Music graduate school students or graduates, what would you do in this situation?

This is a big frustration, I'm sure!!

Honestly, the best thing you can do is to get out. This school obviously does not have its act together. Can I ask where this is? (I understand if you don't want to share that information)

If you do want to stick it out, at least for the year, here are some things to think about.

*Set up a meeting with the college/university's dean of graduate studies. If they have a graduate program, then there must be SOMEONE who knows what's going on -- they can't all be as clueless as the people you've had the misfortune of dealing with.

*In my experience (and the experience of many others I've known), you can't usually get assistantship money unless you're a full-time student. At the graduate level, this might be as few as 9 credits...but obviously, this could vary depending on the school. Your assistantship hours do not count towards this.

*It's not uncommon at all for your assistantship to say "X hours" and actually require "X+Y hours." It's unfair, but that has been the norm from the people I've known (including myself). Graduate assistants are looked at as cheap labor, let's face it. And if you're a teaching assistant, you might have "X hours" of teaching duties...but then, just like public school teachers, you have to put in "y additional hours" of your own time grading papers, preparing lessons plans, etc.

I would say that, if you're going to stay in this program, the first thing you need to do is locate some written documents (do not accept word-of-mouth...obviously that hasn't been doing much good for your situation so far) that tell you the requirements for financial aid, whether that be need-based, scholarship-based, or in payment for assistantship duties. How many credits do you need to carry? Where do you go to file your W4, I9, all that good stuff? When is the (first) disbursement date for funds? Who do I contact if I don't receive the money promised me? etc

I should ask, at this point, what does the document that you signed say? You should have been given some sort of paperwork where you accepted financial aid and/or this assistantship. Make copies of that document and carry it with you to every meeting you have.

I hope this helps in someway. I really think that your best bet might be to cut your losses, get out of the program, get a job that will help you pay your bills until your apartment lease is up (unless you can get out of it early), and apply for more established schools for next year.

Good luck!!

PS-- you also might consider posting a similar question in the Higher Education forum on Y!A. It doesn't sound like your situation is necessarily limited to music study...maybe someone there can help more.

You poor thing. These people are probably not TRYING to ruin your experience, they are just incredibly disorganized and ruining things for you is a side effect. Here's what I think:

Grad School for musicians is where many people spend the big bucks and go for the best experience they can get. If you are looking to enrich through grad school, you need to pick a reputable school that runs itself well. I don't know where you are, but if the treatment you are getting is typical, then you should get out. I got my Masters to fill a requirement quickly, so I did it online. When I decide to get another one (and I want to), and I can take my time, I will get it somewhere worthwhile.

It sounds like you need to find another school. One that is run more efficiently, and one that can match your current abilities. Your private studio can have undergrads in it, but your courses need to be for graduates only. If you are ahead of everyone else to the point where you don't know where you'll be palced for the opera, then you need to leave. If you've discovered that you are such a big fish in such a small pond this early in the year, that is not a good sign.

I've never been a grad student; tried for 6 yrs. to obtain an undergraduate degree, but only succeeded in acquiring something like 83 towards the necessary 120 before dropping out; and this was years ago.

But sounds to me like you're being given the royal run-around; and I would opt out, as soon as it's financially and academically feasible for you.

Seems the primary business principles nowadays, are deception and deceive; as long as it produces an extra buck: academic institutions, no exception.

Really feel for you. And no, you're not in over your head; you've just "been taken", thru no fault of your own. You sound like a very mature, wise but unfortunately, too trusting a human being.

Much good luck, and keep trying: don't give up your educational goals; am sure your family will be understanding and as helpful as they can.

Alberich

I think there are those that graduate and can't read some of them have no math skills they could care less..the parents and teachers can't be blamed all the time..you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink..if a high school kid doesn't show interest after being encouraged what's left but to turn him/her loose..

First of all, write every experience down in a journal and date it. Document every discrepancy, everything that they told you that hasn't happened, every time you've been asked to do something extra. Keep each item separate so that a stranger with absolutely no experience and without the ability to talk to you to clear up any misunderstandings can follow it easily.

Second, go outside the university community, take your documentation with you, and get legal advice. Do not go to anyone connected with the university itself (since so-called "confidential" counseling will be repeated back to the people who are giving you trouble). If necessary go to another town or get advice by email.

A lawyer can advise you much better than we can, and many will offer to listen to your story for free.

I've been through this myself, so you have my sympathies! Good luck!

Don't you think you should use the time that you spent typing all these postings to:

1. Bring the money issue to the higher administrative level(maybe the president of the school or dean)

2. Seek Legal action against whichever department that's definitely screwing with the money for the graduate students.

Don't waste your time babbling forever here.

All these people can talk all they want but you are the one who's not getting the money that you are entitled.

Well if you think that you need all these strangers' approval to get what you deserve, be my guest!!

GOOD LUCK

Gotta agree with Wirechoir! Actually, we went out to lunch, and your post came up in the conversation. She finished grad school online, as you know, and my son is IN grad school, but summers, since he is a teacher, too. DIL is done. Looks like one of two things happened - you signed something and did not read all the fine print OR they are changing the rules mid-stream. Sit down coolly and calmly and make LISTS - pro and con. If there is a GENUINE benefit to sticking it out, doing what they tell you, and getting roles, connections, etc. from this - then stick it out. But if, on balance, there is NO "sure thing" at the end of this - then cut your losses and bail out. The whole thing with uprooting your family is truly icky - I hope that your husband can find work, and you kids are going to have supervision, school, etc.

Wirechoir got her online degree because she was under the gun time wise, and got it in instructional tech, I think - not music. YOU want a program that leads to MORE performance - so online grad school is not really the way for YOU. Sad to say, you are really in a mess here - and if it does not show any signs of working to YOUR benefit, then you gotta go. You ARE paying for this, are you not? Even with some kind of grad assistantship, etc. - if it it LESS benefit and MORE aggravation that it is worth to you - game over. How hard would it be to *turn back the clock* - go home for a *do-over* next year or next semester? Can you break your lease? My MM is from BU - the *old* way - 4 summers of terrifying classes with people who all scared the crap out of you, and were spitting images of John Houseman. I am NOT a big fan of online studies in Music, or certain other things - for many subjects, GREAT - but not for an opera singer!

We will be thinking of you, and hope this turns out well. I am away for about 10 days, and may or may not be online - but I will check on you when I can. God speed.

ADDED - WOOHOO! You got money out of them - and got them to MOVE thier butts! Do you know the famous Beverly Sills story? She was in an opera in Italy when she was young, and was being nice to everybody - she was so THRILLED to be doing it! - and they were being snotty back! She had this hideous dress to wear, that clashed with her red hair - and kept getting a run-around about them fixing it. Someone said that they would not take her seriously until they saw some DIVA cme out. So - at the next rehearsal, there was that hideous dress on a hanger - again! She walked over to the nearest dressmaker - and they all wear SCISSORS on a ribbon around their neck - tlook her schissors and on stage, CUT THE DRESS RIGHT UP THE FRONT, and stomped on it! A moment of silence - then thunderous applause as she walked off.

Her new dress was on a hanger the next day.

Now, you might not be ab le to do THAT - but when you stand up for yourslel, you either get results or not - but you sure FEEL better about yourself - you took action! So - maybe things WILL work out - but know that YOU have the power ot make them change - even if it means leaving!

Once or twice a year, out of the zillions of wedding I play, I get A Difficult Bride. I calmly tell her that clearly, her standards are SO hgih that even all my wonderful musicians cannot meet them - so I will email back her deposit immediately. NO!!!!!!! Who am I going to get NOW????? Calling someone's bluff - politely and gently - sometimes propels things forward.

I will continue to Think Good Things (can we say "pray" here, or will somebody pitch a fit?) for you. Invite me to your grad recital - or your Met debut!

And if posting here helps you deal with this - in a strange place - then ignore the brats who tell you NOT to. They are bratty elsewhere, too.