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How long does it take to get over, and what would you do?
I'm 27, I've had my fair share of serious girlfriends in the past. I met a girl who is awesome, she's pretty right on for what I'm looking for. The trouble is the timing. She works from 7:30-9:30 every day and is in bed by 10:30. She's works most weekends too, and it doesn't leave much time for a social life. To boot, she got promoted in her job into her ex's old dept and she just realized she's not fully over him yet. This past week was really killer for her and she told me last night that she doesn't think she has time for anythign right now, but she wants hang out if she does something fun.
I know I usually get over people best when I'm hanging out with friends and people of the opposite sex and just having fun without any preconceived notions. It's the same for girls, right?
I also am wondering if I'm handling this situation the best. I don't want to come off as needy or too available, but it's hard when you're trying to work around small openings once or twice/wk
We've gone out a few times and have had a really good time each time, I briefly met her family, and we talk about other things we want to do, but the time constraints are not permitting it.
We talked that neither of us are quite ready to just jump into a serious relationship just yet, so we decided that we should just be friends and see where it heads. The intent of that is so that netiher of us feels terrible if we get too busy to hang out or call for a few days or whatever. Do you think this is the best way to handle this situation, or am I missing something?
I'm usually very good at reading people, but I'm getting way mixed signals from her. It feels like she wants to hang out and has fun with me, but she's so busy and pulled in so many different directions that it's becoming a burden for her at the moment.
6 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Honestly, if she says she doesn't have time then just respect that and be friends. The best thing to do is to keep in contact with her. If you still have feelings for her don't stop talking her because you 2 stopped dating. Just be casual with her. And spend time with her when she gets some free time.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Nothing is wrong with you. The only thing that makes me unsure in your situation is her feelings towards her ex. I wouldn't want you to get burned. So, I would tread very carefully or start pursuing other options. I'm sorry, but everything starts with a thought. If she's thinking about her ex, she may act upon it. At least, she was honest to share that with you. Her actions, the "let's be friends mode", is usually an inidicator. And, I don't have a lot of free time myself as I work 7 days a week, but my boyfriend knows he's a priority. You have to make time for love. She's thinking about her own interests right now, maybe you should do the same. You deserve to be happy. When or if she's ready to be serious, she'll come back. If she doesn't come back, she wasn't meant for you. I'm sure there's a beautiful woman out there willing to give you the love you deserve. It may take some time, but give yourself time to get over her. Let me tell you where to start....stop calling her! That way you can tell if she's for real or not.
- 1 decade ago
Spending time with someone is an important feature in a relationship. If thats missing, things will turn ugly pretty soon. It also sounds like she's getting somewhere with her life by having a stable job. You should definately talk to her about how you feel. If there is nothing that you guys can do, you guys should both agree to be friends. You should respect her in that her job is important to her. Always keep in contact though.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
If she was interested she would make an effort, but take this as a hint. She had time for her ex didn't she? So you may be in the 'friend zone'. As for getting over it, do just what you stated. Hang out with friends, work out, spend time by yourself. You'll get over her! And soon enough you'll find a girl that will make time for you!!
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- ?Lv 45 years ago
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