my BF and are having huge problems. Help!!! I don't know how we got this far?

If he truely loved you, he wouldnt hurt you. Have a talk with him about his physical abuse. If he tries to shrug you off about the subjet, or gets physical about it, then its time for you to leave. You've seen your mom go through it, why do it yourself. People can be together for 20 years with physical/mental abuse and it take them that long to realize they can do better. Dont think of what if he leaves, where will you be without him. It can get worse over the years. You dont want the worst of him to come out later. You wont see the end results. I wish you the best in your decision.

It's already gone too far. When it gets physical it's way too far. It seems that he is unhappy. Is he cheating on you? Seems his feelings have changed for some reason. You two have been together for a long time & he may just want some space but feels that he can't get it or he may be cheating on the side b/c his attitude towards you when you came on to him was uncalled for. I know you two are on a lease. I don't even know if you two can sit down and have a convo & it not be nonconfrontational. You may need to consider breaking your lease b/c this isn't healthy for either one of you. I know you love and want your man but when it starts to get physical, you need to step back.

i'd suggest that you first talk to him. especially if you really love him. make him realize what he's doing and tell him that you don't want to be abused. that it's not suppose to be that way. tell him that you really love him and you don't want to be forced to leave him because of the way he has been acting recently.

let it be known to him the whole time that you love him and that you're just upset about what is going on and confused about what is making him be like this. just make him realize what he is doing.

worse comes to worse if he is being very abusive with you and he is not listening to you or anything, i know even if you love him you may have to break up with him. because you don't want to be in a relationship where you can be getting physically hurt and you don't want to be with someone who has anger issues.

wow this is tough cuz u grew up seeing this

but u shouldnt tolerate it

any type of abuse is not good

well if u was too bring this to his attention he wouldnt listen

so what u need to do is find out whats really bothering him

what i have learn about this situation is that whenever a couple fights over petty stuff is because theres something big behind it and all these petty fight are a reflection of the big deal

so try to find out whats really botherin her

it could be life itself that is botherin or his career , or family

find out

but dont allow ur self to be treated like this

Don't take abuse! lease or no lease tell him to get help with his anger issues(quitely around other people) and if he don't TIME TO LEAVE. I really wouldn't give him a second chance at all and just leave. but you can try the first part if you really love him.

you can't be with a guy who gets physical with you in an argument. you just can't. this whole situation is just wrong.

i remember a friend of mine got into an argument with her boyfriend, and he shoved her onto the ground. we told a few of our guy friends about this and they got really serious. they said "that's either in your head or it isn't. you don't touch a girl like that. there's something really wrong if you let yourself do that."

a problem is that boys who grew up in households with domestic abuse often take that into their relationships when they grow up. they grow up, deep down, thinking that's ok. girls who grow up in that environment often find themselves with a man like their father.

but you can rid yourself of this, and learn from it, and learn how to watch out for this behaviour and avoid it in the future.

seriously, just get out. i know you love him no matter what and you don't want to leave him, but you have to.

well i would talk to him openly about evrything and if all else fails leave himand go back to your parents..