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How do I overcome my jealousy with my boyfriend and his coworker?
My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. We live together but are not engaged. We are both teachers. However, we teach at different schools. As the school year is approaching I can feel my jealousy and insecurities coming back. He shares an office with a female and they go to eat lunch once a week. She is getting married in October. I know they do not do anything sexually however both he and she are flirtatious in general. I have spoken to him numerous times about it and I even went along once with them for lunch. She knows about me and always asks about me. But how do I get it through my head, (without discussing it with him) that it is okay and how do I overcome my jealousy toward the whole situation and her as a whole? It has caused many fights between he and I and I am already upset about this upcoming year. How can I not let it affect me?Even when I think that I am over it, it creeps back to bothering me and comes out as an arguement with my boyfriend.
**please only serious answers as I do not think I can handle any rude remarks.
***Also, as mentioned, I have spoke to my boyfriend about this and he sees nothing wrong with what he is doing.
1 Answer
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
i have a similar situation, and i cant ever get the thought out of my head that is something is going to happen.
what i do, is take a few deep breaths, then think about the situation, the basics for you-
1-weve been together for three years
2-shes getting married
3-he hasnt done anything shady before
(and all of the positives about your relationship)
then come to terms that, probably nothing will happen
most guys are oblivious to the things they do, things like going to lunch with a co worker. they dont think anything of it, so neither should you.
my boyfriend goes out to eat with a friend of his who is a girl quite often, but i just trust him. and ive been hurt before, but thats all you can do, is trust and hope for the best. and if yall have a solid good relationship, where he hasnt done anything bad before, after three years there really is no need to worry or be jealous
easier said than done, but when that thought comes into your head, try doing what i suggested. just dont dwell on the thought, that would be the worst thing to do.
youd hurt yourself and then you could be so insecure it could start more fights with your boyfriend and things might happen
thats the scary thing
goodluck :)
