Something to think about?

Question

Doors are on a house so you don't have to go through the windows.

If you can't get the skeletons out of your closet, you'd better teach them to dance.

Stupid is just a 5 letter word.

Don't ask me to think inside my head, because I lost my inside voice.

Why did the kamikazes wear helmets?

Friends are like condoms, they protect each other when things get hard.

No one ever says "it's only a game" if their team is winning.

Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.

If UFO's are supposed to be so intelligent, then why have they abducted humans?

Anyone who says "As easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried it.

If voting could change anything, it would be illegal.

I try to take life one day at a time, BUT lately several days have attacked me at once!

That that is, is. That that is not, is not. That that is is not that that is not, and that that is not is not that that is.

If you got a problem, cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it.

I never repeat myself, so pay close attention to me the first time, cause I never repeat myself.

Work is blackmail for survival.

Don't look a gift horse in the mouth without first giving him a Certs.

Canaries are the best, especially with ketchup on them.

Slow and steady gets you trampled by the other guys.

When opportunity knocks, shoot first and ask questions later.

Fun flies when you're doing time.

When all else fails, use duct tape.

Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool?

If the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the "Jags" and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the "Bucs", what does that make the Tennessee Titans?

Why do they sterilize the needle for leathal injection?

You are now entering a school free drug zone. Thank you for pot smoking.

♥Panda♥ · Accepted Answer

ha ha ha! here's a few more! (and some off-topic ones!)

Why aren't guys like lattes-rich,strong,and hot

It's a matter of life after -now that he's , I have a life

Friends will always be like "well you deserve better" but best friends will be prank calling him saying "you will die in seven days"

Boys are like trees-they take 50 years to grow up. (and that's being generous)

Life isn't passing me by, it's trying to run me over.

You laugh now because you're older than me by mere months, but when you're 30 and I'm still 29, who will be laughing then?

 agree with the dictionary. grls before guys, partying before studying, and friends before love.

I don't obsess! I think intensely.

I understand that Scissors can beat Paper, and I get how Rock can beat Scissors, but there's no way Paper can beat Rock. Is Paper supposed to magically wrap around Rock leaving it immobile? If so, why can't paper do this to scissors? Screw scissors, why can't paper do this to people? Why aren't sheets of college ruled notebook paper constantly suffocating students as they attempt to take notes in class? I'll tell you why, because paper can't beat anybody, a rock would tear that crap up in two seconds. When I play rock/ paper/ scissors, I always choose rock. Then when somebody claims to have beaten me with their paper I can punch them in the face with my ready made fist and say, oh, I'm sorry, I thought paper would protect you, you asshole!

A friend will help you move a body, a BEST friend will help you move the body of your ex boyfriend to a ditch on the side of the freeway

Having the love of your life say "we can still be friends", is like having your dog die and your mom saying you can still keep it.

Anonymous · Answer

Here's some stuff that amazes me:

Only in America...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and leave useless things and junk in boxes in the garage... 

Only in America...do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place... 

Only in America...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight... 

Only in America...do we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "Poli" in latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures"...

ThePoloHole · Answer

LOL 

i like these a lot!

i put "Stupid is just a 5 letter word." in my screen name on Messenger!

thanks! 

starred

j_emmans · Answer

wo thats a lot of stuff you got there, I would have done 26 questions with that!

Anonymous · Answer

LOL
very funny rose :)

larry m♥ · Answer

There's a whole lotta truth, there. lol.

nonoodles74 · Answer

lol i like the friends-condom one :) x

Anonymous · Answer

brilliant star4u

Anonymous · Answer

haha funny

tastybits · Answer

hehehe, like it hun, pmsl

star time

xxxxxxxx

Trending News

Something to think about?

14 Answers