Joke--English to Chinese translation?

English to Chinese fake translation of some common expressions. They are very funny, especially when they capture the Chinese accent! You need to read them carefully for the right effect:

1) That's not right........... Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive?. Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP..................... Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid Man.............................. Dum ***

5) Small Horse.............................. Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach? ... Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped into a coffee table. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8) I think you need a face lift....Chin Tu Fat

9) Its very dark in here.............. Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone..... No Pah King

12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week ... Wai Yu Kum Nao

13) Staying out of.................... Lei Ying Lo

14) He's cleaning his automobile.. Wa Shing Ka

15) Your body odor is offensive....Yu Stin Ki Pu