider for a moment, a bad situation on the *non* fan-fiction side of the fence. I've been a fan, too, of Marvel's X-Men and Spider-Man for ages....but these days, I just *cannot* stand reading Marvel comics. Between Brian Michael Bendis *wiping out most mutants* with his "House of M" event, and Mark Millar doing an out-dated Red State/Blue State thing with "Civil War" (at the egging on of Bendis and Joe Quesada), I just really feel like every character I ever *liked* there is getting crapped on, and *endlessly*.

And yeah, they're superheroes. They're not real. And even so, they are *supposed* to have trials and tribulations and problems. I get this. But for the past year, going on a year and a half, *every last* character *I* like has been put through a nonstop meat-grinder. All of them, and it's been bad.

And it hurts. And the only way I can keep from being obsessive about it is to just say "Screw you guys, I'm not even looking at your comics....never mind buying them. I will wait until you (Bendis, Millar) guys leave Marvel."

And yeah, it sucks that I have to be like that. But you know what? At some point I have to put my own real life before their fiction.

And that sounds like where you're at right now...that it might do you some good to take a break....go back to just reading again, or back off entirely and find something else to do. Just leave it for a bit and put your own real life first.

After all, if you're good enough to *write* about your heroes, doesn't that mean that you already *have* everything that you love about them so much....somewhere inside of you? ^_^

Just saying....I hope this helps. ^_^ Thanks for your time!

Im worried about you because it sounds as if these stories are controlling you. You are giving up your life for these fictitious stories. You know you are addicted if you get irritable when you cant watch them, or write about them, and then you feel better when you get a chance to watch or write.

If you are an addict, this is very serious. Take it just as one would take a drug or alcohal addiction. Get some help.

Try this. Try not to watch or write about it for one whole day. (Thinking about it for now is fine) Write down all the withdrawal symptoms you go through while not being able to watch or write. Try to do this at least once a week, and then make it more as time goes by.

Once you free yourself from the hold this has on you, you will experience true living, true goal setting and have your own life. Remember, there are people out there that care about you, and you are not alone in this.

I know what you mean you fall in love with the characters and you don't want their story to end, so instead of making up sequels for characters, write you own stories about your own characters that you create yourself. Who knows you might become the next move writer!