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no religion know peace
Lv 5
no religion know peace asked in Pregnancy & ParentingAdolescent · 1 decade ago

I am having a hard time adjusting to my child's decision......?

I realize that I cant force her to do something she does not want to do. and I do not want her to continue because she feels like she has to in order to make me happy. that said I feel like I have lost the closest connection I had with her. to see her with as much promise and support as she has just quit ...breaks my heart. I know that i have to be supportive of her decision whether i agree with it or not. anything less would put her at risk for an injury that I be responsible for. I have never tried to live my life through her and I would feel the same way if she had given up the math club. I will miss watching her grow in confidence and ability. I will always have the memories that th share for those I will be eternally grateful to her.

Update:

i guess I am looking for ways other parents have adjusted

Update 2:

she raced motocross. and still is a very talented and skilled rider. few girls at 12 can do the things on a motorcycle that she can do. I left out her sport at first because I did not think that the sport is as important as the decision that she gave it up.

Update 3:

last year she was a fully sponsored racer the gear the bikes coaching lessons, practice ...everything covered. some thought a career as a professional was likely. she raced in a national event the week she turned 12 and did quite well.and was a top offroad rider by the age of 10 in a class where she was the only girl. hopefully you can see that I am not some dad who wants thinks his little leaguer is going to be a pro in 10-15 years. she was on the cusp of realizing a dream and then one day she puts it down. I have always been careful to not let this become my dream perhaps I missed the mark

5 Answers

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  • fighterfish
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    wow,all the same interests as my son.A little trouble with the question...is she gone with mum?&you having trouble adjusting without her?Or is it that she no longer wishes to pursue these things we see as a definate building block to the future???If that's it,i'm sorry but you have to let her do the stuff she now wishes to..(is this how you were vicariously living through her?did she get where you couldn't?)cos i think you know what i&most people would say about that!!!This is what kids do(my son did martial arts since he was 5,just about to start the black belt stuff&hey mum,i'm quitting)now he says he's stopping the guitar too(good at both,but what can i do)can't force him to finish it.He is 12so bikes,cars ect art the BOMB....

    On the seperation side,i know it hurts but the choice has been made.You will have to be strong&live with it,you need to accept,grin&bear it so as not to close the only line of open comminication you have.This is how my sons dad did it&it is only his fault that he had no time/interest, that his son lost need&interst in him.

    You can only treasure the memories&make new ones,mainly all based around her&her things,but she will change through the phases&come back round to being dady's little girl,promise just wait....

    SO,BE SUPPORTIVE,UNDERSTANDING(even if you dont agree)LOVING&most of all let her make a couple of mistakes(she'll learn)KEEP you'r arms always open&she/you will be fine(foe a long long time)

    (sorry if i miss-interperated question)GOOD LUCK

    Source(s): single mum of 12yr boy&my friends teenage daughters causing their parent hell.
  • bw
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    whats the question and what was her decision???????????

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    .......youre being very dramatic...its just a sport. she's doing something she loves. It would be selfish of you to not let her ride motorcross because it'd make her miserable.

  • chaoswantsangel
    1 decade ago

    what was her decision.tell the whole story..you sound very dramatic with no substance

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  • Nat
    1 decade ago

    uhh... dont exactly get what your saying but i kinda got the jist of it. Maybe you need to let go a little and let her make her own mistakes and learn from them.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    so what is the question? be more specific on what decision your child made. then you will get better answers.

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