Why do I even keep going?

Is there anything at all that gives you joy or pleasure in life??

This is easier said than done - obviously - but try to participate in things you really enjoy. Do it for YOU. Life is about YOU - so live it in a way to make yourself happy.

Animals may be a good place to start - because they will love you unconditionally & appreciate all you do for them. Do some volunteer work at an animal shelter and help some of these poor unwanted animals feel a little happier. Sometimes it's easier to start small and work your way up. Spend time with one animal - like a dog. Go for walks, enjoy nature, and enjoy the affection the dog will show you. Maybe it sounds silly - but animals are great for relieving stress & sadness - that's why they have those organizations that bring animals to hospitals & such to cheer up the patients.

Do you enjoy cooking or painting or writing, etc? I know things like this can seem so unattractive when you are depressed - but maybe you can focus your pain on new activities. You can express this hurt through your creations.

Don't forget - no matter how alone you feel, there are millions of people feeling the same way you do. I bet several of your coworkers who greet you with that same fake smile are hurting just as deeply as you are. I,too, am one of those people who ached inside with indescribable pain & misery. But to the outside world, I was the happiest most joyful person they knew. It's easier to smile & say everything is fabulous, than to admit you suffer.

If you need to talk about this, find an online group who all share similar feelings. Like a depression support group, or abuse support group. That way you can talk for free with people online. They don't ever have to know who you are, and you can get all this pain out into the open. Talking about it will help you feel better - it will release it from being trapped inside. And then maybe you will find that, slowly, you CAN get over it. It will take a lot of hard work & determination, but you can make steps to improve how you feel about life & yourself.

-N

Why is it so hard for you to get over? That happened in the past, and you shouldn't continue to dwell on it now thats why its called the past and today is the present, and there is no telling what today will bring, but you have to just suck it up and get over it. Its about to be a brand new year, you've been sitting up at work faking it this long, why not just be okay with it and allow yourself to be happy. Tomorrow is not promised, so there fore you should try and live every single day of your life like its your last, try going out and doing something today, even if its just going to the grocery store and reading a book in the book section, be friendly and speak, and ask someone how is there day, just to make small talk w/ someone. This year has been a very rough year for me, and so has my life, but i just look at each situation like a chapter in a book, once I overcome it what ever obstacle come my way, I just start a new chapter and pray that its better than the last. Seeing a psychologist is not necessary, you just gotta start loving yourself, if you need someone to talk to, feel free to email me. Hope your having a great day, and try and smile, just for the hell of it, it'll make u feel better!

your problem is really complicated that I don't even know where to start.

darkridr, you know what I've learned from my own experience in life, that being alone is not a bad thing!you see I'm an ugly 19 years old who's studying dentistry,I have only 2 friends,no girlfriend,I don't go out that much...... and why is that good??because it gives me time to study harder,to work on myself and use my time in something useful or something that I like for ex.study investing,drawing,reading,learning a new hobby.....etc

it gives you time to really become the best and the most successful person you can ever be, then you won't feel lonely anymore.and I also learned that little things such as running for 30min/day,listening to music,watching a comedy show,taking a bath will help greatly.

you just have to relax and work on yourself(mind,soul and body) then you would feel great.

I truly wish you the best of good luck.

take care ^____^

Chad

You keep going because you are obviously a strong person who refuses to give up! Drink lotts of fresh squeezed juices for a week and then see how you feel. I did this and my depression was gone.

I think youre doing the right thing....keep venting...even if its in this forum....we're real people out here and we dont have all the answers even if we think we do. In a sense, know that we are all "listening" and many of us HAVE walked in your shoes before too. God Bless.