Stranger asked to hold my baby?

Aww, most people don't mean to do any harm and don't see anything wrong with it, which is why they ask to hold the baby in the first place. Babies are so cute so sometimes they can't help but ask. I know what you mean though. There are a lot of concerns, like will she drop my baby, does she know how to hold her, will she make my baby sick? Even extreme things would run through my mind like "is she trying to steal her?" but it's all part of being a mom. In mexican cultures, it's even bad luck NOT to have a stranger hold a baby for fear of giving it "ojo" which is just some superstition. It really just depends on you. Just because your mother let a stranger hold the baby doesn't mean that she shouldn't care for her anymore. There's nothing wrong with her. Maybe next time let her know that it really bothers you and to make sure no one holds her even if it seems kind of rude. She's your baby afterall.

I am a newly wed and i just gave birth to my lovely baby daughter 3 months ago. I could totally relate to what you're feeling regarding strangers holding your baby. It's natural for us to be over protective of our little one especially if you're a first time mom.

But having the feeling of wanting to take away your baby from a person who is not exactly a total stranger to you and your family, maybe a bit over reactive.

Now if the case is, you or your mom were walking along the side of the road and a total stranger (someone you have never seen before ever in your life), has asked to hold your baby, of course you would run the other way to protect your baby.

Ok, I know where you're coming from. Maybe you really just don't like your mom's friend for some reason that's why you didn't want her to hold your baby.

Maybe it would have been best if, when you saw her already holding your baby, you act as if you've never seen your baby for a whole day and just briefly acknowledge the presence of that person and GENTLY take your baby from her then promptly excuse yourself and just say something like, "I'm sorry I had to take her, it's just time for her nap.." or something to that effect. That way, no one will be offended and that person would just think it's "mother-and-baby time."

hope this helps.

I would be the same exact way. You can't trust people and it's not worth taking the risk just because you felt bad for saying "no". I'm almost 38 weeks pregnant with our first child, a baby boy, and I'm telling you I don't care if I offend people.... strangers are NOT holding my child. They can admire him, touch his little hands/toes (I know older people love touching the little ones and I don't see anything wrong with it), but as for taking him out of my arms.... NO WAY.

I'm not the "overprotective" type either, but when it comes to complete strangers and, for instance, in your case: 2 month old twins who aren't even capable of making decisions or even fending for themselves, I'd rather be a little on the "overprotective" side and not take the chance... and some people may get offended, and others can totally relate. It doesn't matter what other people think, they are your children! Whatever you say, goes.

I'd tell your mom not to allow that to happen anymore. There are ways to tell people "no" without offending them, and if they don't like it, that's their problem.

I don't blame you at all!! I would have taken the baby. You have know idea when the last time she washed her hands was or anything. I think it is inappropriate for people who do not know you well to ask to hold or touch your baby. I have a preemie who is now 11 months old and has never been really sick. She was born during RSV season last year and made it through just fine, but I was very protective. People should understand you are doing what you feel is right for your baby!

You need to explain to your mom that you babies are only 2 months old and infections are real easy to pass and receive and you know money is one of the dirtiest things we use everyday and that you don't want to put you baby at risk to get sick cause she cant say no. If your mom still does not care to hear what you have to say I hate to say it but maybe you should look at other sitting options. Just think if she cant say no to something so simple as don't let strangers hold my baby what else later will she not care for you option about when it comes to YOUR BABIES. Good luck.

I understand your fears! And a lot of other moms do too. There is even an on-line store that hits home neuroticmoms.com.

First they want to touch your belly... then the babies :) but did they wash their hands?

I think I would first try to reason with Mom, and if you feel that she isn't saying no or at least getting them to go wash seek other care for your baby.

i totally agree with you that not only is it inappropriate for strangers to hold a baby it is also a bit out of line for your mom to let them.

May I ask why only one baby is with your mom?

I think if it is possible decree your mom watching your baby.

As for something for you or her to say, simple redirect the conversation unless the person gets pushy and then just say, "I know in my mind I am being silly, but in my heart I just really feel uncomfortable when I let someone else hold my baby. Sorry! Please forgive me for being an overprotective mother... or sorry, it must be a first time mom thing or something..." Because really that is the truth of it and you are telling them where you are coming from.

If they continue to push they you can just be rude since then they aren't respecting you!

Best of luck and always follow your instincts!

if your mother doesnt respect your wishes then i advice to leave the baby with someone else, or simply take care of her yourself.

I know what you mean and how you feel, and although strangers some of them dont mean any harm, you have to take care of your baby and you dont know where there hands have been last, if they are dirty or not.

She is your baby, so your mum should listen to you.

tell her to tell them that she doesnt like when strangers pick her up, or that when strangers pick her up and then give her back or put her down in the pram or whatever she gets really unsettled ..

i do recommend though that you no longer leave her with your mum, as it does not sound like she will do what you want.

i suppose saying something like that could be interpreted as an insult - but i find that completely ridiculous.

it is your child and you have the right to decide who does and does not hold it!! reading that back it seems to have come across as childish and bossy but it really is your right to decide how your baby is treated.

express your concerns about the baby's HEALTH safety and maybe your mum will see it your way

dont let your family change you mind; i really think you are right in not wanting strangers holding your child!! you reserve the right to be angry (i mean, you carried bloody TWINS around for 9 months!! :))

I understand completely. I wouldnt want a starnger holding my child either!! It's absurd! God knows what germs they have on there hands, and if she will let one person hold your daughter cause she feels rude saying no then how many other people will she let hold your daughter. I would be so paranoid about her getting ill!! Im sorry i dont mean to sound mean but i proberly wouldnt leave her with your mum!!