Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.
Trending News
A funny joke my teacher taught me =)?
A duck walks into a bar and ask the Bar Tender "got any grapes" the Bar Tender says "no" so the duck leaves. The next day the duck comes back and says again " got any grapes " and the Bar Tender very confused says "no"the duck leaves again. The next day the same thing happens and the Bar Tender finally say " no and if you come back and ask tha again I'm going to nail your bill to this bar" so the duck leaves. The next day the duck comes back and says "got any nails" the Bar Tender says "no" "got any grapes"
It's not that funny though I don't laugh at it but you might like it lol
11 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
hehe... sorry i can't think of any jokes... but i'll give you this
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"
Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?"
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".
The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"
The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.
After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."
"Yes," the class said.
"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"
A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
"Take only ONE. God is watching."
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."
- twinkLeLv 61 decade ago
It made me laugh....:P
Here's one for you
Mr. Johnson walked anxiously to the house and knocked. When a nice old lady answered, he said very sad, “I’m sorry, madam, but I have some bad news. “I’m afraid I have run over your cat. I… I would like to replace it.”
The little lady looked him up and down and said, “I’m game, but how are you at catching mice?”
CHeeRioS
- 1 decade ago
I've heard of it before, it was about a parrot and crackers. Not much on the funny scale...
Source(s): The Shadow Files! - Anonymous1 decade ago
LOL !!! I think that its so funny !!! HAHA... Well thats just me. I laugh at almost every joke so yeah (even if I dont get it sometimes... LMAO) ! Good joke though ^_^ I'll tell my friends ...lol
- How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Ha that is funny.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
i dont get it , it not that funny at all but its not your fault its your teachers