Closure for Miscarriages?

Changing the World,

I am so sorry for your loss. No matter what anyone might say, you have been a mother. Those children may not have lived long enough to be born, but they did exist and their lives and deaths were real. Have you taken time to morn them and to have some sort of private memorial service for them to say goodbye? If you have not done that, then it makes sense that you have not been able to find closure. Here is a beautiful site where parents who have lost babies through miscarriage or shortly after birth can create a memorial for them to express their love and grief. http://www.honoredbabies.org/memorial/memorial1.ht...

You may want to consider creating a memorial for your lost little ones. They were alive just like you and me, the only difference is that they weren't given as much time here as we were. They have as much right to be remembered and loved as any other human being. No matter what you decide to do, I hope you are able to find some way to heal the pain that comes with miscarriage.

Blessings,

Vitamin

I am sorry to read of your loss, i do not believe I have had anything along those lines happen to me, (some miscarriages happen and it is just like a normal period) for which I am grateful. I really do not know how I would handle it and know I would always blame myself :(. A lot of respondants have indicated that it is common and not necessarily a fault thing. There is a saying "things happen for a reason" for which I believe but not always understand why some things happen.... I loved and enjoyed every moment of my babies growing inside of me and was very fortunate for them to be born healthy, even if either of them was born with a disability I would have loved them and never not wanted them... I do see families around with child/ren with disabilities and think that would be soooo hard. So maybe as horrible as it may seem it maybe a hidden blessing. I am still of child bearing age and am not quite sure I am done with pregnancy and babies and maybe I will try again???? If the unfortunate did ever happen I really hope I would turn the negative into a positive and still celebrate the child, i would start by planting a tree/plant something and nuture it and watch it grow as my child would have, on the due date (birthday) each year I would light a candle and remember my angel child... oh this is so sad I do hope you can find a way to help yourself heal and quickly. Sending hugs n smiles your way...

Humans are like mass produced machines such as automobiles are on an assembly line. 99% of them created start and run just fine but that 1% for some reason don't. There might be a physical defect that is causing your miscarriages that is not your fault. It maybe something that can be corrected and maybe it can't. You will have to see a specialist who can try and find out the cause and then deside how to treat it. It is easy for me to say this but don't blame yourself or the babys. It's neither one of yours fault. Good luck to you in the future. You sound like you would make a wonderfull mother for a lucky child no matter how they come into your life.

OMG. That makes me so sad.... What jerks that would tell you some of the things you have been told. Shame on them.

I'm 19, and I've had one. And I was alone when it happened, and very frightened, mostly cause I didn't even know I was pregnant. I don't like to talk about it...

But I am a member of the LDS faith, and I know for certain that things happen for a reason, and I MUST trust in heavenly father for all my strength and perhaps you can too, I just don't know your faith and didn't want to assume you were a Christian. I would go into greater detail on the matter, but I don't want to confuse or hurt you, but if you are interested in hearing more about what I believe, e-mail me. I'll talk to you, and maybe share a little more....

And if you are wondering about whether God has forgotten your babies....

Jeremiah 1:5

Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you......

Loss such as this is never easy......

and I know I think of that child that could have been with great longing.....I was young like you also when I lost mine..........Finally at 29 I was able to carry a child to term.....Now I have 2 beautiful sons....there is always hope where there is faith.......I wish I could give you a magic word or phrase to erase the pain and emptiness I know that I felt.......There isn't so you take those feelings and turn it into compassion so it does not turn you bitter......Prayer worked for me......Supportive family and friends held me up when I could not do so for myself.....I was fortunate.

Peace be with you.

((((HUGS)))) so very sorry to hear this

darling you have had a check I hope , to see why you aren't able to carry ?

there may be something very easily fixed

and you may need some grief counselling

this is a lot for anyone to go through , let alone someone so young

please concentrate a little on yourself and on your health before trying again darling

I honestly dont know what to say that can help ....

except one day , when you are able to have that baby

it is more than likely going to be the most loved baby in the world

p.s please also remember that your fiance may be grieving also

but they try to pretend to be strong for us at times and hide their emotions

much love to you both xx

edit

you guys above ... where the hell is your compassion ?

i would consider getting on some kind of birth control...

miscarriages are very hard on your body, and your emotions as well. to have had five in so short a time cannot be good for you.

i've had one...when i was quite a bit younger, and honestly it still bothers me sometimes.

it might be a good idea to get some counseling to help you sort this out.

good luck. bright blessings and comfort to you.

I'm so sorry you're suffering ~hugs tightly~

I suggest that you surround yourself with people who love you and who care about you, be they the members of your religion (if you have one) or be they simply your friends and family.

Do talk it out with your boyfriend. Be there for each other. And yes, do go see a doctor in case you haven't, have some tests made, so maybe they can find out what's causing miscarriages.

Wish you all the best in your life. If you want to talk to someone, feel free to click that *send e-mail* button on my profile page.

((((HUGS))))

ask jws at watchtower.org,they'll be happy to provide information on this.

Stay the hell away from god! Those scum bags will target you if you are in a vulnerable situation. They'll fill your head with lies and turn you into one of their many mindless pawns to ruthlessly use as they desire.