Destination Wedding Hotel Etiquette...?

If you can afford it, then of course it's a nice gesture. However, people that really want to be there will have no problem paying for travel and lodging costs. It's a good idea to arrange for transportation to the hotel, i.e. rent a van or shuttle, and definitely have something special for everyone that traveled to do while they're there, maybe a tour of the town or a special dinner or brunch to thank them for being there? I also put baskets together with special favors, snacks, and engagement pictures and had the hotel put them in the rooms of our guests. Just a few ideas!

Five months is appropriate notice for a destination wedding. It's understandable that many people may not be able to attend a destination wedding (sometimes that's the point), but I'm not sure how much notice you were expecting? I've been a part of destination wedding parties in the past (and plan on having one myself) and my partner and I have always paid for ourselves. Weddings are expensive enough without paying for travel and accommodation for guests. It's unfortunate if the wedding location has changed since the bridal party accepted their roles, and I believe that due to changed circumstances they would be able to opt out, but they should do so now before much time goes by, or forever hold their peace. As for a family friendly wedding, I'm sure you don't really expect that children would attend all events, the couple is getting married, you can't expect them to plan around the children of others. If I were in the bride's position, I'd probably invite all the ladies to join me in a spa day too. A destination wedding is about enjoying a beautiful and/or meaningful location for the to-be-weds, and inviting loved ones to share that time away with you. At the end of the day, a wedding is a celebration of the love of two people and you should feel happy that they requested your company to share the day with them. If their wedding doesn't meet your plans, ideals or budget, and you feel unhappy about it on so many fronts, you should respectfully decline. No matter your thoughts, I'm sure the bride has a lot of stressful details on her mind at the moment, and it is completely inappropriate for you to discuss proper etiquette with her, or anyone else involved in the wedding. That would be poor etiquette on your behalf.

It's hard to say. I've had to travel to many weddings, because our family also lives all over the place. I always paid the hotel bill myself. I always thought that was just a part of accepting an invitation to an out-of-town wedding. On the other hand, we're having a destination wedding, THIS SAtURDAY (WOW), in St Thomas, and we're paying the airfare and hotel rooms for our immediate families (12 people). I think this is something you have to plan based on your individual family, really. If you know someone may not attend just because of the cost, I'd offer to pay the bill.

We are also very aware that our guests are going to great lengths to attend, and we're giving them a little extra becaus of that. We'll be hosting a welcome dinner on Friday night for everyone that will kind of kick off the whole weekend, then, of course, providing lunch with full open bar after the wedding itself.

If the Gladly Family in Denver gives a party and chooses to invite the Wiley Family in Dallas, the Franklin Family in Detroit, the Dinkle Family in Seattle, and the Harper Family in Atlanta, the Gladly Family is not under any OBLIGATION to provide lodging or transportation for their guests, even if the guests are cousins or siblings, even if the occasion is a wedding party. However, the Gladly Family may find themselves with a long list of "regret" and a very short list of "accept" when they do the final headcount.

The good news is that it is never incorrect to offer to provide transportation and lodging for your guests, no matter whether they live near or far. Just be sure that the transportation and lodging arrangements are to your guests' liking rather than assuming that your choices will work for them.

As far as I know, you're not really responsible for travel and hotel costs, but if there are guests that you know don't have the wherewithal to handle it on their own, quietly take care of some of their expenses. Just secure a small block of rooms for them, see if you can find a travel agent that will give you a group discount on tickets purchased. For those that are paying their own way, gift baskets or upgrades on hotel services should do.

I am having a destination wedding in Vegas and while I want as many of my family and friends to come as are able, I won't be devastated if they can't make it. I am considering paying only for my mother and father to be there (my fiance's parents cannot come due to poor health) because I really do want them there.

I want everyone to treat the weekend of our wedding as a vacation and to simply take the time to come to our wedding. We'll be hosting a party in our area later on for everyone.

You could foot the bill for your attendants (but not their spouses or partners) and possibly your parents. Otherwise, it would be as if they were going to need to travel to your hometown - guests' transportation and lodging is generally their own responsibility if they choose to attend.

When guests are invited to a destination wedding, they are expect to provide their own transportation and accommodations. It's a nice gesture to pay, but not something I would do for every guest. You'll break the bank that way.

I would provide the transportation and accommodations for both set of parents and grandparents. If you have a sibling, that can't really afford to travel, pay for them.

But, don't feel obligated to pay for friends, co-workers or distant relatives. It's an EXTREMELY nice gesture, but if you don't offer it's NOT rude.

No you are not responsible for paying for their hotel costs or travel costs. They know they will have to pay for it and they will come if they can afford to I guess. Don't worry, just let people know that while you would love for them to attend, you completely understand if they can't because if the cost involved.

you are not responsible for any costs. you could pay for the wedding party as a bonus but even that is not necessary. enjoy your big day! (and don't worry about the guests too much)

I would say you are responsible for hotel costs and possible airfair if necessary. However, if it is family, they might be willing to split the cost. We paid for air and the family paid for their own hotel. That way they could stay where they could afford.

If you can afford it, another nice touch is to have either a welcome reception for the family or a buffett breakfast the day after the wedding before everyone leaves and that should be your responsibility.