if you can't ever work it out..?

It is never healthy to say never, so say for now.

Not a lot of information in the questions so it is hard to say what is going on, but it is not unusual for some conflict between a MIL and a spouse, as a matter of fact you can find a million jokes about just this thing. So you are not alone.

It will affect your So only if you let it. You must not complain about her to him and you must avoid getting mad at her around him. Never bad talk her to him.

I hate to tell you this but you will find out sooner or later...for most people blood is thicker than water, so he will want to defend her before you. Don't put him in that situation.

You need to be the bigger person here. Take the high road and be respectful to her no matter how coarse she is with you. Smile, say please and thank you. One day she may drop her attitude and then you will be rewarded. Remember, you did not marry her, but she comes with the deal.

A parent can sometimes go too far with trying to protect their kids or she may just be a control freak. Either way you cannot change her you can only try to influence her by your actions. Don't give her a reason to dislike you.

This is of course all your choice, you can take the high road or confront her every chance you get and end up alone.

It is a difficult position for your SO to be in and I would not want to be in his place. Many will say that he needs to tell her to back off, and while that might be somewhat true it will obviously never happen so there is no sense in pursuing it.

Best to be the adult here and protect your relationship if that is what you want.

Yoda out

For sure!! It would be nice if you could get along with your future mother in law, BUT it can definitely work between you and your s.o. without there being a relationship there. It should be able to at least.

Yes, but first I would have to say that you should give it a chance with your future MIL. I didn't think I would like mine, but the more I get to know her, the more I like her. And sometimes, I would call her out on stuff; she wouldn't even know that what she said/did bothered me. As long as you make an effort to be nice, and accomodating the best you can, I think your s.o. will see that and hopefully go to bat for you when you need it...if nothing else, they can at least act as a barrier. After all, this woman is going to be the grandmother to your children should you decide to have any. Just give it a try. Good luck.

Like everything else in life, its how u choose to look at it, and deal with it. It will require work. How much influence does she have in your life? in your s.o. life? You guys need to communicate and compromise about what u expect and set boundaries i.e. she is welcommed for dinner once a week, but can never move in with us...she can babysit during the day, but no sleep overs, do not expect her to be invited to my family occasions, etc ...do not let her cause stress in your relationship, or at least take strides to try to minimize it...and NIP IT in the bud!

Yea I know plenty of people, including my own mother, who have that same problem and it works fine. Just depends on how supportive your s.o. is about how you feel. My daughters fathers mother is a ***** and a 1/2. His brothers wife won't have anything to do with her and was involved with his family for 8 years but just couldn't take it anymore and decided to not have anything to do with her and his family anymore. He is totally supportive because he loves her and well... he knows how his mother and fam can be. It totally devastated her because she tried but there's only so much you can do with a person like that. Good luck.

It depends on your S.O. If he's constantly siding with the MIL, choosing her over you, or can't seem to stand up to her/stop her from interfering with the relationship, then it wouldn't work. If none of that is a problem, then there shouldn't be any problems. As for you, if simply being civil to your MIL works, then again, there shouldn't be a problem. If you keep your distance and the SO has no problem with that, then once again, there shouldn't be a problem.

Like I said, it depends on a lot of factors.

yes there is a chance. If your guy stands up to her takes your side. you need to lay down some boundaries and have a serious talk about this BEFORE you get married. You have to let your guy know that this is a deal breaker. he has to talk with her alone abut what he expects.

if he does all this for you, keep him. If he can't stand up and fight for you then he isn't worth it and if you do get married this will always be a problem but you can limit the damage it causes by:

if you move away and only tolerate her when she visits for a week at a time that might work

if you are firm but polite. don't disrespect her, just grin and bare it (only for short periods of time...if you have to do this for hours, days or weeks that would be hard)

If you really think your future mother-in-law will cause more problem in your marriage. I think its best for you to sit down with him and talk about this openly between you and him. I don't know how close he is to him mother, but don't go on an all out attack on his mother. Just explain to him about your relationship with his mother. Ask him why does she treat you this way? I hope the two of you can reach a solution. good luck

Yes, but it won't be fun!! Your S.O should be standing up for you and dealing with his mother about the issue. His family, his problem!

Yes, and make sure you don't let her run you over. Also avoidance is a good idea. I didn't get along with my father in law and I finally told him I wasn't married to him I was married to his son and if he didn't like it don't come to my house. After that we got along very well. Mother in laws are not that bad they just fear losing their babies. If you trully love each other it will work out.