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TWo jokes..want to read?
**Spaghetti**
A wealthy man was having an affair with an Italian woman for a few years.
One night, during one of their rendezvous, she confided in him that she was pregnant.
Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to have the child. If she stayed in Italy,
he would also provide child support until the child turned 18.
She agreed, but wondered how he would know when the baby was born. To keep it discrete, he told her to mail him a post card, and write "Spaghetti" on the back. He would then arrange for child support.
One day, about 9 months later, he came home to his confused wife.
"Honey," she said, "you received a very strange post card today."
"Oh, just give it to me and I'll explain it later," he said.
The wife obeyed, and watched as her husband read the card, turned white, and fainted.
On the card was written "Spaghetti, Spaghetti, Spaghetti. Two with meatballs, one without."
________________________________________________________
***Girls night out***
Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.
The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These d*** girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'
20 Answers
- Anonymous1 decade agoFavorite Answer
omg.. that was so funny... this is one of the best jokes question i've ever seen.. seriously.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
The first one cracked me up XD
I've already heard the second one but still funny :)
- mingerLv 45 years ago
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
It took me long enough to understand the first joke, and it's damn funny! LMAO
I've heard the second joke
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
Haha. That's great. The last one was way too funny.
Thanks for the jokes.
2 w. meatballs one w/o.
Amazing. Ha.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
There quite funny.
- 1 decade ago
haha, the first one was good
but i dont understand the second really
hmm
im blonde, that might be it
- Anonymous1 decade ago
ha ha ha the second one was hilarious
