Problems with the father of my son?

If talking with the boy's dad doesn't get you anywhere, try this:

First, send him a letter (no, I'm not kidding) addressing the issues you have while your son is at his dad's. Send the letter with a return receipt so you have proof you sent it. It doesn't matter if he refuses it, just that you sent it; you need some kind of proof that you tried to make him aware of these problems.

If after you send the letter the behavior continues, let him know that this is unacceptable, and refuse to let your child go over there on weekends. I know this is likely to disrupt your life, but it's necessary. Also, in almost all states, CHILD SUPPORT IS NOT DEPENDENT UPON VISITATION!!! This means that, even if the non-custodial parent can't/won't/doesn't see the child, he/she is still responsible for paying child support. Once he's made aware of this, he'll blow a gasket and take you to court over it. Good.

When in court, show the judge your letter and explain that you've tried to talk to the dad about these issues. Also, if you can get support (in writing) from your child's teachers, clergy, babysitters, etc. as to changes in behavior after the "dad" weekends, this will help a great deal in making your case (that your ex's attitude is hurting your son). Also keep in mind that your ex is going to be a di@k and bring up all sorts of stuff about you. Don't let him distract you. The main point is how he allows his son to do things you feel are inappropriate. If he wants to bring up your parenting skills, he can do that next time.

The bottom line is, your son is the one suffering. That should be your primary focus. These are harsh steps to take, but I don't think anything is too harsh to ensure my child's safety and well being.

Good luck!

I'm going through the same thing but had one advantage. My son's dad ditched out from 1-7 so I was able to raise him for the most part by myself. Everything I say is wrong (my son is lactose intolerant and shouldn't have too much milk products because it causes severe constipation for him so he piles it on, my son has add and is on meds to help him focus and he claims he doesn't need it, my son has a small bladder and takes a pill for it so he doesn't wet the bed he refuses-funny thing just happened, he peed my ex's couch because he was off it for two days and ex piled on the drinks....lollollolloll on my ex not son., and the list goes on and on). The best you can do is take this back to court and have the judge smack your ex's behind, tell him he is behaving poorly, and hope your ex abides by the judges orders. I hate to say it but right now it's mostly on you. It's going to be tough but if you keep at him to behave properly and remind him just because he behaves that way at daddy's house doesn't mean he can behave that way at home hopefully things will get easier. Make him aware there are consequences to behaving like that at home and stick to the punishments. Also, since he is 6 I am guessing he is in school I would suggest contacting the school and letting them know the situation and maybe sit down with your son to let him know that if he behaves or says anything inappropriate that it will not be tolerated at school.

Good luck to you.

I might be totally wrong for this answer, but I think you should come up with a public place for your son to see his father. I agree with you about the things he's watching. They are not appropriate for a boy his age. I'm 21, and I don't watch that mess. I feel that the only reason why your ex-husband lets your son watch that stuff is to come off as the "cool parent". he obviously sucks and knows it, so to make himself seem like less of a failure, he wants to win the child over. I'm sure he'll give you a hard time about visitation, but if you bring up in court about the crap he lets the child watch, he'll be off your back in no time, because if I'm not mistaking, that can be claimed as neglect. Good luck!

Keep on teaching your son how to behave properly and how to make good decisions for himself. If your lessons to your son make sense to him, if he can own them & understand them, then Dad (and society & movies & dad's girlfriend & his school friends) won't be able to undermine them.

So, he comes home & tells you that he saw some scary movie or a movie where people/cartoon characters act inappropriately. You say to him, "What did you think about it? Did you think that the people acted properly towards each other in that movie? How would you feel if people treated you like that?, etc"

If you can't stop them, use them as learning and growing experiences for him.

i do no longer understand what the guidelines are interior the u . s . a . with regards to those sort of subjects, yet i think of which you will desire to formalise the region. One wonders if Bob is financing his son. If no longer, then it may look that he lends truthfully no longer something of earnings to Drew's wellbeing. Why no longer communicate on your loved ones courtroom - or whoever made the visitation order interior the 1st place - and get some recommended suggestion. i do no longer think of that 'doing no longer something' and enjoying ostrich is a sturdy theory.

Dosent sound like he will change for his son, which is sad.... The best you can do is raise him up the best you can and if it gets worse, dont let him go to his dads that much, and I know thats easyer said than done, but the right things to do are always the hardest...

talk to your child about each one of the shows and tell him the cartoons are not real and he will keep getting into trouble.

I would go to court and tell the judge what you told us because that is absolutely NOT acceptable.

Cancel visitation duh. Sorry for it to sound so simple and demeaning, but simply cancel visitation and garnish is paycheck. (there will be NO withholding of support) Take him to court and request supervised visitation as your son is BEING ABUSED (add to that, you are being a bad mother by allowing your son to be abused by his father.) Sorry again for sounding harsh, but I'm giving you the BLT (bottom line truth)