liberal conservative views and conservative liberal views?

Abortion is a bad example. Roe v. Wade was monumental because it struck down control of abortion law at the state level and made it a federal issue, thus increasing the power of the federal government. Most conservatives would be happy with the power to decide abortion law returning to the states (ie less FEDERAL government).

I think gay marriage is a better example. Republican idiocy reached new heights when they started talking about making an AMENDMENT to the Constitution banning gay marriage...wth? True Republicans would leave that issue alone and let the individual states decide. Democrats, opposing any restrictions on gay marriage are actually siding with the less federal government.

Your whole premise is wrong.

First of all conservatives nor liberal either one believe in small government.

They both believe that the government getting involved in something they don't want is big government while government controlling what they are OK with is small government.

The only conservatives that have a consistent view of making the government smaller are libertarians.

All other conservatives, are OK with making government bigger as long as the government is controlling what they want it to, while leaving alone what they don't want it involved with.

Conservatives want more moral laws, bigger defense spending, and more freedom for the economic elites.

This is precisely what Got Germany in trouble in the 1930s.

Liberals want more individual freedom, less moral policing, and moderate economic regulation and safety nets for the poor.

There is no way to ban something like drugs and abortion and realistically expect the government not to get bigger.

This is about as broad as you can get, there are exceptions, but liberals tend to want government to act as a parental unit to the country. They tend to lean more toward security. Conservatives tend to lean toward allowing the country to be responsible for their own actions. They tend to lean toward liberty. Usually, when you have more security, you sacrifice liberty, and vice versa. Again, that is about as broad a statement as I can give, there are exceptions.

liberals spend more than conservatives

"Life Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness". It is a Conservative thing you just wouldn't understand.