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Are we okay?

My husband I and got married in our early twenties, now six years later something feels funny. I believe that he still loves me and I still love him. But I know he feels like he didn't get a chance to be young, you know partying, dating other women etc. Will this take a toll on us at some point. During the past six years we have had ups and downs. I am a good wife to him and he is a good father. I just don't want him to one day try to take part on what he think he has missed out on. I think that some part of him regrets this and I'm scared that he is staying out of convience. No I didn't trap him into marrying me either. At the time we were excited about it. A friend told me since he is 30 now maybe it just a phase.

7 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    see...i got married(love marriage) at the age of 16....during my first night with my husband(after marriage)....when he was kissing me, i became frustreated.....i was thinking, "i lost my life at the age of 16......i dint get option to judge a lots of men...my life is stuck with this men!.......but, right after the day, my frustration has gone...i feel myself sooo lucky that i could marry him at that little age.

    look at urself....

    do u think, doing party and clubbing is life? is that enjoyment? they all r nothing but dirtyness........doing these all, at the end of the day when u would come at ur home, u wouldnt find anyone to listen u...anyone in ur bed who will hug u...all the males around u would ready to sleep with u-but, not ready to take ur responsibility. no one would be there to give ur security......

    how nice life u have got......with the mercy of Allah........if u wouldnt marry at that age, could loose ur virginity with lots of stupids-who had no intension to live with u for life time, faced so many difficultires----clashes with parents, for meeting up with sexual needs did wrong things, may be could get pregnant and had to go for abortion...and so many things. i dont find these all as life-feel like animalistic liofe.

    all day after working when i find my husbands arms on my bed to sleep there...i give thnx to Allah......that, he put me in such safer place.....i m so happy.....with the grace of Allah.....u too r so happy.......dont be confused with that animalistic lifestyle.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    I was 22 and she was 18. That was near 12 years ago. Yes, I felt I missed out on partying. These feelings were phases, and did pass - but not always completely.

    You two need to focus on what you did not miss out on. That is each other. If you are honest about it you will prob see that if was a good trade.

    Anyway you are both still young and there is no reason you cannot still go out and party.

    Hell, if you were 60 year old, you could still go out and party. Get a sitter, and goto a party. Enjoy each other like you used to.

  • 1 decade ago

    'Something feels funny ' This is something i have felt before except my phrase was 'somthings not right'. I have been married for 14 years and 7 years ago my fairy tale life came crashing down, we were also married young and neither of us had a 'normal ' young life,so when he had an affair this is somthing I blamed ,beleiving curiosity killed the cat.. I could go on and on about my life but I wont I will however say that we stayed together and are going great. My advice is this ALWAYS TRUST YOUR GUT FEELINGS and THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS BLACK AND WHITE ONLY LOTS OF GREY.Be strong and love yourself. Good luck.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    this is a situation many people have dealt with. first i would maybe suggest a vacation together. just the two of u alone. while on vacation be wild and reclusive and act like u would have before u were married. this will let him know that u can let ur wild side come out and that he is married to a great woman. if this attempt fails ask him very nochaluantly about how he feels and say that u will do whatever u can to satisfy his feelings. Good luck!

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  • Renee
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    If he has made no attempt to seek that life that you think he missed, then why worry about something that is not there, and people do grow out of that, I would say just enjoy what you have, and make a special effort for you two do something special on the weekends if possible....

  • 1 decade ago

    i have a husband, we re partying every saturday - go to restaurant and after to night club. also we go to spas very often and on short trips. when we go somewhere with kids (my kids) after they go to beds we sit, drink wine and talk. so what is not letting u 2 do the same and enjoy each other's company? i would never ever change him for anybody, even when i was single after divorsing i had the partiest life ever - dating, travelling, going out, falling in love etc. so make your husband value u. it is very very hard to find a soul mate partner. it is one in a millon. u have to make your hubby to understand it

  • 1 decade ago

    It sounds like a midlife crisis,he'll get over it but I warn you,there'll be others at certain times in both of your lives.

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